I have a step-son that is 9 and out of control. How do I locate a boot camp or a type of behavior modification

Question

He is ADHD and has had a fair share of tramatic experences to deal with. He has been spoiled and spoon fed by his dad and his mom allowed him to run amuck. He knows no boundries and lacks respect for anybody or anything. He is a brillent child and has much potential to make something of his life... but only if we get him under control NOW. Where would I find a listing of boot camps or an instatution of some sort for childen out of control?

Answer 1

As a parent YOU need to take control and get advice on managing his behaviour. Sending an already traumatised child to boot camp seems hard on the child. If he is diagnosed as being ADHD he surely has a Physician you could ask for help. Respect is taught as well as earned. All the adults in his life need to get together and set consistent boundaries.

Answer 2

Have you ever had to train a dog? The training goes best with positive reinforcement(food snacks) over negative(beating, trying to invoke fear) Because he is not your own.
How many kids were there that had ADHD while you were a kid? None, right? That is what that behind and hickorey stick was for. Kept you on the straight and narrow. FUNNY, eh?
So seeing that you can't whip em, you got to deprive them and offer to them as a treat things they like IF they do what you tell them first. Like they will get to watch TV for 1/2 if they clean up their room or they get a sweet if they do. If they are just dropped on your doorstep and run in your house breaking stuff right off that is because YOU haven't set some rules. Start by having nothing there for them to break (yes that means that you will be depriving yourself for a time but it has to start somewhere.) The parents(one of which you raised) are not doing this. It was too much work.
"Spare the rod and you spare the child" motto does not work.
The prisons are fuller than they ever have been.
There is no training in boot camp. He will just get beaten on legally and have more resentment when he gets out (and he will know how to use a gun)
Going back to the dog, if you let it run amuk, it goes wild and you shoot it. Nuff said.

Answer 3

do not add more drama to his life by sending him to boot camp...As a mother of 4 it makes me sick to think you would even consider such a thing especially when you yourself said he has had plenty of trauma in his life. What he needs is love and someone who will help him through this...You need to deal with it. If you dont liek it you need to get out of that marriage. It is not right. i am not sayign this to be rude I am just telling it like it is. boot camp is going to solve nothing, what needs to happen is his parents need to straighten up and become better parents so, you need to be asking where the nearest parenting classes are for them...It is not the childs fault that his parents are "spoon feeding" him and "running him amuck"..

Answer 4

Ok as a sister of a kid like this, I know what you are going through. I am also a victim child of divorce so I know what he's going through. He just wants his parents to get together again. I am the older step sister and do the same thing to my step father. I want my parents to get together again and my lil bro wants his together again. So be patient and calm in these situations. Show him that you aren't so bad. Take him and only him out to ice cream or maybe teach him to do something that he will like... he will warm up th you. If there are any other kids in the house, make sure you pay good attention to all of them and the same amount of attention to them so they don't feel as if you are playing favorites toward the others.

Answer 5

i know what i have add and slight adhd you probably dont want advice from a 12 year old but ur gunna get it anyway, there are alot of pills to control ADHD see i used to take them then i stopped and then started then stopped ask a physisian about it becaused its the only thing that keeps my brother under control alot of us are adopted and alot of us came with learning disabiblities but your step son just wants some attention he will grow out of this its just a phase do u really think that your step son will be running around in the hall ways at age 15. But one time my brother was so out of control my mother really couldent take it so she took him to the sike ward and they kept him there for about 2 weeks. When he came back he was so nice to meand every body around him he is convinced hes "gangster" but when he came back he was really nice to everybody. So whereever you live if the pills dont work contact a local sike ward and your son will come back with improvements.

Answer 6

I know a kid who at 14 was sent to bootcamp in the desert for problems w/new stepdad & running away because of it. He came back & did well for a while, then the fights w/mom & stepdad started up again. So they sent him back. After returning this time he joined JRROTC & seemed ok. Days later he was kicked out of school & arrested for posession of pot. He's on probation now & has to stay w/mom. Basically all he learned at bootcamp was how to be more like the worst kids there.
Try counseling for him, family therapy for all and join a support group for parents like you. Please use the bootcamp as a last resource. He may come back worse than when he left.

Answer 7

Try to find a martial arts prgram for him that follows the guidelines of atrium society. There was a study done that showed that martial arts teaching the spiritual qualities as well as the moves themselves made good students our of delinquints.
I don''t have the url at the moment but if you do a search for atrium society you will find some help on this including, if I recall a way to find schools in your area.

Answer 8

Instead of trying to get rid of him, try looking close to home for a counselor or therapist, and get the kid some help. Being shipped off does not sound very caring on your part, and that might be part of the problem. If he feels unwanted, it will make it worse.

Answer 9

Before you take any action clear it with his parents. He is not your child, you MUST remember this. Try psychiatry and medications to help with the ADHD. Look up ADHD on NIMH Home Page. (National Institutes of Mental Health).

Answer 10

ok dude seriously mabey try calming him down oh and did u ever think of trying medicine? and just because a kid is adhd doesnt mean u should ship him off to boot camp imagine the damage he would do there u could play it safe and keep him home or u can just look at yahoo yellow pages and look em up there.