If so what do I do?
Do I bluntly tell her she's a snore to converse with or what? I just don't know what to do. She's my life and I love her to death she's my soulmate I swear it...
but I find that I've had way more interesting conversations with my ex boyfriend who I fell in love (but not more) with in the past. Its really bad. Ive never had to roll my eyes or trail off into space or just plain hold the phone away from my ear until I think she's done yapping away.
What the hell do I do in a rutt like this one? I love her to death but sometimes when she runs on into her stories I find myself snoring...
Coz she sounds like the Charlie Brown teacher...no offense but I really wanna fix it. I'm going to be spending the rest of my life with her and I don't want this to continue after we're married.
2006-12-31 17:59:08 · 15 answers · asked by Snooglez 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
How ur relationship made it this far, I am amazed, you must have found something she had to say interesting to have even had a relationship in the first place.
2006-12-31 18:14:52 · answer #1 · answered by melark 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know that you can "fix it", and I don't know that you should even if you can. It sounds like you're wanting to change a major aspect of her. That's usually not a good sign, especially if it's something as basic as this.
If I were you, I would consider carefully my true feelings and how okay I am with spending the rest of my life with that person. Ask yourself why you want to stay with her, and the answer "I love her" does not count.
You can love someone with all your heart, but maybe this girl isn't the soulmate you think she is. It seems to me that soulmates connect on a deep level and therefore have a lot to talk about. If she bores you to tears everytime she opens her mouth, that kind of flies in the face of the soulmate claims.
If we were talking about how you don't want to have her smoke or drink or not clean the bathrooms occasionally or some other thing, I can see how you'd "not want this to continue after you're married." But the language you chose to use there implies that you're placing a measure of blame on her for not being interesting to you, and it's a personality flaw she needs to work on. It's not a flaw. Regardless of how much you say you love her, to expect that she needs to change her level of interestingness (I have no other idea of what word to use here) is unfair to her.
2006-12-31 18:14:30 · answer #2 · answered by CrazyChick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a dear friend that affects me the same way, and the sad thing it is getting worse and worse. I can set the phone down, go use the bathroom,come back and she is still talking and clueless that I hadn't been on the phone for 5 minutes.
Maybe you should take a break from her for awhile. That is about the only advice I can give you. I had to take some time off from my friend and it has helped somewhat.
Did I get that right that you used to have a boyfriend you were in love with but now you are engaged to be married to a girl? o judgment intended, just curious if I read that right.
M
2006-12-31 18:04:11 · answer #3 · answered by maamu 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not wrong. Its good you are feeling this right now. You are not married yet it's not too late to end the relationship. Please don't get married if you are bored by her ALREADY!!!
But on the other hand some people become very nervous and scared when they know they are going to get married soon and they start to question the relationship and find problems that weren't there before because they (unconsciously) want to find them.
So:
If what she says REALLY does seem boring to you and you know it's not only because you are scared because you know you will have to spend the rest of your life with this girl then you should tell her that as soon as possible.
2006-12-31 18:07:33 · answer #4 · answered by dang-duh! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't quite figure out the logistics here. It appears that you are a male engaged to a female but prefers the company of his former partner who is also a male.
In any case, it doesn't matter. It is clear you don't love her. Cancel the engagement. When you've been married five or fifty years, it is normal to be irritated by the way your spouse acts, but if this is happening so early in your relationship, you should end it as fast as possible. Don't listen to any protestations about I can change, end it. It's not fair to your fiance or to yourself to enter into such a marriage.
If you were sure of your love, you wouldn't be asking for advice on such a public and ill-informed forum as Yahoo Answers.
2006-12-31 18:05:23 · answer #5 · answered by tfedge 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't change people. She is the way she is and if you can't love her 100% then maybe you need to really think about how it will be spending the rest of your life with her. People don't change and it's not fair for you to expect her to change just to suit what you think is exciting.
2006-12-31 18:02:02 · answer #6 · answered by Rawrrrr 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my boyfriend is so bad at talking... maybe you arren't meant to be with her. im sorry that sounds so mean but its true... can you imagine spending the rest of your life zoning out every time a conversation starts!?
2006-12-31 18:04:18 · answer #7 · answered by Maybe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like... your not as in love as you thought.......
maybe you should re-evaluate your relationship and figure out if this is someone you really wanna be with...
do you really want to jump into marriage and then end up adding to the divorce rate of america?
2006-12-31 18:00:55 · answer #8 · answered by USCfemme10 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like 1) you've not completely get over your ex. 2) you wanted to change her to be like your ex, r u sure that you really love her or are you using her as your temporary security blanket?
2006-12-31 18:13:56 · answer #9 · answered by Dreamweaver 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like you are more interested in what your ex has to say so maybe you should re-evaluate who you want to be with..
2007-01-01 03:18:10 · answer #10 · answered by Byakuya 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋