well... i ve got a gurl .. we r best friends ... but she has kind of phobia! something like relationship phobia !!!!!!! she have some bad memorise from her ex-bf and they broke up 4 years back ... but she is afraid of any serious relationship ...
she says she loves me and its to hard for her if i leave her
what can i do ?:( i realy love her
im confused :(
no childish answer
2007-01-01 01:40:54 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
im 22 and she s 20.
its about two years we r together.
2007-01-01 01:52:10 · update #1
you need to let her know how you feel more often then in usual relationships.
One thing I did was to have a journal and if there is something that either of you can't say then you write it down. Lack of comunication is the best way for her fear to control her. If the fear stays then she will run.
make sure that if there is anything on her mind no matter how silly it may seem that she gets it out... email, writing, telling a 3rd party, or set up a time both of you can talk to each other everyday.
I'm not sure what her phobia is, but I am alone because I push every man away. I know what to do now just too scared to try.
whatever you do don't let her go.
2007-01-01 01:49:28 · answer #1 · answered by kerry9477 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The only thing you can do - if you love her is to wait. You don't say how long you have been together because this will make a difference. If it is a long time then you obviuosly can't wait around forever but if you have only been dating a few months she will need to learn how to trust you. You say you are best friends perhaps you could ease up on the relationship side of things and just enjoy each others company without the pressure of being in a proper relationship.
2007-01-01 01:47:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not trying to be funny but if you have been with this girl for the last 2 years she should be well over her last boyfriend, And one good thing that I read is your besfriends thats really good but bfs trust each other I don't think that the phobia shold be there with you. She needs to realize that you are not going t do what her last did t the same time I think she knows that but it is probley a excuse to not further you and her in futher comminet. other then that I really don't know what to tell you!
2007-01-01 02:25:52 · answer #3 · answered by tonyad143 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I've been this girl before. She's testing you because she's been hurt badly before - she's affraid it will happen again. Who knows how long it will take but if you stick around and prove you care for her and love her and wont leave her she'll come around and love you forever. she probably already loves you but is too scared to act on it because of the fear of getting burned. Just be patient. Best of luck.
2007-01-01 01:42:49 · answer #4 · answered by Carrie 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her and reassure her..have lots of patience and be ready to wait. If she is worth it she'll come around. Love is very powerful and will bring her to you if its meant to be. Bad relationships can leave deep scars and then we (as Girls) dont trust guys with that part of our lives. You will have to show her that you love her and show her you are different.
Good luck and again HAVE PATIENCE!!!!!
2007-01-01 01:44:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Give her sometime to develop trust in you. And also some space so to show that you respect her feelings and care for her. You said u r best friends and so I guess she expects u to understand and not rush things...
2007-01-01 01:47:28 · answer #6 · answered by cool_cancer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You you need to reassure her that you are not that guy that broke her heart and it is not fair for her to take it out on you. You have not hurt her and will love her past her pain. If she can't trust you your relationship will not grow. If she can't get past her pain and trust you, she needs to be the one to let you go. That is not fair to you to keep you hanging on.
2007-01-01 01:46:57 · answer #7 · answered by ♦ Phoenix Rising♦ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Happy New Years
2007-01-01 01:46:42 · answer #8 · answered by got_shots 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
just be yourself and give her the time she needs , maybe she is not ready for a new relationship.
Have you talked to her about it ? What went on in the relationship ,that makes her to be so afraid?
2007-01-01 01:44:20 · answer #9 · answered by silverearth1 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you really love this girl just do it,give enough attention maybe now she's on the stage of adjustment
2007-01-01 01:47:14 · answer #10 · answered by chicklet 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋