Hello everyone,
I have been spending a lot of time together with a girl I met about a month ago, we have a lot in common, and have a great time when we go out.
The first thing is that I know I'm going down the "friends" road, and while I don't want to not be friends with her, I would like it to go in the other direction.
So friday night I told her how I am attracted to her. She responded by telling me that she was flattered by what I was telling her. She never said that she was not interested. The problem is that she said she doesn't want to get into a relationship right now because she just ended a 5 year disaster in september.
We're still fine as far as the "friends" thing goes, but what should I do?
I would really like to change her mind, but at the same time I don't want to scare her away. I honestly would rather have her as a friend, then not see her at all. I feel like I made the first move and now I can't do anything unless she does something.
Thanks
2007-01-01 14:51:51 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
She's politely telling you to go pound sand.
Your mission is to get her attracted to you--and to stand out from the rest of the guys. Don't let her be a friend--once you go there it's almost impossible to switch to being a boyfriend.
If you want to see her ask her out on dates--make sure she knows you don't need anymore friends.
2007-01-01 15:00:09 · answer #1 · answered by Mr_B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, the fact that she was flattered puts you in a good position. Not many men express their feeling as well as you did. If it were not for that 5-year disaster of hers, you would be flying high. The time you are spending together is very good, and may be a form of healing for her. Another plus. Tell her also that you are there for her anytime she wants to talk.
Don't use words like "friends" with her. They are not what you are about with her.
2007-01-01 23:03:23 · answer #2 · answered by Monsieur Rick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That hapens to me all the time when you tell a girl how you feel and she doesn't give you a straight answer. So, this is what I did just ask her about it. The way you described it sounds like she is hinting that she needs a break. So, for now become her life saver. Be her friend, until the time comes or just move on because sooner or later it hurt to stay as friends.
2007-01-01 22:58:09 · answer #3 · answered by Berties 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Continue to be her friend at the least. Don't pressure a relationship. Sometimes being more than friends only complicates things instead of making it better. Give her some time to mend her heart. Get to know her better over time ,and then see how things go further down the road.
2007-01-01 23:00:56 · answer #4 · answered by Goldilocks 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Flattery is when a woman is assured she can attract somebody but isn't interested. "Oh it's nice you like me but hell no". I got stuck being a friend for 10 years. I made up a hypothetical situation to see what she had to say and she said I never had a chance. It's not worth the time and effort man. If she aint with it just move on.
2007-01-01 22:57:54 · answer #5 · answered by ZX3R 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like she wants to be friends right now. I would just be the best friend I could be and see how things turn out. She might feel the same as you but is scared to feel right now.
2007-01-01 22:59:01 · answer #6 · answered by masterzuaba 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she just got out of a 5 year relationship, then be patient. Be her friend. As difficult as that may be, it is easier for you to be her friend than to be her rebound.
When she is ready, if ever, then she just may make a move. But you have to be patient. If you push too hard, you won't have her for either a friend or a girlfriend.
It is better to have her in your life as a friend than to not have her in your life at all.
2007-01-01 22:55:51 · answer #7 · answered by Me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that you made your move. she is aware of how you feel. now, back off just a little. let her call you. let her make plans. if she is interested, she'll bump up her intesest in you because she'll be wondering if you lost interest in her. woman like the chase. its sad, but true. or, perhaps (since you're just "friends") make mention to her about another girl you met or you are talking to. woman hate the competition and if she is interested in gaining your full attention she command it! good luck.
2007-01-01 23:10:20 · answer #8 · answered by charliesheen 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well no matter what u want, u gotta think of what she wants too. Need to step lightly when dealing with someone in a sensitive state such as hers. She is only trying to protect herself right now from getting burned again. I know u prob wouldn't be the one to burn her, but she is watching herself from all sides. Be patient, and be there for her when u can, hopefully she can realize what kind of wonderful person you are and be with you.
2007-01-01 22:59:20 · answer #9 · answered by ezrax7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you should listen to her. Hang out and be friends for a while and in a few months or so tell her again. Good Luck
2007-01-01 22:58:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋