I lost my mom when I was 11, Im 15 now. How can I get over the hurt?

Question

I didn't really see her much. I live with my dad. She got cancer when I was 7. She was supposed to die 2 months later, but lived for another 4 years. She had 11 tumors when she died. I can't get over the fact that she's gone. My brothers act like she never existed. I can't talk to my dad about it. I really don't talk to anybody about it. People dont understand. I need help!

Answer 1

I lost my Grandmother 43 years ago. I still miss her and think about her every day. And....you know what? I hope I NEVER forget or get over her!

Enjoy your thoughts and feelings......Just concentrate on the good stuff about her.

Answer 2

First, I am so sorry for your loss. Second, it is never easy to get over the "hurt" or pain when you lose a loved one. It is best that you talk to someone about it. You may find that if you do talk to your dad, you will find out some things about your mom that you did not know. A parent always has a connection to their children, a bond that is more powerful than anything. I am sure your mother thought of you every day, even when she was the most ill. You know, you can still talk with your mother............even though she is not on this earth, I am sure her spirit is still around you, and plus, remember this, you are her blood, she will be in you always. God Bless you, and I hope you find peace soon.

Answer 3

It sounds like the whole family has a lot of hurt feelings, & resentment. Don't be fooled by your brothers way of dealing with it. They are hurting as much as you are, & so is your Dad.
The best way to get over the pain is to talk about it.
I know, us guys don't like talking about our feelings, but you asked how to get over the hurt, & that really is the way to do it.

Talk to your Dad, & if he can't open up about it, point it out to him that everybody in the family is still feeling the pain of losing your mom. So he needs to get the whole family into a family councellor ASAP.

However, you can only point this out to your Dad & brothers. If they want to drown in their sorrows without any help there is nothing else you can do for them, but there is plenty you can do for yourself.
Find a sympathetic ear in someone else you may know. A pastor at your church, a councellor at school, or ideally a qualified grief councellor.
Whatever you do, make sure you talk it out with somebody. Keeping all of this stuff inside just makes it fester like a wound that never heals.
Hope you feel better soon.

Answer 4

You never really get over losing your mom...I lost my mom when I was in my mid 40s and not a day goes by that I dont think of her...Something will happen in my life that I want to share with her, and shes not there anymore...Talk to you dad about it...He may surprise you and be more understanding than you think...or, did your mom have a sister which would be your aunt? Maybe someone like that, huh? My heart goes out to you.

Answer 5

you need to know that she is looking down at you and that she doesn't want you to dwell, and probably would tell you that right now, but because she cant, you dont know this. but, you will probably get over this, and you could also talk to sum 1 too. neways, ur only 15 (though im only 14) and you have so much you can do in ur life. besides, if it helps, everyone dies, but it's just a matter of when the person dies.

Answer 6

You will NOT get over the loss of your mother. She was an important part of your life. You will continue to miss your mother the rest of your life. What I suggest you do is write down all the goodness of your mother and stick it into your wallet. When the loss starts to become painful,take out this writing and start reading it to yourself.It will help you immediately remember the good times with mother. Hopefully as the time goes by you will need to read the paper less
as the memory will overcome the start of the loss.

Answer 7

Please call the law enforcement officers! in case you do not want to call the law enforcement officers immediately, tell a counselor in college and that they can assist you including your situation. do not enable her abuse you anymore, as a results of fact no rely what somebody's toddler does, they don't should be abused as a punishment. no person would desire to ever starve as a results of fact they're too scared to bypass downstairs to the kitchen in concern of having hit. do not tell her to end or you will call the police, as a results of fact whether she does end as a results of fact of that, she nevertheless merits punishment for each and all of the abuse she positioned you thru for 15 years on the grounds which you have been 3! you would be able to nicely be waiting to bypass and stay with kinfolk individuals, yet very almost any situation is extra helpful than the single you're in ideal now.

Answer 8

Ouch. Yeah i live with my dad. My mom's just in the crazy house. Ok, ur mom didn't really leave. If you loved her, she's still in ur heart. Now u gotta make sure u don't do the same mistake. Take care of urself and go to skool. That's all I can say hon. Take care.

Answer 9

You could always see a Dr. They specialize in those situations. You shouldn't have to live with the hurt that bad for so long. She'll always be in your heart, but you shouldn't have to stress over it. Talk to a counseler, or Dr, and they can set you up with someone who has knowledge about your situation! I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 10

I think a good place to start would be by talking with your school counselor and seeing what help she can provide or who she can point you to with help for you.
Another good option is if you have an Aunt or Uncle that was close to your Mother. Maybe you want to get to know more about her and that might be healing for you and help you understand.

Answer 11

So sorry to hear that. What type of cancer did she have? You probaly need to see a counselor. What town do you live in? email me direct if you need to talk. It's gonna take forever to get over your moms death. But time will heal.