My boyfriend has feelings for his ex. Yet, he took me in when I became unemployed. He has been taking care of me by putting a roof over my head and food on the table. He has been patient and supportive about the job situation.
There are times I think that he really cares about me, but then I know a part of him wants to work things out with his ex. There are days I want to leave, but haven't found the courage. And money is a problem. I can't just leave without having money to pay my bills.
So, am I using him or his he using me...or are we using each other?
2006-12-31 03:47:34 · 17 answers · asked by torn 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
NO, I don't think you're using each other at all! You have a bond there, I can tell.
It's a tough situation when there are feelings involved with someone else! I've said it before and I can say it again, I think you need to find a simple job and get your self-conf. up and your self-esteem up as well before you do anything else! If you want to WIN your BF, just start looking for a job, build your inner strength! I had to do this, myself and it's the only way to start fresh!
Your BF will respect you more, also when he sees you being STRONG, because when you get in charge of yourself, there's nothing like it, GIRL! I KNOW!
I had to start from "Scratch" 2 years ago and I'm a different person now than I was 2 years ago, and all it took was getting a job I LIKED, and that's number 1------ get a job you know you would like! fill out applications and that alone will start building your confidence, and I mean it! Nothing will stop you once you get an interview or 2! By then you will be prepared to work and you will get hired! HONEST!
You will be ok! If your BF loves you, he'll be EVEN more supportive about your job situation!
start looking at the ads. make it fun!
If you can restart your life from the bottom and work upwards, your life can change drastically, for the better!
now, get going, and God Bless!
2006-12-31 04:07:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long have you been there? I would make a harder effort to find me a job to move out and be self supportive. I know in this day and age that is not so easy, but there is also state help for you to get on your feet again.
After you do this then if he cares for you he will come to you and you will have your answer.
You will feel better about yourself if you accomplish something than continue this present living arrangement. Good Luck
2006-12-31 03:57:22 · answer #2 · answered by Gypsygrl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first beggers cant be chosers so get a job even if you think its beneath you because at this point it isnt. Dont take advantage of his generosity. Second dont be used either but right now it seems you are using him more. Does he know you would leave but dont have the money?
2006-12-31 03:59:29 · answer #3 · answered by troys_wifey2003 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gee... I guess it would be too hard to actually sit down together and TALK about it...
It sounds like you are both using each other. He is using you as 'the rebound' and you are using him as a crutch during your difficult time.
Seriously though... have a sit down a talk about it. Both of you have issues and they will quickly come to the surface if you can communicate to each other. Good luck!
2006-12-31 03:57:11 · answer #4 · answered by perthboy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you guys are using each other. I am not sure about him cause there isn't a lot of detail about him and his ex. Does he tell you he misses her? Does he tell you he loves you? Were you tow together before your situation happened financially?
2006-12-31 03:54:56 · answer #5 · answered by Lovely Lady 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you're using each other, bc if he has feelings for his ex, your in a way helping him slowly get over those feelings, or making him relize he needs her. youre using him bc u need shelter and food, but once you can stand up on your own two feet, its time to leave.
2006-12-31 03:55:49 · answer #6 · answered by i_<3_Jonas bois 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think u r using him not he becouse when someone is lonely he / she need someone so as he can if u give him love he will love u more than u.
stop using him unless one day happen that someone use u . leave him if u don't care about him
2006-12-31 03:57:56 · answer #7 · answered by simple girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are both getting benefits out of this, so are using each other.
2006-12-31 03:55:01 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think your using him. I think you're letting a friend help you out. It's ok to take a handout when you really need one. I don't know how he would be using you. I think you're aren't using each other.
2006-12-31 03:52:12 · answer #9 · answered by Michelle M 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are both using each other.
2006-12-31 03:51:52 · answer #10 · answered by lara 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋