I have a mother who clearly has psychological problems. Today, for no good reason, she hung the phone up on me. By the way, she is 65 years old! This behavior seems more appropriate for a five-year-old.
All I did was tell her that I was too busy to talk about going to my cousin's bridal shower in April (today is January 2nd), so she was hurt by this somehow and hung up.
This is crazy behavior, no?
2007-01-02 02:25:29 · 14 answers · asked by NYCLibrarian 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Yes, a little childish, but at her age I am sure she is lonely. In her mind you are neglecting the one who nurtured and raised you and she sees your inattention as being ungrateful. Grin and bear it! My brothers and I get this from our MOM too! We all laugh about her outbursts secretly, almost like we try to keep score on who had the most outrageous conversation with her.
If you really want to keep her from reacting you are going to have to set aside some time for her, to let her know you still love her. Good Luck!
2007-01-02 02:30:53 · answer #1 · answered by stacey h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Couldn't you have found a kinder way to say that you were busy?
I don't want to presume to know you or your mother because I don't. But basing this on my own very difficult relationship with one of my daughters, (mainly because she the type of person who doesn't take into consideration other people's feelings when she talks to them), and I'm fed up with it and with her justifications that "that's the way she is". I know I taught her better than that, but go figure.
But back to your situation, is this the first time that you have told your mother you're busy? Personally, I find it very rude to be told that someone is busy (translation, too busy to talk to you).
Couldn't you say instead, "Mother, would it be okay if we talked about this later, (tomorrow, whatever)? You're still saying that you're busy, but it is a kinder and gentler way of saying it.
And this is the problem with today's youth: People just think that kindness and courtesy are too antiquated, and the truth is that in this day and age, we could use more of it. It would be easier even for those who disagree with each other to get along better.
It is possible that your mother may have been having a bad day and you were the straw that broke the camel's back.... or you have have been rude to her once too many times. Sometimes rude people are oblivious... unless they get a taste of their own medicine.
Again, this is just food for thought. It is not my intention to judge you because I don't know you or your mother. I'm addressing this more from my experience.
2007-01-02 02:53:15 · answer #2 · answered by llexpat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seems sort of strange, for a 65 year old, however if she has psychological problems for real then that could be the answer. I've had people hang up on me already and I hate when that happens especially if your having an agrument with a person it's rude or if the person was upset then they hang up. I'd say it's mostly rude of the other person to hang up.
2007-01-02 02:30:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well once people get older their behavior can sometimes regress back to behavior that of a child. Show me an adult who says they have never hung up on ANYONE ever and ill show you a liar! Maybe the tone of voice you used to tell her sounded rude or maybe she was just trying to get off the phone as quickly as possible so she didnt waste anymore of your precious time. Ya know, your mom isnt going to live forever and i would hate for you to regret not taking a few moments for a phone conversation wth her. When someone hangs up on me, i politely call them back immediately, and appologize for the "dropped call." Then i continue with, "now what were you saying?" it really gets em everytime!
2007-01-02 02:35:55 · answer #4 · answered by Aubrey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's very rude. She sounds like a tough person to deal with! I would only hang up on someone if they were trying to sell me something and wouldn't take no for an answer or if I was arguing with someone on the phone and attempts to end the conversation had failed.
2007-01-02 02:30:15 · answer #5 · answered by ANGEL 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not crazy, but pouty behavior. That isn't necessarily a psychological issue. Maybe she was just crushed not to have a chance to talk to you on the phone.
2007-01-02 02:28:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it was rude of you to tell your mother you don't have time to talk to her, shes the one that brought you into this world, and you only live once, spend time with your mother shes asking you in her own way, it seems as though you've hurt her feelings. do all you can for your mother while you still can.
2007-01-02 02:46:16 · answer #7 · answered by sissy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's wrong to hang up on people.
But if your mother clearly has psychological problems, you should seek to understand her problems.
Did you offer to call her back when you had time???? Were you abrupt???
2007-01-02 02:29:00 · answer #8 · answered by snvffy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She was mad at you and hung up. No big deal. Older folks have a lot of time to plan ahead and we don't, so deal with it.
2007-01-02 02:41:26 · answer #9 · answered by Jim G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on the situation I think.
2007-01-02 02:34:40 · answer #10 · answered by Jodi C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋