I'm 16 years old. I have a boyfriend. He recently told me that he "accidentally" kissed a girl, and that was the point he realized that he had major love for me. So my whole attitude was nonchalant and I was mad as well. So, me being mad I said some things like I was going to break up with him. And, I hung up in his face, he called me back "crying," talking about please dont leave him. And before I thought I loved him, well I think I do, but it's like after he told me that he wouldn't know what to do and that he'd probably kill himself if me and him were to breakup, I kind of want to back out. I'm kind of having second thoughts about this boy. I mean I've known him since I was 12, but I never heard him speak of anything like this. And, I dont know if this has any connections, but his mom is dead as well, and I wonder is that kind of tying into how he feels..
2007-01-01 07:51:57 · 20 answers · asked by Danyizzle 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You guys are so very young and having a relationship at this age there's bound to be drama
Talk to someone close to him about his threats to hurt himself...he could be serious.
Maybe this isn't the best relationship for you at this time....at 16 there's a lot going on here.
2007-01-01 07:56:21 · answer #1 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he has been in ur life since 12. Sounds like a reality check from f up and an insecurity issue from loss of mother. I would suggest you try and remain his friend, but shoot straight about this major weakness and prob major turn off to one your age. We women usually prefer manly men not babies. though becuz he has these feelings does not mean he is not going to be a manly man in time. as a matter of fact these type realizations will make him man up at a younger age and this happens usually later or too late in a boy's life. I think you should put some distance between u 2, but u have to be straight up and firm, or it will be nothing more than a kiddy game. You sound a little more mature than that, by even asking opinions on the matter. He needs u and as a friend, u shoud be there. But as a friend to u ...he needs to shake the Killing himself BS. And as they say, if he is speaking of killing himself, chances are he is Not going to." A cry for help" The ones that actually go through with this type action do not give anyone a chance to save them. They quietly do it.
2007-01-01 08:04:10 · answer #2 · answered by porchpup552003 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would he do that. Wow this is a tough one! Umm. Well Talk to him in person. See how he reacts. Does he act the same way on the phone? Or is he acting like it's no big deal? You've known him since you were 12? Wow! that's pretty cool. Anyways, what is your instinct? Do you feel Sorry because he needs someone? Well, he did tell you the truth. But again he shouldn't be kissing someone else behind your back. Not good in a relationship like that. You need to get him to tell you the facts, why he did it, what was he thinking, and what does he want to do to fix his mistake. Listen with an open mind. All in all, he can't be cheating on you. You can't be stuck in a toxic relationship, and you just being a shoulder to lean on. I say break up with him, but go with what You feel is right.
Best of Luck!
2007-01-01 08:02:53 · answer #3 · answered by Quizgrl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
parents have a strong influence on their kids so if his mom commited suicide then he probably wouldnt think twice about and see it as an escape from his life. making a mistake like wat he did really does show how much you care about a girl. i accidnetly kissed another girl and when i felt no regret towards it i realized i no longer loved my girlfriend the way i once thought i did. then on another "incident" when i accidently kissed a girl at a party i realized how much i truly loved my girl and i would never do anything like that again to hurt her and at that moment the same thoughts came across my mind about wat i would do without her and if it did come to a break up then how could i live without her?
maybe the best thing for you to do is talk to him tell him you still care about him but you need some time to think about wat just happened and if hes real or not. just make sure you let him know that you care or else he'll think that a gun to the head would be the quickest way out of all the drama
2007-01-01 08:00:07 · answer #4 · answered by Matt Koz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hopefully, he's only saying that to get your attention and to get you to not break up with him. I personally avoid saying things like, "I would die without you" and stuff like that to my boyfriend. You need to leave him, Sweetie. If your whole relationship is going to be a guilt trip to stay with him, how great could that be? It will make you miserable in the meantime. He'll get over it. Just be careful and if you really think he may do this, talk to whoever he lives with or authorities and get him put in a hospital. That kind of obsession is very unhealthy.
2007-01-01 07:57:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
GET BACK WITH HIM! He needs u and he is begging u. u have known him for a long time and he just lost his mother he needs a feminine love now that his mom has left. I know he did not mean 2 hurt ur feelings. And u luv him. DONT LEAVE HIM HE NEEDS U !
2007-01-01 07:59:55 · answer #6 · answered by Hottie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what does your mom being passed have to do with him. you need to tell an adult that you trust about what is going on and let god find a way to get out of the relationship. the relationship is not helpping either one of you. i can see that it is great he told you, but you don't accidentally kiss anyone! then maybe you could accidentally stop calling him.
2007-01-01 07:57:48 · answer #7 · answered by Candace C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would not stay with someone because I felt responsible to take care of them.... he is responsible for his own feelings and he needs to do things to take care of himself and make himself feel better. I don't know enough to know if the kiss is a big deal- did he have a relationship with this girl? If it was a spur of the moment thing, I would not be that concerned about it (we all make mistakes and he is not MARRIED to you). If you are in love with him, then be with him. If you are not in love with him, then move on and find someone who makes you feel good about yourself because you are so happy and excited to be with him. Good luck!
2007-01-01 07:58:17 · answer #8 · answered by laura c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is trying to manipulate you by threatening suicide and calling you while "crying".
He is still grieving over his mom's death, and clearly has issues about fear of being abandoned again.
Encourage him to go to his school counselor, who can talk to his dad and help to arrange professional counseling, which this boy desperately needs.
If he won't go, see YOUR counselor, who can take steps to help him through the proper channels.
2007-01-01 08:03:48 · answer #9 · answered by boogeywoogy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as though he really likes you and made an innocent mistake. And he was honest and told you, he did not have to tell you anything. I certainly hope he was just talking out of his pain, I hope he is not serious about killing himself. You should address this with him and tell him, that he should never make statements as such, they can be taken very seriously. Good luck and God bless****
2007-01-01 07:56:15 · answer #10 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋