what would u do??

Question

i think im going into depreesion! what should i do? i think its because my mom is real strict on me and she hardly lets me out of our house. i only go to school and come home and maybe sometimes go and stay with my grandma. its like that because i told her when i was 13 i smoked grass with my cousin. but i was honest to tell her before she found out on her own. and now that im 16 i dont get to do nothing! my relatives try to tell her that she's too strict on me but my moms old-fashioned
does anybody have any suggestions on what i should do to earn her trust

Answer 1

"i told her when i was 13 i smoked grass with my cousin. but i was honest to tell her before she found out on her own."

This implies that you know she would have found out and you headed it off at the pass to come clean so you could limit the trouble you would get into. That does not build trust in someone's honesty. To a parent, it implies poor choices and trying to limit it's implications of being caught. It is inot the same as coming up to a parent and saying:

"Mom.. I screwed up and made a decision to do something I knew wasn't right. Now I regret not being stronger and choosing the right thing to do for myself."

If you want to build trust then it means doing the right thing for yourself when you have choices to do otherwise. You are old enough to get a job part time if your grades in school are fair to midland or better. Show her you are taking steps to do things that mean you are learning the lessons needed to handle life on your own and make good choices. What you spend your money on to will help support devleloping maturity.... like saving money for insurance and for a car,etc... not just CD's and makeup and outfits.

If not a job then sports or school activites as others have mentioned. Help around the house without being asked to do something also shows a willingness to do what's right. So basicly prove by your actions that you are ready to be trusted. rather than just by words. Your actions in the past had an equal impact on what she believes so you already know that is important to her.

Use the same tactics to show her you are ready. In my house, priveledges given follow the levels responsibilities assumed.

Answer 2

It sounds like your mom is afraid that you are going to get in trouble. You where very brave to be so honest with your mom, she should be proud of her self for making you feel open enough to tell her. The best way you can get some king of social anything is if you do it through school......so here is the plan....See if you can join a soccer team, drama club, reading or writing club or any after school activity. This will give you some time to hang out with some new friends and it also looks good when you are active in your school stuff. Keep asking your mom what is it you can do to gain her trust, and don't give up.....make sure you let her know that you'll never do it gain (and don't smoke pot okay). Try the school stuff it really works.

PS. don't give up, she loves you! and wants to keep you close to her... she does not realize you is just pushing you away....she I'll hope will do a little growing up too!

Smile

Answer 3

its the exact same thing with my mom except i never did anything to betray her trust. you can try 2 have 1 of your relatives talk some sense into her but honestly i don't think it would do any good. Tell your mom how you feel and how her rules are affecting you maybe she will realize what her rules r doing 2 u.

Answer 4

I was in your shoes once. The only thing I can suggest is to talk to your mom about it, like adults. Suggest a probationary period of going out with guidelines. If she won't budge, you only have a few years of living with her to go. It's her house, and she is really looking after your best interests, she's scared she will lose you. She loves you, and this is maybe the only way she knows how to show it. Good luck.

Answer 5

Try talking to her....gently tell her how you feel.
Try opening the door for communication.
(Don't point fingers and say why Can't you or why are you so
old fashion.)
Maybe start by joining school activities and see how that goes...open the door slowly and start to rebuild that trust.

I think it was wonderful that you were honest with her and I also understand that she is just trying to protect you....so take it slowly and see what happens.

Best wishes