My ex and I dated for over 4 years before we broke up. We grew up together, shared the same friends, and were college sweethearts. We were each other's first loves and I truly thought he was "the one." Our relationship wasn't perfect though, and after I moved across the country for school, our problems became harder to fix. Ultimately we broke up because we just weren't happy anymore. It's been over 3 years since we broke up and we are now seeing other people. My current bf is wonderful and we've even talked about marriage in the future. The problem is, after all these years I still can't stop thinking about my ex. We shared so much together and I really miss the good parts of our relationship. When we broke up, I felt like I lost my best friend. We tried staying in touch, but it was too painful. I know we broke up for a reason and I need to move on for the sake of my current bf and my sanity. But deep down I don't know if I ever truly got over him. How do I move on?
2007-01-01 13:04:00 · 3 answers · asked by Jane 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Obviously he is not "the one". Be thankful that you have realized this now and not in twenty years. Just go out and have fun with the one you are with you never know. He may really be "the one".
2007-01-01 13:08:02 · answer #1 · answered by Laura L. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is really wonderful that you experienced love. I can tell you, you never do forget that kind of experience, especially when it formed much of your current personality and preferences. Seeing that it was your teen years, you probably experienced extreme emotional highs and lows with this person too, which as an adult, you don't quite go through again!
I suggest you take a private day or two, and pack up all momentos and reminders, and seal it closed. Put it in the attic or somewhere in deep storage, out of reach. Then make a list of what the relationship gave you, (art, music, sexual confidence, etc,) and what differences made you break up.
Take this paper and burn it, while focusing on saying good-bye, and wishing him well, and asking to be released from him emotionally. Do not do this lightly; using ceremony to say good-bye can be a very healing process.
When you come home, write out what you really really need in a marriage partner. Then carry this on your person. Maybe you could roll it up into a container that fits on your keychain. (In my area they sell prayerboxes). Everytime you see that object, you will think of what you are NOW looking for.
I wish you every happiness.
2007-01-01 21:52:29 · answer #2 · answered by realjustice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if you broke up then shes not the one
2007-01-01 21:05:44 · answer #3 · answered by soccerqt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋