2007-01-02 01:17:54 · 12 answers · asked by karen. 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
what time is it there? cuz its like 9.00 am here...
2007-01-02 01:19:46 · answer #1 · answered by panda 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The seven dwarves are in Rome and they go on a tour of the city. After awhile, they go to the Vatican and meet the Pope. Grumpy, for once, seems to have a lot to say; he keeps asking the pontiff questions about the church, and in particular, the nuns.
"Your Holiness, do you have any really short nuns?"
"No, my son, all our nuns are at least 170 meters tall."
"Are you sure? I mean, you wouldn't have any nuns that are, say, about my height? Maybe a little shorter?"
"I'm afraid not. Why do you ask?"
"No reason. (pause) "Positive? Nobody in a dark suit who is about 90, 75-90 centimeters tall?"
"I'm sure."
"Okay. Thanks anyway."
Grumpy looks dejected at this news, and the Pope wonders why; so he listens to the dwarves as they leave the building.
"What did he say? What did he say?" chant the other six dwarves.
Grumpy says, "He said, they don't have any short nuns."
And the other six dwarves start laughing hysterically and chanting, "Grumpy *f*u*c*k*e*d* a penguin! Grumpy *f*u*c*k*e*d* a penguin!"
2007-01-02 01:27:05 · answer #2 · answered by ssssss 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alright here you go ...... This boy goes up to his mom and says "Guess what I learned in school today" the mom answers with "whats that hunny", The boy with excitement in his voice replies " I have the biggest dick in the whole 3rd grade, is it because I am black mom?" The mom says " No hunny its because you are 17".
Its funnier when you say it then read it.
Another one: Ask him : "Have you ever been neck deep in *****?"
He should say "no" then you say "well then you must be a assshole baby."
Hope you liked them. Go to the pub and have fun*
I forgot one more for the road: This guy is casual watching tv in his living room when his wife bashes into the home screaming she just won 6 million on the lottery and she tells him to pack. Full with excitment he says do I get the winter clothes? hiking gear? swimsutis? what do i need to pack? She say I dont give a f uck just get the h ell out. lol lol lol
2007-01-02 01:25:23 · answer #3 · answered by jdnsmama1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Any working gadget you run will choose for AntiVirus, Malware Scanners, and a Firewall to verify optimal preserve practices. New viruses and secret agent ware are stepped forward on a each and every day foundation. Even suggestions companies discovered IE 8 is subjected to unauthorized get get entry to to with a backdoor presently got here across. Apple is likewise subjected to viruses. verify which you do set up an actual notch protector like AVG/Avast/Norton/McAfee.
2016-11-25 22:16:54 · answer #4 · answered by scutt 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The biggest joke in Australia is the English cricket team!
2007-01-02 01:20:08 · answer #5 · answered by Flab 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Paddy wins £6 million on the lottery.
Camelot says "we're sorry we're a bit strapped for cash this week, would it be okay if we give you £3 million this week and £3 million the following week"?
Paddy says "aww just give me the f*cking pound back and stop f*cking me about" ;-D x
2007-01-02 01:22:11 · answer #6 · answered by * 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A blonde lady has just been told about porn films, so she decides to go and rent one! When she gets home she settles down to watch it, except nothing appears on the screen! She rings up the video shop and starts to complain to the manager, the manger ask her for the title of the film so he can sort the problem, the blonde replies 'Head Cleaner'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Enjoy your pint, i prefer kipper wine myself! sent
2007-01-02 01:24:05 · answer #7 · answered by fletch 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok this is a good one.
I just rang up Saddam. You'll never guess what!? The bloody b*stards hung up!
2007-01-02 01:23:39 · answer #8 · answered by dotty 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i wokeup this morning feeling bored and really fed up with life and decided to end it all. so i went to the library and asked the assistant if they had any books on suicide. so she told me they did'nt have any, she said they used to have twenty but no one had ever brought one back
2007-01-02 01:50:33 · answer #9 · answered by briangimma 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
not a joke but a comment,,not pc either,,
"what is it about blind people that makes them walk their dogs all the time,,selfish!
suicide bombers,,,"what makes them tick" argh i feel so bad! this will haunt me now lol
2007-01-02 01:23:14 · answer #10 · answered by lex 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
did you hear about the dyslexic santa, he went around handing out prozzys (erm wwhy is dylexia so hard to spell?)
2007-01-02 01:29:27 · answer #11 · answered by Loverboi007 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋