To all the people who have answered let me just say my husband is not nice.He has always been controlling and were 17 years apart.He acts more as if he's my father than my husband.He's not lovey and caring.Everything i do is always wrong.I told him I'm leaving and he want's to be sweet for a minute.Then he's yelling at me for who knows what,not necessarily screaming,just being loud.I want a divorce because last week he yelled at me for the last time,and for years I gave it back to him but he doesn't care.I'm always wrong.Well now I'm taking my kids going on welfare finishing school and I don't want him to down me any more I am going to make it,I am alone with my kids but I was so alone with him.I never loved him and I only have me to blame for being a coward and staying so long.But the choice of saying it's easier to stay here than to try and be without a little bit- no i really don't like him at all. He's done nothing but hurt me emotionally and now God willing I'm going to go 4ever!
2006-12-31 14:25:28 · 26 answers · asked by pookie 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
good for you!! i hope you make it
no one deserves to be unhappy,
check with your local DHS for information on the other things you may be eligible for
good luck and happy living
2006-12-31 14:34:54 · answer #1 · answered by mother of teenagers 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Divorce him and split up!!! Have a friend or family member help out if you feel like you can't do it on your own. He's making you unhappy and soon it will probably get violent. The sweet act is just something to keep you around. Think about this. Would you rather divorce him and be rid of the yelling and controlling or stay and endure it? Also think about your kids. They would be scared. Leave him because he has nothing to offer. Find somebody that would treat you better.
2006-12-31 22:32:44 · answer #2 · answered by babyapplepie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ummm...i have a question.....how'd you end up with four kids? Did you think the world needed your contribution that badly? Oh...and now go ahead and break up what little fraction of a normal family unit you had. Absolutely, do whats best for you. In that entire paragraph, not one mention of what might be best for your kids. Anyone can have children.....but I have to have a license to own a dog. What B.S. Oh,,,and there are droves of men out there just waiting for the right girl with four kids to come along. C'mon, you're leaving because your husband of 13 years isn't "lovey". And you're such a prize that you'll do better elsewhere? Get a grip. Why not go on welfare so that I can help support you and your kids because you made shi tty choices in life. Try taking reponsibility for your own actions, setting a good example.. and raise your kids to be less of a moron than you. Many thanks from all the hard working single people with no kids who are tired of feeding, clothing and educating yours. Where's my tax credit for not burdening society with my baggage?
2006-12-31 22:32:42 · answer #3 · answered by questionable reality 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
is this a question or a statement? i understand you completely. when a professional explained to me about head games,i started to cry because i had let another person that i trusted with all my secrets use and abuse me,like your just like your daddy,nobody likes you,why don't you have any friends,if your IQ was 60 i would be shocked;hey i thought 60 out of 100 wasn't bad.any way we had 6 kids and one day another man stole her away,but he brought her back with a broken heart,but guess what,as far as i was concerned,she wasn't any good any more and i made her divorce me,so the kids would know it was her and not me.when we went to court they gave her everything,and later on she dumped the kids on me because she knew i did a better job than she did.you may not know what you want,but you sure know what you don't want.i wish you all the luck in the world,and do not judge all men by that one,there are some like me still out there.
2006-12-31 22:47:32 · answer #4 · answered by m.w.meredith@sbcglobal.net 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Go now. Get out of there and never look back. You deserve better. You can make it without him. I was in a situation like yours and I got the hell out. I have NEVER regretted leaving him at all, not even for a second. Now I have the greatest hubby in the world and I am VERY happy. Good Luck to you. Go pack your things NOW!!!!!
It takes courage and strength but you can do it!!!!
2006-12-31 22:29:26 · answer #5 · answered by I know, I know!!!! 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's good your getting out of a bad relationship. I commend you for taking steps in a positive direction. The days ahead will be trying but you won't have to live with all of his controlling put downs. Life will be a breeze with out hearing all the negative. Others will fill you with positive thoughts and ideas. Go for it. You deserve it. Good Luck and God Speed!
2006-12-31 22:30:10 · answer #6 · answered by fluer_ball 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
All I can say is- Wow! It takes a lot of courage to leave even the worst of marriages. I wish you the best of luck, and all the strength you'll need. You have taught your children to not back down to tyrants. No one should have to live in a war zone.
2006-12-31 22:35:59 · answer #7 · answered by Tanyaqt 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain! As you do what you must, remember this--the kids ALWAYS LOSE in a divorce, unless there' abuse that they are being taken out of.
If you start it, be prepared to go through with it.
TRY to line up a healthy support system for yourself and your children for the time of transition. Best of luck!
2006-12-31 22:30:55 · answer #8 · answered by Dorothy and Toto 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is a coward for treating you that way for so long. He was just using you. You deserve so much better. Leave him, go back to school, spend time with your kids, try and start a new family.. Good luck Ive got faith you can do it. :P
2006-12-31 22:31:04 · answer #9 · answered by blazin_cripz_2006_0wner.sheena 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
OMG, we must have the same husband! I started seeing a counselor a few months ago for this very reason. It's been helping quite a bit. Go for yourself, you deserve to feel good about yourself. Even if he won't go with you in order to preserve your marriage, you'll benefit from it. I've noticed a change already, even though my husband is deciding not to work as much in our marriage as I am. Your husband has some emotional issues, and in turn he's taking them out on you, and you've put up with it for too long. You've let him feel he is allowed to treat you like garbage and you don't deserve it! Stand up for yourself and do not allow him to treat you like a child. Act like an adult with him and he'll have no choice but to treat you like one. Even when he gets really pushy with you and tries to get you under his thumb, keep your composure. If you're not willing to work on the marriage with him anymore, get out. A happily divorced mom is much better for kids than an unhappily married one.
2006-12-31 22:35:11 · answer #10 · answered by chamely_3 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't do it hunny... You can persevere and get through this...
The worst thing is to leave him.. Unless he's abusing you then there's no reason for you to get out of the relationship.. you both are in this together... take him out on a date and talk to him one on one... But my best advice would be to just talk to Jesus and pray that He will sort out this marriage because he can.. He's greater than any marriage counsellor, He is the best one I can ever suggest to you.. If you need any prayer or just need someone to talk to , because I KNOW that you can get through this!!! Trust me! There's a light at the end of the tunnel.. do it for the kids and for your marriage.. Your kids NEED a father..and its so great you're persevering keep on persevering..!! You can do ittt!!!! I know you can!!!
Blessings hunny and if you need to talk and want to get through this.. then email me at
thecross_mylife@hotmail.com
ANYTIME.. blessings darling..
Have a great new years eve! Expect this new year to be a great year for your marriage!
2006-12-31 22:34:44 · answer #11 · answered by Mickey 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋