My boyfriend to be told me has slept with about 3:4 girls at first when I asked him he said "Hold on I cant remember"
I mean hello...
Anyways being the jealous person that I am I dont wanna date him anymore..Is this stupid of me???
I mean guys think about it y'all wouldnt like it if a girl has slept with 3/4 guys so I dont see why a girl would accept it right why should I??
Is this stupid or am i being reasonable? thanks very much!!!
2006-12-31 05:15:53 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You're being soooo reasonable! Step on him like a doormat and keep in down there...it's new years eve and you should feel proud! Whether you're single...or with freak...or whatever! But why would you give yourself away to him if it isn't special for him and how could you if you know that? You've got to see the facts, they're right there. They're on the tip of your nose, hun! Ask yourself if you find yourself considering to dump him...how long has he really held a relationship? Or was it the girl that held that time of there relationship together?
But you have to ask him if he was joking. Guys have a way about joking around and still looking serious. Maybe he was just nervous.
You have to figure it out on your own. He's a guy, you know how they can be, right?
Hope you chose me for best answer...
2006-12-31 05:22:37 · answer #1 · answered by Sample ID 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I think the fact that you're considering forgetting the relationship over his past is unreasonable. Why would you even ask a person that question? Especially since you're not in a relationship. In his mind he probably is feeling as if it's really none of your damn business (and that's why he lied). More important facts and concerns when considering starting a relationship would be if he's had unprotected sex in the past, how he feels about you, and if he's even into having a long-term relationship. The number of people a person has been with does not justify the loyalty or character of that person. He must have had qualities that interested you before the questioning so focus on those things that attracted you to him and not his past. Be easy baby girl and stop being so jealous (not gonna help in any future relationship).
Oh... and for future knowledge... don't ask questions that you don't want the answer to.
2006-12-31 14:01:39 · answer #2 · answered by Y.a.S.L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want someone without a past, you'll have to become a cradle snatcher... and even then....
Seriously, what does what he did before you have anything to do with you now???? I feel sorry for you... you're actually jealous of time he spent with someone before you.... That is no longer a part of his life. That's just plain... pitiful!
The problem isn't how many people he slept with. The problem is you're jealous... which means you just lack confidence in yourself... very much so if you're jealous of his past. I mean, it's not like he's sleeping with those 3 or 4 girls right now while you're dating him.
Oh... and supposing he really didn't remember if he'd slept with 3... or 4.... or 5.... because those girls didn't mean anything to him but getting his rocks off...? It doesn't mean he couldn't remember because there were like 10, or 15 or 300!
I don't think you're being stupid... nor do I think you're being reasonable. I just think you're suffering from low self-esteem... and lack of confidence in yourself. And to me, that makes me feel sorry for you. Now if you'd said he's sleeping with 3 or 4 girls WHILE he's with you, that would be another story. Either way, I sure hope you protect yourself.... how many guys have you slept with???
2006-12-31 13:30:02 · answer #3 · answered by The ReDesign Diva 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to do what you believe is the best for yourself. However the number of girls he has "slept with" should make no difference to you now.
Jealousy is ones lack of self approval and self confidence, it has nothing to do with the other person. There used to be a very good site on the net concerning jealousy, it is gone now. I did copy and save it so if you would like a copy of how to get over your jealousy then please email me and I will send you the file.
To me, the more people one "sleeps with" the more experience one has. My total stands at 50 and I hope to add more. But then my wife and I are swingers so that is the reason for the higher numbers too.
In the end you have to decide what you personally desire to do and live with. I say however don't worry about the past only your future. If you want the information I spoke of please email me.
2006-12-31 13:27:20 · answer #4 · answered by pinelake302 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sexual intercourse is different for a girl than a guy, because it is a more intimate act physically. She has a guy inside of her and if a condom isn't used, then he leaves a part of him behind in her. The same isn't true for the guy, not remotely. Anyone who says that sex is the same for the girl and the guy simply isn't considering this. And on some level, every guy knows that it's more of an intimate act for the girl, so naturally they find it more upsetting.
Him saying that he couldn't remember at first could have just been his way of stalling for time in order to think of how best to approach your question. You said you're the jealous type and he's certain to know this, so wanted to find a tactful way to tell you so as not to upset you more than necessary, while still being truthful.
BTW in case you missed it, then yes, I think you are being unreasonable, because you are.
2006-12-31 13:23:22 · answer #5 · answered by marklemoore 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is no stupid question. I think if you are going to date/be with someone, it is something that you have the right to know. There is a BIG differance between 1 and 100. And IF you do ever sleep with him you are sleeping with everyone he has slept with. I think that it is important that someone knows how many and WHO they are, what if you catch something, since ya know the more people you have been with the more chances you could catch something. I think it is great that you have high stadards for yourself. Good for you!
2006-12-31 15:00:19 · answer #6 · answered by MICHELLE M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is dumb not to date someone because of how many people they've slept with, if you really care about him you would look past that. But then again-how old is he? If he's not but like 13 to 16 and has already slept with 3 to 4 girls-no you don't need to be with him thats just to young to be messin around.
2006-12-31 13:18:32 · answer #7 · answered by ♥Jada Alyce♥ 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i am a guy so hopefully this will help, i think it depends on how old a person is. (that's the reasonable way i have always decided) When i was young i felt the same as you i wouldn't date a girl who had been with a lot of people, but as i got older and the girls got older i had to be more flexible. I suppose if this guy is a little older than you, you might consider that. But no i don't necessarily think you're being unreasonable.
2006-12-31 13:24:16 · answer #8 · answered by Eddie N 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Actually this is a valid question. It is an unfair double standard. It is OK for guys to sleep with every woman that say yes but you would be labeled a tramp if you did the same.
Now they don't stop and think? They have to sleep with someone. They aren't sleeping with each other? At least most aren't.
If it bothers you that much I'd find someone else. And it is best not to ask about past relationships men and women.
2006-12-31 13:22:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Being stupid. How many people someone has slept with is no ones business. I never ask how many people someone has slept with and if people ask me, I tell them to grow up. It doesn't matter. Do you also ask how many people he has kissed, how many oranges he has eaten in his lifetime, and how many pairs of skechers he has owned?
The better question to ask someone is "have you always been safe and protected yourself in the past?" Because that's the only part that's your business.
2006-12-31 13:18:51 · answer #10 · answered by C_girl98 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋