Is my g/f gonna be ok/?? Will she get over this??(see add'l details)
2007-01-01 08:30:40 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
She was raped by two close friends 6 months ago. We recently had sex(her idea) and since she has been really worked up. At night she will wake up crying. I want to help and went through this with her the first time it happened. Will she eventually get close to normal again?? I go with her to her consuling, but wonder what else I can do. I am willing to do anything to help her.
Please give some advice.
2007-01-01 08:30:54 · update #1
She was doing much better but now is back to square one. I won't leave her.
2007-01-01 08:34:40 · update #2
She told me everyting that happened. How else can I help??
2007-01-01 08:35:19 · update #3
When she cries I just hold her and listen. I just want to know how else I can help.
2007-01-01 08:37:09 · update #4
just do what you doing, stay by her side gave her love
she's not going to get over it now
2007-01-01 08:37:48 · answer #1 · answered by darkangel 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have a friend that got raped and she got over it in 1 year. Her boyfriend helped her by spending more time with her and hugging her in bed and for about 2 weeks having sex but without sexual intercourse, It help es because the woman feels more secure and safe. Then not having very fast and aggressive sex but maybe turning on some music having some champagne and then gust do it nice and slow so the she doesn't feel scared and doesn't think of the time that she got raped, and especially be gentle during sexual intercourse because during that period of time she can remember the pain that she had when she got raped. Talk to her when you are having sex and let her feel that you love her.Hope she gets better.
2007-01-01 16:47:33 · answer #2 · answered by Silvia D 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I hope the punks who did this to her are behind bars. Probably having sex with her so soon after she was raped didn't help. she will have to have counseling for awhile before she can feel comfortable with intimacy again. It is good that you are there to support her. A lot of women don't have this. She may never get over the initial crime that has been done to her. but with the help of support from you, family and counseling she will get better. I have a lot of respect for you doing what you are doing for her...keep it up she needs that. Best of luck to you and your girlfriend.
2007-01-01 16:41:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
geez, thats pretty heavy, but dont be suprised if she doesnt get over it. When a woman is raped, molested, or touched in any innapropriate way, it is the most ugliest feeling in the world. maybe when you guys had sex, it brought back images to her of what she went through. being raped is traumatizing. its hard for her, just hang in there and be as understanding as you can, remember us woman are very sensitive.
2007-01-01 16:36:33 · answer #4 · answered by Kr@zie♥Be@utiful 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, I think that having sex with her will just bring back bad memories of the rape incident. So the next time she suggests it, tell her how you feel, like that you are worried about her.
2007-01-01 16:34:26 · answer #5 · answered by Liz4600 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She will get over it...She just needs you by her side...
Be right next to her..
I think when she asked you to have sex, it was because she wanted to get rid of the horrible memory with something ...well,,u know ..good..
IT will take time, but she will be OK...as long as you be there.
So you..be patient..be loving, caring, tender, understanding,
I know itis alot..but believe me as long as u love her very much...u wont regret
2007-01-01 16:34:54 · answer #6 · answered by BonBon 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
All you can do is keep being supportive. Encourage her to make some new friends and try some new activities. I think she needs to make some changes in her lifestyle (and definitely create a new circle of friends). This might help her get over her past. Also, please pray for her!
2007-01-01 16:36:12 · answer #7 · answered by ahhihello 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
who knows whatll happen? if it was her idea she probly healed or thot she'd healed. maybe it was 2 soon....some people get confused. but that...experience may hav reminded her of what happened 2 her and it freaked her out. it may take a while 4 her 2 heal.
good luck.
2007-01-01 16:34:43 · answer #8 · answered by J@YDI$$L3 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hold her close. my 3 friends hav been raped by there close friends 2. i help them threw it by asking them to do stuff. help them get there mind off it. good luck . she will get better but there will still be memories. ~<3
2007-01-01 16:34:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's hard, but you have to stay with her, she really needs you but doesn't know how to explain it right now. It will never go away but she will soon be able to face it. Did she go to a doctor?
2007-01-01 16:33:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
hey from one chick whoes been raped also twice, to the sensitive guy whoes trying his hardest to help..........
Just be there for her, let her know you care and that your sorry for what she's been through....... take her on walks (it'll clear her mind) hey try meditation...... it helps me, but she'll never completely be over it she can move past it and be stronger for it, but she'll be okay don't worrie just be there for her in her hour of need aight.....
still dreaming in idaho
stacy m day
2007-01-01 16:37:05 · answer #11 · answered by Stacy ` B 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋