I have 4 beautiful children and I really want to move on he has caused me to stop living and feeling good about myself .I'm only 36 and want a chance to really be happy for my kids and me.Will anyone really accept me with 4 kids.I'm going back to school for a degree and I'm really working on me first but 4 kids is alot.
2006-12-31 12:38:02 · 15 answers · asked by pookie 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The way it works is, you jump ship because your present ship is unlivable. Are you better off alone than with him?
2006-12-31 12:41:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Of course.. Same as there are alot of guys who would dump a girl for not wanting kids at all. But honestly.. dont worry about all that. Like you said now is your me time. When its the right time and the guy is right you'll know it. Your husband is not the only man who's ever gonna love you and your wonderful kids. But make sure your upfront about the fact that you have 4 kids, if a guy doesn't like it then Hes not for you.. they are a part of you and your life!Trust me there are men out there who would love to have a big family and dont care that the kids arent biological his. But get everything settled between you and the ex hubby before introducing any new men to the kids. And dont be afraid to do a background check on any new guy who may meet your kids.
2006-12-31 12:48:11 · answer #2 · answered by ChrissyLicious 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am not a professional Marriage counselor. But ill say is that, if youve tried all your best to maintain the marriage but ll he does is to bring you down, then mayb eits time to take a break for your self- for the sake of the kids.
Iam happy you are working to improve your self. Take pride in your new pursuits and kids. Feel happy and blessed for them. If your hubby never comes back to apoligise, move on. There are other men whose wives had dumped them and are with kids. They ar also looking for someone like you who has learnt to move on and to have a possitive mind as you to pair with.
You are even blessed with kids, which means you are a real womn with potential(not baren, able to enjoy sex, is a mother, matured in life...) what more? Never allow him to blame you for being the reason why he cant appreciate what God has given him and to be a fully responsible man. You are brave and I am proud of you. Happy new year 2007. Peace.
2006-12-31 12:47:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You sound like someone who has self-respect for yourself and who isn't willing to put with a non-committal man any longer, and it looks like you are hanging on to your dignity! I think by separating yourself from your husband and wanting to be happy, you would be setting a good example for your children (and not vice versa like someone people would believe), you are still relatively young at 36 and it is pretty positive and very progessive that you are seeking a degree at school. I think, with the many opportunities out there that would be there for you, even with four children, there will be another great man out there and if he doesn't accept you or your children for who all of you are then he is worth it, good luck and hope things work out for you even though they will take time.
2006-12-31 12:43:19 · answer #4 · answered by purringout 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Get your ducks in a row--get your education do the best for the kids--let the looser go and let life unfold the way it will --Its going to be better even if its you and the kids--and yes IF your children are well behaved and respectful you absolutely will find Mr. Right--Just dont let another man into your life if there are conflicts with the children that will make for a unhappy ending--
2006-12-31 12:46:44 · answer #5 · answered by skizzle-d-wizzle 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Unfourtunatly, there are many people just like you out there, woman and men; the one thing you should be concerned with is your kids. How will this affect them if did leave? Or if you didn't? What will they take with them in the future and how will they preceive you and their father; keep in mind, they may respect you more if you leave than if you stay. Also give you hubby a chance to redeem him self, by seeking professional help; this may spark something that was lost long ago.
One last thing to bear in mind is that it's hard to fall in love
2006-12-31 13:29:15 · answer #6 · answered by Manny Fresh 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
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2006-12-31 13:27:19 · answer #7 · answered by peanut 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get into counciling, immeditately. For one thing, even if you decide the marriage is not worth salvaging, you will get a good idea of what you will be facing by leaving. IF you loved him once, maybe you can rediscover the reason. If you are unhappy it is up to you to work on your own happiness. A divorce sure isn't going to change you or really MAKE you happy.
2006-12-31 12:50:37 · answer #8 · answered by PartyTime 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm right there with someone else's response above. Your taking a big step with four children. Is your current living situation bad enough for you to step into living alone? Even if you don't find someone else? It's a risk, but you need to do what is going to be best for you, to live for yourself.
2006-12-31 12:45:22 · answer #9 · answered by jimstock60 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does he agree that he has stopped you from living and feeling good about yourself?
Why would he want to do this? Has he stopped living and feeling good about himself also?
Marriage Counseling is the best unless you have some serious financial backup.
Divorces often cause both parties to be worse off than they were.
2006-12-31 12:55:24 · answer #10 · answered by needliberty 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
can you afford to live on your own with 4 kids...i left my husband with 2 kids and its really hard...i say use him for his money, a babysitting and stay married but do your own thing get a job and be on the look out for a new man...hard to come by when you have 4 kids all under 13??? that a tough one...good luck its really hard on the kids ..
2006-12-31 12:44:38 · answer #11 · answered by soda7020 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋