What is the cause of shyness?

Question

why are some people more shy and reticent than others? i go through stages of shyness, some days it is worse than others and some days i won't even answer the door if i can avoid it.

why though?

i think i have always been like it, i mean i used to hide behind my parents when someone came round to see them.

I wouldn't really like to take a drug for it though aren't there other more natural ways?

Answer 1

Because just like many people in society, you care what they think, which is your biggest mistake. It's ok to care what the boss thinks, afterall, he/she pays your salary, but to care what the others think is ridiculous.

Being a courteous, pleasant and generally nice person is all you need to worry about in life. Follow the golden rule "treat others as you would have them treat you". Do this and never care what they think of you. Love and accept yourself for you. Have confidence in your abilities, then you'll have confidence in picking the right people as friends and partners, for they will also love you for you.

Answer 2

Shyness could possibly be genetic thing, and I can be shy too sometimes, but I think its just one of those things you hve to leanr to overcome naturally, it might sound daunting, but if it is affecting your everyday life, you should consult a psychotherapist to talk through the triggers of your shyness, maybe then you will be able to see when those triggers are arising and keep a diary of your shy episodes so you know how you could go about imrpovingyour self-esteem and confidence, cause at the end of the day that's what it boils down to.
Hope this helps. In the words of Morrissey of The Smiths "Shyness is nice, but shyness can stop you from doing all the things in life you'd like to" bear that in mind :)

Answer 3

It is very much a low self esteem thing. Start reading self-help books. The first one I would recommend is " How to win friends and influence people" It is by, I think, someone called Carniege, or something like that. Any good book store will have it in stock, or will be able to order it for you. This book will change your whole outlook on life and explain how to handle your mind-set in almost any situation. It is fantastic and changed me completely. Another book would be "Feel the fear and do it anyway". But you can guess from the title what that tells you to do.
Good luck. You can get over this, but only if you want to. While you are waiting to get this book try this simple little exercise: Next time you are out walking on your own, walk 20% faster than you do and keep your shoulders back and head up. You will start to feel the difference already. I promise! Happy new year.

Answer 4

Shyness is a character trait that you developed at a young age. However, you sound like you may have an anxiety disorder - (not wanting to answer the door) - which causes you to avoid contact with others, especially large crowds. I have been like that for years, and finally I told my doctor and he recommended EFFEXOR, an anti-anxiety/depression medicine. It has made a big difference, and I am more social than I have been in years. I don't know what causes shyness, but if your condition bothers you, tell your doctor - there may be something he/she can do. Best wishes for a Bright and Happy Year!

Answer 5

I'm with u on this one. Wish I knew. Previously what I read was that it was a low confidence thing. However recently there were some studies showing that it may have a genetic connection, that is it may be inherited, it has to do with receptors in the brain that make some people extra sensitive to cues and stimuli from others.

Answer 6

There are multiple kinds of disorders that deal with anxiety. Although most can manifest in similar ways, these disorders generally occur due to different events in your life. Natural home remedies for anxiety https://tr.im/U3Pz7
Generalized anxiety disorder includes persistent and unnecessary worries about everyday, common events or activities, which can disrupt concentration and lead to other issues, such as depression.

Answer 7

it has to do with your confidence. i have the same problem with shyness. mine was caused when i was kid.... i Had what i thought were great friends and in the end they all stabbed me in the back after they were done using me for entertainment and helping them with their homework. i eventually got over it but when it happened again i now find it hard to trust anyone. now that i look at myself im sure im very hard to approach at a party or something because i look uptight and well.... unapproachable. sometimes i want to say something but cant.... ya know.... like the words dont just come out. thankfully my sister hangs out with me alot (older sis... boy do i love her) and whenever im around her i seem to be able to let loose. i sometimes dont like to answer the door or the telephone either but im getting better at it. my sister keeps trying to get me to take risks. problem with risks is there a chance youre get hurt.... but im still trying.

i wish you luck in trying to gain more confidence. have a great new year and i hope that this helped.

Answer 8

Eliminate Social Anxiety Shyness - http://SocialAnxiety.uzaev.com/?WXZF

Answer 9

Shyness is fear, usually caused through an inability to confront, especially what one may consider another persons thoughts maybe about one. Remedy- learn to confront that which is.

Answer 10

I think some of it is personality. Some people just have more outgoing personalities than others. I know what you mean, though, sometimes I am much more willing to "put myself out there" than others.