All my life it's been my mom and I. Now, I'm 19. I'd never been away from home, but now I'm away at college! I have a boyfriend in the same town as my mom. I come home about two or three times a month. And I do spend a lot of time with him ( we planning on marriage after school) and she keeps sending messages that I'm ignoring her or being mean towards her... I don't understand.
I don't know if it's because I really don't need her as much as I did when I was a child ..or what. Can you help?
2007-01-01 11:35:24 · 11 answers · asked by Queen 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
#1 she is missing you terribly. Though you are happy and want to be independent i.e. seeing your boyfriend, away at school, making all the living on your own decisions, your Mom feels lonely and is alone. For 19 years she knew where you were, mostly, she was there for most of your decisions, all of your school years. She was there for you since birth. She knew everything about you and now she doesn't. Not that that is bad, but it is different for her and will take time to adjust. She may need antidepressants depending on how bad it is for her. But she loves you still. When you come in town to see your boyfriend, see her, if only for a few minutes. Or if seeing her for a short time won't work, then call her and talk to her oftten. I think in time she will adjust, but it is very hard to have your only
child leave home let alone also have a boyfriend.
2007-01-01 11:43:49 · answer #1 · answered by minion 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a combination of both. Your mom misses you a great deal and is jealous because you are spending a lot of your time home with your boyfriend. Imagine how you would feel if you had a nice relationship with someone and all of a sudden they were taken away from you. Make her a larger part of your life. Maybe she could help you with your wedding plans- that might make her feel more important and needed!
2007-01-01 19:39:33 · answer #2 · answered by flirt6angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Awwww, try making some "mom" time...She misses you!!! I'm going through the same right now....My daughter and I dont live together and shes planning a wedding in June, so I dont see her as much....Call your mom and make some plans for lunch or shopping or just hanging out and talking...She will love it and you will feel better about it too...Good luck
2007-01-01 19:40:01 · answer #3 · answered by mary2148 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my children just grew up too. I have a son 22 and 19 and I was a single parent. They needed me for most of my life, now they dont, that is a big change. Until your mom fills the void shes gonna hurt.
give her a break.
2007-01-01 19:41:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
because she loves you and some mom's get empty nest syndrome when their children gwet older and they still look at them like they are their baby. She probably misses you being home and being in and out and sharing with her as now you are sharing with your boyfriend and she feels lonely and not important. Hope this helps. Send her a card...for just because....
2007-01-01 19:39:29 · answer #5 · answered by ariermagee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Considering she's your mum, she's bound to want to see you and perhaps she feels a little disowned because your always with your boyfriend. However, I do see where you are coming from. You want a life of your own and now, you have it! But maybe you should include your mum a little bit more. Perhaps visit her one a week as I'm sure she'll appreciate it.
Good Luck! =)
2007-01-01 19:40:49 · answer #6 · answered by angelfairy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is jealous and she is missing you too. The sad thing is you have grown up but she hasn't. You can go out into the world without your mom, but she can't carry on without you. she's experiencing the Empty Nest Syndrome ..........child leaving home.
2007-01-02 03:09:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your mother may be a little jealous. It is hard for a parent to let go of their children. I believe her jealousy is in all good intentions. I think it is really just a cry for attention that you guys used to have.
2007-01-01 19:39:26 · answer #8 · answered by Jfranc1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may not need her like you used to but she still needs you. She's your mom make time for her she won't always be there...and you will feel terrible for taking her for granted. MAKE THE TIME
2007-01-01 19:38:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's just how mothers feel. its probably very depressing for her since you dont spend AS MUCH time with her as before. if you were soooo close to her for so many years, then she would expect you to visit VERY often....right?
2007-01-01 19:41:27 · answer #10 · answered by topaz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋