I have a step mother and she hates me and I didn't do anything to her?What should I do?

Question

every time I go to my dads she goes''Y R U HERE'' its like she does not what me to see my dad and I love my dad the only time I go there is when It is my brother B-Days and I am 12 . and I don't like her she is a witch she hates my dads parents because she does not by for her kids when they barley no them. and I am half asian from my dads side and they don't speak well english.SO SOMEONE HELP ME AND I DON'T WANT TO TELL HIM AND SORRY ON MY SPELLING I SPELL BAD.

Answer 1

Talk to your father, let him know that you want to have a harmonious time when you are with him, but you are getting the feeling that she does not like you.

Ask him to talk with her and find out what her grief is, so it can be sorted out.

That way, it looks like you are the one who is trying to be a good son. If she doesn't cooperate, then it looks bad on her.

The elders in my husbands family do not speak English as a first language.

If it helps you to understand why she may not want to go over there.....

I sit there while everyone is talking. No one talks to me. I am not included on anything, because I have no idea what is going on. There is nothing for me to do.

When you are placed in a strange house where you feel like an outsider, you will automatically not feel welcomed. You are always uncomfortable and are instantly bored.

If there is no one to cling to the entire time you are there (who will communicate with you), you feel as if you are swimming alone in the sea with no land in sight.

Next time she is in that situation, offer to translate for her, spend some time with her. She WILL appreciate it, and may even start to warm up.

Answer 2

Little one I'll tell you about my experience with my step-Mother.She came into my life after my Mother died,She never signed on for the hell I put her trough.I was only 5 years old then and we had some fights that were real bad.It upset my Father a lot.Today She and I have both growen a lot.WE love and respect each other very much.This all happened after my Father died.I wish he could be here to see how we get along now.I know that she was only 5% blame on our terrible times.My step-Mother is a very sweet loving person and I think it is a shame that all step-Children don't have one just like mine.The two of you will grow to find the same love and respect that we have.Best of luck to you and her.

Answer 3

You might want to try and talk to your dad about the way she treats you. Look, It sounds like their relationship is about to go due south anyway. Just bide your time, If this woman can't stand you or your dad's parents, chances are she doesn't like anyone else either. she has some serious issues and it's all going to blow up in her face eventually. So be patient, and don't worry about her so much. But please do talk to your Mother and your Father about the way she is treating you, because it isn't right. Good luck.

Answer 4

this is really had for you because if you talk to your dad and he says something to her, she will think you are trying to come between them and treat you even worse, and since you are only 12 it would be hard for you to ask her to discuss it because chances are she will be obnoxious to you. if i were you i think i would ask your dad and her to sit down together and then approach the subject, just say i feel like you don't like me, is there any reason? for instance---- , then go on to tell how she has treated you, that way it will be out in the open and she can't try to manipulate your father into being against you. and hopefully she will have an explanation.

Answer 5

Try to get along with her for your Dad's sake,If that doesn't work then talk to your Dad about it and see what can be done between the three of you. It is hard when marriages fail the kids are the ones to suffer. It doesn't have to be that way.

Answer 6

Don't go over there anymore and when your Dad ask tell him.And if he doesn't like it or won't do anything about stick to your guns.Eventually he will see her for who she is.You need to take care of you first and if that means cutting all ties then so be it.Talk to your Mother though and let her know how low your self esteem is.This is not a good environment for you to be around good luck

Answer 7

Kill her with kindness... be kind to her even if you don't want to be, she will feel like a bat when you do. And unfortunately i'm in the same situation so I know how to handle it. Talk to your dad, write him a note, call him just tell him how you feel. Explain to him the situation you are in, even though it is very hard to talk to him when you feel as if you will hurt him if you tell him. I know.... I used to have an abusive relationship w/ my father and was terrified to tell him what I thought... just tell him and get it off you chest. And remember kill her w/ kindness.

Answer 8

Sit her and your dad down and talk about it, she wont say anything rude in front of your dad and your dad will try and help the both of you. If she then brakes her promiss and does something she said she wouldn't then comfront your dad, by telling him exactly what happened.

Answer 9

If you don't feel comfortable talking to your dad, then talk to your grandparents. I'm sure they wouldn't like the way she is treating you. Tell SOMEONE! Don't let her disrespect you anymore. You have every right to go see your dad.

Answer 10

I know you don't want to tell your father, but he is the only person that will be able to set her straight. If you mother and father have a decent relationship, you can try discussing with her. Ultimately, your father is the only one that can tell his wife that she has to treat you better. Children come first, that's the bottom line.

Signed mother of three, step-mother to one.