If you came home early and you entered your bedroom only to find your 15 year old daughter naked and masturbating infont of the computer web cam. What would you do.
2007-01-02 03:02:52 · 34 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Close the door and ask her to come out and have a talk with her. During the course of the conversation I would inform her that what she was doing was a poor choice as there are a lot of pediphiles on line and that she may be placing herself in danger. As well I would suggest to my daughter that she may not just be masterbating for the individual that she was trying to please but that whoever it was may be videotaping this act and that she may end up being posted on some website for the world to see. I would let her know that this was also a very dangerous thing to do as if she ever wants to have any type of professional career later in life that this may come back to bite her when she gets older as people may try and either blackmail her with this pics or just expose them to the public an ruin any career objectives that she has in mind. Kids don't think of the long term consequences and only deal with immediate gratification and need to become more aware of how there actions today could affect them later in life.
2007-01-02 03:12:26 · answer #1 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 7⤊ 2⤋
First I would collect myself and calm down.
Then I would try to find a neutral zone in the house and have a mature (hopefully long) conversation with my daughter.
Without knowing the circumstances don't jump to conclusions.
If this was with her long time boyfriend/girlfriend then it might not be as big a deal as it seems on the face of it. Better that they have mutual computer sex than that she get pregnant at 15.
If it's with strangers obviously that's a different situation. Unless you have a unique relationship, chances are she's not going to give your opinion a lot of respect right now.... and don't forget she is probably very embarrased too, even if she doesn't act like it. If this is the situation I would suggest therapy. Just so she can learn where this desire/need is coming from, not to make you feel better.
A little therapy for you could be in order as well, so you don't blame yourself. Teenagers are highly sexual beings. It's hard to come to terms with that as parents.
I'm sure lot's of folks will say to take the camera away. I don't think this is the real problem or solution. She can easily get another camera, or worse yet, go outside of your home to engage in this activity.
It's more about having an open and honest relationship with your daughter.
2007-01-02 03:16:53 · answer #2 · answered by mellokittyx4 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Oh my God, I really have no idea.
But after the shock, I would crush the camera.
Check who was addressed to.
Then sit her down and a have a chat as For how Long? To Whom? And What she has on the computer.
Then I would make sure that she does actually attends school regularly.
Come home Right after school.
If she goes out, I WOULD be Going with her.
And at night time she's at home.
Until I'm happy she has got the message.
OBVIOUSLY no violence.
Where would that get you?
But be Strict and firm.
No Friends at home. Doors always opened.
School bag check before and after school.
Sex education as an emergency and straight on the pills.
Whatelse can you do.
Good luck.x
2007-01-02 04:44:41 · answer #3 · answered by Kc 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Oh Boy..loaded question and a shock to you huh! Tough love time! First of all, keep your cool, but since you are writing this after you found her, you probably already lost your cool with her. We had something sort of similar with one of our six children (once upon a time) and here is how we handled it. First (thank God) our child wasn't home when we found the evidence so we had time to think. Secondly we called our youth pastor and enlisted his help with this situation prior to our face-to-face with our child. Then, before our teen did come home, we took his computer out of his room and put it in the living room, causing him to only use the computer where he could be seen. So you ask, what about when we aren't home? No problem, router locked up in my office gets turned off, and no wireless connection on his computer. Also there are services such as "Convenant Eyes" that records everywhere your teen goes and does online and then sends a report to a third party of your choice (ie: you, pastor, counselor) on a weekly or monthly basis. We (parents, youth pastor) also agreed that weekly accountability meetings/phone calls were neccessary. The reason for this? Well, if this is happening, who is on the other end? How old are they, what else are they into? And what are they going to do when they get older? In other words, one thing leads to another if not stopped now. Oh, and no TV in room either for senior year (yes, this all happened summer before senior year).......
How did it all come out? Straight A's all year, Honor Roll, Football, Track, kept his word and promises, dedicated his life to serve Jesus, now..attending a major university studying to be a teacher. Things CAN turn around! Parents...it is up to us to handle these situations in the correct manner.
2007-01-02 03:26:03 · answer #4 · answered by faith4ricknlisa 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
have a long serious chat with her about the dangers, also it depends what site she is using, it could be some peado watching her and maybe stalk her in the future...restrict her from using the PC until she understands that it's not to be tolerated...or better still get a parental guide installed with blocks on all of the adult sites she has used, look up the history and see how many times she has done it, find out where and block them, put passwords on your PC, so when she asks to use it, make sure it's you who accesses and not her, only allow her to go on certain sited and block the adult sites...don't leave her open for opportunities like that...it's dangerous
2007-01-02 03:14:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well...you have to look on the bright side, at least she is exploring her body with out the aide of a physical partner...masturbating is a natural thing and some of us mature sexually faster than others....mind you how quickly they learn about the Internet to do so...If you have a good relationship with your daughter...sit down and have a chat...a long chat...I think my first question is why she feels the need to masturbate in front of a web-cam?...and who was on the receiving end of that cam?...that's me tho...I'm in the Grandparent stage...web-cams weren't around when my children were young....good luck!
2007-01-03 22:22:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
At her age, she must have been practicing such for some time. Therefore, all you can do is to discourage her or tell her the side effect. Taking the system away from her will not stop or solve the problem.
2007-01-02 03:16:55 · answer #7 · answered by joe 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i would make sure who it was she was on webcam to like if ti was someone of her won age or an older guy. If it was an older guy you have to tell her what you think and if it is someone of the same age you cant really blame her dont u remember what you were like when you were that age im sure u masterbated when you were young just keep an eye on her and make sure she is ok.xx x x
2007-01-02 08:34:01 · answer #8 · answered by rachelxxflower 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For a mother to even be asking this question on the interenet is fucked up so I wonder where your daughter gets her behaivour from? MMM?
2007-01-02 22:39:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thow the web cam away! Making sure I destroy it first! Restrict internet access time, if she fails to comply the internet would go altogether.
2007-01-02 03:13:05 · answer #10 · answered by Need_to_know 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋