How to stop my 7 year old from staring at women's chest?

Question

I'm having a problem at home with my 7 year old step-son with him constantly referring to me as "Sexy" and staring or trying to touch my chest. I understand the part of boys being curious.. but this is too much. It makes me uncomfortable. I've talked to him about being respectful to women and what is appropriate... but what can I do to really make an impact? His father has custody, therefore he lives with me as well. I've asked my husband to talk with him about it and expressed my concerns about his behavior. He said he would, but I'd like to know if there was anything I could do at all that would leave an impression on him that it's not tolerated. Thanks!

Answer 1

Ya know alot of the answer seemed like bullshit!
Whipping a childs *** is not gonna solve it.
For a postive at least he is aware of whats around him. But just be firm and say no thats not right and give him something to do that he is allowed to do. Everytime he does it! I am majoring in child devlopment and this is normal that they are aware but he just sounds more hand-ons. As for your husband talk with him seriously and tell him its really bugging you. Just re direct his attention to something else and firmly tell him NO and thats not right. goodluck it will pass but be firm and stick to your ground!

Answer 2

Sorry for some of the sad answers you have rec. so far. *1st-"sexy" is something your step-son has heard, either in your home, another home, a friend or on tv. He is relating what he has seen and heard in some area and sees you fit the bill. This is not appropriate at all and you have done the right thing talking to him about this and how he should be treating you and all women. I would NOT look for some way to "leave an impression on him", be careful what you do. That impression you leave could hurt in the long run. Just be consistent and be sure you and your husband stay on the same track with this. He does need to be the one to put his foot down and demand respect for you. Your husband needs to show you respect always so your son one day will show the same respect to women in his live. *2nd- He is 7 and curious. I have one too. He has rubbed his hand against my breast when he snuggled up to me for a good night hug. Just once was all. I had my husband talk with him. He was just curious. He has started taking notice of the different size "bumps" women have. It is all a part of the facts of life. I am glad he feels comfortable talking to his daddy about these things. Better to be open and talk everything out truthfully as a child has questions, than to try to correct cover-ups when they are older. - In a couple years try the book "Every Young Man's Battle". I believe it is a Father/Son read.

Answer 3

This behavior is not healthy for a 7 year old. This is an adults behavior and should not be tolerated.

I think that he is seeing and learning this behavior from somebody he admires, or maybe he was seeing this at his former home. Or he is looking at too much TV or movies that are inappropriate for 7 year old children. Or, how about his video games? Does he have any? Look at the video games he is playing to see if they are appropriate. All of them have a classification, as in movies, and for a 7 year old there are those rated eC (early Childhood 3+), and E for Everyone. Those rated T (Teens 13 and up), M (Mature 17+) and AO (adults only 18+) are off-limits for him.

I think that you can talk to your step-son and ask him who he knows who do that. Then you will know for sure from where he have seen that behavior and why he is doing it as well. Children tend to repeat behavior from people they know, and they also repeat things they see very often. Somebody is giving him an example he is repeating. If it is a bad example, he will not know and will repeat that behavior.

Once you know, his father should talk to him too and set rules on what he can see on TV, which video games to play, and from whom he can have as a good "behavior teacher". And, once you both make the rules, don't accept this behavior at home or anywhere else again. Also, if you see some adults doing that, explain to him that this is an adult's behavior and only adults can do that, and children are not allowed to do that. Also, teach him to respect other people's body, and not to touch any "private body part".

Hope this helps.

Answer 4

lol wow, does you husband do this to you...just kidding around..normal couple flirting and such? Is this child allowed to watch TV shows that he shouldn't be able to watch?Im not assuming anything, im just asking questions that may help you think of the problem sourse and a solution.
If so, you guys may want to cut back on some of these things for a while...and for sure...do not let him watch movies or TV shows that have adult content in them.
This sounds like a learned behavior.Although, most children do become curious about these things.
I agree that your hubby needs to talk to him, it may sound better coming from dad.And if your hubby is in the room when the kid does it...dad needs to snatch him up and give him immediate correction.
You can also continue to talk to him about respecting you and other woman and how this is inappropriate behavior and that you will not stand for it.Maybe send him immediately to his room whenever he acts this way.
I think it his behavior isn't going to stop over night, it may take some time,but continue to do what you are doing and he will eventually learn.

Answer 5

OMG my brother did the same thing cept he did it when he was 3 (Do to my ******** of a father )anyway if he trys to touch ur chest i would just slap his hand and tell him thats private property or sumthing like that ..and just by telling him to be respectful to women and to be approprite won't really do anything cause he's only 7 so u could take away his video games or whatever he likes away for a week whenever he does it or talks about or whatever he does

Answer 6

Tell your husband to quit being a sexist bore in front of the kid. What's he gonna look like when the kid says something like that at school and gets put out for sexual harassment?

Next time he says something like that to you, go old school and make him write, "I will not call my step-mother sexy" 500 times.
Better yet, have your husband do it 250 times and the kid the other 250.

Put your foot down and teach that boy some manners before someone else does it for you.

Answer 7

Oh sheesh, buy him a barbie that he can touch the little hard boobies on! Honestly, it's purely inquisitiveness and has NOTHING to do with your state of attractiveness. He probably doesn't even understand the word sexy. Or maybe you don't. Try understanding the word "sexy" as "belonging to a particular sex". Would you be offended if he called you a female? That is sex.

I also don't understand much of the culture that concludes that women's breasts are meant only for adult men. They were placed on women's bodies for the sole purpose to feed infants.

Answer 8

ground him if he doesn't stop. Be firm and treat him strictly so he knows it's wrong. I'd say he might have learned this behaviour from someone else, another adult he hangs around with and a female who acts if she appreciates it. Is it just you or does he do it with him class teacher as well. Just be firm and let him hang around with other kids his age, instead of watching tv. Behaviour of others sually rub off and I don't think most 7 yearo ld act like that.

Answer 9

I recommend that you be direct, clear, and firm with the child. If he makes inappropriate comments about you, you need to square off with him, look him in the eye and tell him, "It is NOT ok for you to be speaking to me in that way, it is disrespectful, inappropriate and not ok!" And tell him the consequenses, "If you make remarks like that again, you will be sent to your room for a time-out" (I suggest 1 minute for every year old he is).

I also suspect you may have other parental management issues with the child. I recommend you read 1-2-3 Magic. I have recommended it many times to many people, it is easy to implement and works very well.

Good luck!!

Answer 10

Where has he learned this behavior? Has your husband called you "sexy" in front of your step-son? If this is the case (and even if it isn't) make sure you don't use terms like that in front of your step-son.

Of course, we all know the word "sexy" isn't a cuss word or anything like that but I think that's the impression you need to give your step-son. "Sexy" is not an appropriate word for a child to say and it should be dealt with just like you would deal with him saying f*** or b****.

When he says it, discipline him. Take away a priveledge, wash his mouth out with soap, spank him, etc. Do whatever you think is appropriate.