2007-01-01 16:03:54 · 17 answers · asked by elvishien 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Have you considered boot camp of some sort...you could contact your local police department for help.
2007-01-01 16:05:08 · answer #1 · answered by Ginger P 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I had trouble with my oldest daughter when she was a teenager, It was one problem after another. I tried everything I knew how to do from calling the police, juvenile authorities, taking her for counseling until eventually I ended up in jail for slapping her one day and the state placed her with my Mother where she continued to put my Mother through the same things. You can't discipline your children anymore and they consider it child abuse and want to lock you up and take your kids away because you were trying to make them turn into something.
One thing that I suggest that you do is every little problem that you have with her, no matter how small or little the magnitude you think that it is, that you get it documented through juvenile court...to protect yourself and so that they may EVENTUALLY help you in some way. Take her in front of a juvenile judge and tell them that she is repeatedly running way from home and you don't know what to do with her.
I know she is your child and you want nothing but the best for her. Have you gotten professional counseling for her...not only her but for you and your family? This can cause mental stress on an entire family. If nothing works and she continues then you can always check into having her emancipated (the laws for this vary by state) as a last result no matter how much it hurts.
I wish you, her and your family all the best!
2007-01-02 00:15:09 · answer #2 · answered by sarteaga1970 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either way, you lose. And so does your daughter. She'll be away anyhow... either in a shelter or wherever she goes when she runs away... I know what you're trying to say though. You want to keep her safe. Where does she run to and why does she run? That should help get a line on what's going on. Have you tried other options first? Keep in mind that if you place her somewhere, she can always run from there too. You need to get to the cause of the running, and work from there. Try the school psychologist. She'll help you. She'll know the resources to refer you to. And if that doesn't work, call or get in contact with someone at Covenant House...
http://www.covenanthouse.org/
http://www.covenanthouse.org/nineline/index.html
http://www.covenanthouse.on.ca/Public/Home.aspx
You'll find them pretty much in every state in the US and every province in Canada.
And you might want to share the info with your daughter. At least if she runs again before you find a way to solve the problem, she'll have a safe place to run to.
Good luck.... I'll pray for your daughter when I pray for mine....
2007-01-02 00:32:41 · answer #3 · answered by The ReDesign Diva 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I ran away all the time when I was 14 but I couldn't stay away because I worried about abandoning my brothers and sisters in such a bad situation,I worried if some one beat them ,fed them or raped them today.Your question pisses me off because I wonder what the hell your doing to the kid?Kids don't run off for no reason.Go to family counseling,look at why she want to run off and fix it.I have 4 kids and they never wanted to leave until they were in love or college.At 14 I got a job in a restaurant and my own apartment but every time I went to feed my brothers my ass whole mom would try to put me in juvenile.No 14 year old want to be on the streets,your doing something wrong or she thinks she met "the one."What ever it is get to the bottom of the problem and fix it.She didn't ask to be born and it's your responsibility to raise happy loved children.You don't lock your own kids up or throw them off as someone elses problem after you screwed up.Make things right.
2007-01-02 00:15:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not try counseling first and see if the counselor can find out why she keeps running . If she continues she puts herself at risk out on the street or does she go to a friends house. You can put a stop to that if she goes to a friends house -just send the cops to bring her home they wont want her next time. If nothing else works then go to court and say she is incorrigable and they will put her in foster care.
2007-01-02 00:12:35 · answer #5 · answered by elaeblue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u are too strict with her, she will run away.
She is going thru growing stage and raging harmones.
Stop and listen to her and help her find hobbies to make her happy.
Let her date or she may run away or sneak out.
She is growing up and will be grown before long.
Forget a shelter, make her feel at home in her already home.
Think positive and she will be positive.
2007-01-02 00:38:42 · answer #6 · answered by sunflare63 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before putting them in a shelter you should try to figure out why they are running away and try to fix it so they can be happy where they are.
2007-01-02 00:06:08 · answer #7 · answered by Hola! 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes! But think twice about that. Call up a hot line and asked for help. There is free help for you and your daughter. Be careful you don't want to loose her in the system!
2007-01-02 00:08:51 · answer #8 · answered by Dancingsun 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
maybe thats why she wants to runaway! you should talk to her and find out WHY she wants to runaway then fix it and tell her how much you care about her, and what can happen if she lives on the streets. take it from a 14 yr old who knows!
2007-01-02 00:10:31 · answer #9 · answered by xbeautifulxliex81 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By law you are required as a parent to care for your child until the the age of majority as prescribed by your state. The age of majority for most states is 18.
The legal age in some states is 17.Legal age refers to 2 issues: The age at which the person may have consensual sex and the age at which a person can be tried as an adult for certain criminal offenses.
I can't help but identify that you feel as if you have exhausted all your patience with your daughter. An option that I think can accomodate both interests is legal emancipation (a divorce between the two of you). For this to be successful, your child must meet the legal age to request for emancipation within your state. For most the age is 16.Another factor in this, she must be able to prove that she can care for herself in all aspects of life.For this she will have to present bills,bank records,living expenses,etc.
There are runaway adolescent/community rehab centers for teens that will counsel your child as well as encourage them to obtain employment if they are of age,volunteer work and/or education (diploma or GED) if they are required to be enrolled as required by truancy laws. The action that opens the door to this process is permission by you as the parent to allow such center to provide shelter,food, and counseling to your teen.The major thing here is parental permission because she is still a minor.In most cases, they can serve as a model for a variety of community services, such as drop-in centers for troubled individuals, mediation centers for families, shelters for and residences for teens suffering an acute psychotic break.
The staff will conduct problem resolution therapy with both the child and the parents,anger management,communication strategies,etc to help the teen and their families create a positive living climate. to find one in you area, I recommend that you call the national center for missing and exploited children and enlist their help in trying to locate a center near you.
You know your daughter, not me or anyone else here responding to your question.If leaving home is inevitable, you may want to atleast want to know where she is and be confident in knowing that she is being cared for. I tried my best to be objective in my response. The fact that you are inquiring about a shelter tells me that you are a loving and concerned parent who recognizes that her daughter is inflexible and rebellious. You are doing the right thing in asking for this type of help.Obviously you have tried many others things before that have failed. Aside from this, I would also recommend that you don't compromise your rules or your positions as a parent to cator to your daughters demands. If you do it will send a wrong message to her.Good luck.
2007-01-02 00:30:17 · answer #10 · answered by vince 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋