I am 18 years old and my boyfriend is 27, do you think that is a huge age gap?

Question

Well i am 18years old and my boyfriend is 27, i am in college and he has a great career in business.
We don't really get along and most time i feel as though, we're just in this realtionship for sex, cause we do have great sex together. But we have been together for 1year and 5months, and i find it difficult to understand why we are not much closer in this relationship.
I do love him very much, but i am scared to tell my parents that i am seeing him. I am so confused, dont know what to do.
By the way he left me here for the new years and he's with his sister and her family for the new years. Does that mean that he don't really love me? And he's just using me?

Answer 1

The age gap is quite big but then it should never really be an issue if you truly love someone. Age should never make an difference. However saying that, there are obviously problems in this relationship. The sex is great and there's plenty of it by the sound of it but not much else and you don't even get on.

You need to ask yourself a couple of questions. Is having great sex worth being in a relationship where things are not 100% and there is a lack of true happiness? You've been seeing him well over a year and still haven't told your parents. This would say to me that you are not proud of the fact that you are with him and for whatever reason, you feel your parents would not approve. So maybe you need to give it some serious thought.

Don't be used for sex even if it's good sex. You are better than that and could have good sex with someone special in a loving relationship with all that comes with it and also be able to tell your parents and not have all the secretism.

Sounds like this relationship is very unstable with just one thing holding it together. SEX. Is that enough? It wouldn't be for me but then I am not you and only you know that answer deep down.

I wish you luck in whatever you decide.

Best wishes,

M xx

Answer 2

I actually don't see a problem with this at this Age.. if it was more along the lines of you being like 13 and him being like 20 then i guess you can worry. Based upon what you have said i do feel if that you have been together for this long and that you don't know him as much you would like.. personally you're in it for the sex. I was with a girl for a year and 2 Months and to be honest we were 2 totally different people! I am a very loud, outgoing and approachable character.. whereas she liked to keep herself to herself and didnt really want to go out that much, although we did have sex on a regular basis and i think it was mainly the thought of us 2 not finding anyone new if we split.. but i thinkt he sex was keeping us together.. it took alot of moaning from my friends and kissing another girl to decide it was time for a change.. although the age gap wasn't as bad as this.. i could go into stories of relationships i have had about age gaps.. but i won't go into too much detail..I would say the best thing to do is confront him about it.. say you would like to get to know him a little more.. maybe try new things.. go out to different places... it can help :)
Good Luck
Danny

Answer 3

If you ask me it's not the "age gap thing". But the fact that you can't tell you parents because I take it they would disapprove means that you are scared of telling them. But the fact that your boyfriend has gone to spend the new year with his family after you being together practically a year and a half means, well what it means is either he has very little respect for you and the relationship, I don't know allot but what I do know is you sound like a nice person and yes I could tell you that you could do better I could say get rid of that loser. But the fact is you have been together this long show that you care for him. I honestly think that you should tell your parents and start the year with a clean slate and as for you boyfriend i think he should address his family. after all I could why didn't you go with him why didn't he stay! I think you both have to be honest with one another and I hope thing work out. phone your boyfriend now and tell him you love him if you haven't already and tell you parents!.
Have a happy new year.

Answer 4

no offence girl, but i think u answer your own question!, i mean all those faults and taught that are running through your mind might actually need sorted out either by sitting and having a deep conversation to ur bf about ur relationship and basically if both of u want the same thing. and bear this in mind, if he made you fell this way is probably ain't worth it so don't settle for less as there are plenty of guy out there that will treat your u like princess, which u deserve. I've actually posted a similar questions about the age gap issue, a couple of months back so ur welcome to browse through it if u want. anyways hope this helps and good luck in sorting this out as it is not fair on u not man should have the right to let a woman feel like this.

Answer 5

It doesnt really matter what anyone else thinks of the age difference that you have between you..its what the two of you think of it that counts! I personally dont see it as a huge gap or as a problem, i know a guy who was 40 when he married his 17 year old girlfriend, despite the hassle he got and the backstabbing from both families and so called mates they are still happily married with two great kids 10 years down the road!
So dont worry about anyone else and their opinions-as long as your happy with it!

Answer 6

you know what this is FATE that i get to answer a question like this...tell you why i am 23 and have a son with a 27yr old man who left me for a young 18yr old girl as all she seems think is a relastionship is GREAT sex and that age gap a man dont have do muc for the girl to think he love them as a 18yr old dont expect much dont take offence just listen as i have been there. The older man see's it as a easy girl to have GREAT sex with and not have to live up to the expectation of growing up the fact you been together a year and whatever and he has not met your family is proof there alone what he really think and feel....i bet the sex is great and you get all those butterfly feelings and then he goes home and visa versa.....I am not slating you its just my partner baby father a BIG FOOL either way you want put it... keeps coming back to me and saying SORRY she is nothing just a silly little girl...not that i believe him as he FULL of crap..........

but honey men like that who pry on girls from the age of 15-at least 19 i think are sick perverted weak men as they either cant live life to the standards of a mature adult. or they get a kick out of having sex and hurting young girls and ladies we have all been hurt from these sort of men once at least.

so my advise hun which i must be honest you wont take as none of us every do when given it but when you do leave him or he leaves you make sure you learn from your mistakes and have respect for yourself and your family as for what ever reason you think your family will disaprove is the same reason in the back of your own head.....

leave him date men in your age or not so far down line its true what someone say here age is a number yes but wisdom and maturity is not....... its different if you like 30 and then met a man at 39 as you will both know what you want in life. but you are still expericencing and learning about yourself....and in 3yrs time you will feel and think different and again at 25 he is at a prime of maturity in life...so dont let him hold you back and the longer you hide this from you family the more you causing yourself problems in the long run..............
and no just cause he spend new year with his family doesnt mean he dont love you but only you know if he really love you and you to him

Answer 7

If your having these feelings you need to get out now.I'm 39 my husband is 50 so age really doesn't matter after your of legal age.I probably would love anyone I've spent 15months with .Maybe you are confusing love for just deeply caring.The old saying goes whatever your doing on new years eve is what you'll be doing the rest of the year, so I guess you'll be without him.Good Luck Happy New Year.

Answer 8

i live in a house share thing with a couple with a slightly bigger age gap only they live together they don't get along either the girlfriend who talks to me alot said her boyfriend doesn't treat how she wants him to treat her every time he is home his main thing he does is use his pc most the for the internet ok i myself use it but never than i need to but if was excess time on a pc it would be playing a game anyway i reckon he is using you if gona split from it might be an idea to have some support from a friend or 2 because he also threatened her to take him when she tried to split from him and she was on her own at the time

Answer 9

I would say you are nothing more than a booty call. The age difference is way to much, I only say that because you are only 18 and you have a full life a head of you. Kick him to the curb for 2007 and start out fresh with a new guy ! Closer to your age. Even 22-23 is ok.
Skip the drama and move on. You deserve to be treated better than that. If your not good enough to take home to the family. THEN YOU ARE TOO DAMN GOOD TO TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF.................................

Answer 10

Im 44, Ive done the same too, well in the past.
when I was 40. babes, if its fun then do what you want, but dont let go of your plans and future ideas. your life is just beginning, and all your dreams are for you, not for him.
Had he been one of those rare, special older men, who take care of you and makes you feel LOVED, then my reply would have been different. Try taking him to a disco with people of your own age! he'll soon piss off on his own.