I am 19 years old. My five year old brother is a monster!! I also have a 6 year old sister and a 7 year old brother. Neither of the other children are like the 5 year old. His name is Robert.
His father is really a bad influence. He is verbally abusive towards my mother and everybody else around him. Though I have taught the other two children to not behave like their father, Robert is just not learning.
Out side, if our sister is on his bike, he'll pick a rock up and throw it at her. Inside, he'll pick up pencils and threaten to stab who ever is bothering him.
I know that it IS possible to teach him differently than what he sees his father doing, as i have done it already with my two other siblings.
I feel that letting this problem go will only cause it to become worse. Over the years my brother has become more and more violent. My mother has no Idea to handle the kids, ever, so it is USUALLY up to me.... help?
2006-12-31 01:20:21 · 9 answers · asked by ? 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
My mother and I were thinking about bringing him to some kind of a professional therapist or something to see whats going on. As I said, he acts like his father quite often...the only difference is his father is only verbally abusive and my brother is becoming physically abusive. He even hurts our cats. I have been working at a daycare for almost 3 years now and I have never seen anything like this.
My mother will be talking to his school teacher on Tuesday, I'm just looking for suggestions from others. .....
2006-12-31 01:23:24 · update #1
It's hard being the eldest right? Me too, but you seem to have tougher problems. I don't quite know how to deal with him properly, but i can suggest ways to make him feel more relax and not so violent.
1) Put some lavender scent in the house. The scent of lavender soothes the nerves and make a person feel more relax. Maybe this will make him not so violent.
2) Play soft baroque music in his room when he sleeps.
Hope these will be helpful. Good luck.
2006-12-31 01:41:47 · answer #1 · answered by Daffodil 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Did you know a common thread among serial killers is that as a child they would hurt and kill their pets?
Mom, Dad, and the kid need to go see a therapist. Mom is in destructive relationships which she may think she can handle but its destroying her kids.
Robert is not stupid. He sees what gains his father makes by being abusive, and since he does not have the language skills nor the physique to back it up.... he reverts to the thing that he does know how to do....
So the relationship between Mom and Dad is what Robert is trying to emulate. As long as Dad is allowed to hold a dominant position in the family, Robert will not be convinced that Dad's methods are not best.
So a therapist will help Mom and Dad learn to live either with each other or away from each other. A therapist will also help Robert find better ways to gain attention.
2006-12-31 01:47:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
A therapist would be a good idea for him. It sounds to me like he is a> trying to be like his father, but lacking the verbal experience is doing so in a physical way and b> is angry about the situation in general (wanting to be like someone his family -- and possibly himself-- disapprove of, of being treated the way he is by his father) and expresses this anger in a physically disruptive manner.
Try talking to him at the time of the incident (immediately when you see him throw rocks or pencils, etc) and ask him why he's doing it. Be sure to assure him he will not get in any trouble or get any slack for telling you why (and be sure you follow through, even if you don't like what he says!) You'll be more apt to get a straight, honest answer if he feels he can trust you without being judged. (Telling him he shouldn't be that way, or that way is bad way,etc is judging and he won't be straight with you) If you can get to the root of things, you can tell him that you would prefer him not to be that way, that it is better to be another way, etc but don't make him feel bad for the way he is.
He probably has a lot of deal with internally already without feeling put down by his big sis
2006-12-31 02:11:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is there any way you can prevent him from seeing his father? If there is try that. Also take him to a therapist or counseler though I don't think they'll be able to do much with a 5 year old. Maybe he feels he isn't getting enough attention from your mom and that is why he's acting out.
2006-12-31 08:54:09 · answer #4 · answered by robedzombiesoul 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs a healthy way to express his own anger and emotions. I would work on ways that he can express being angry and hurt. It is also not fair to expect him to behave any differently when he has such a strong role model everyday.
Here are some ways that he can be angry:
- Punch a pillow
- Rip up newspapers
- Draw angry drawings
- Make playdough objects and throw them.
- Have him run, or stamp his feet outside on the grass.
- Teach him he can scream into a pillow at the top of his lungs.
- Empower him to talk about his feelings with people that will respond appropriately to his anger, acknowledge it.
- Talk to him about the consequences of hurting others.
- Love him. And show him that behaving appropriately will result in rewards.
There is a great book to read to him as well called When I Feel Angry...
http://www.amazon.com/When-Feel-Angry-Way/dp/0807588881/sr=8-1/qid=1167598893/ref=pd_bbs_1/104-9324153-1209522?ie=UTF8&s=books
2006-12-31 08:03:10 · answer #5 · answered by Just2BMe 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-01 08:58:41 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Punish Him When He Does Something Bad.......or maybe ask you father to cool off.......but personally if I had a job and I was 19 I would rent an apartament and move out....
2006-12-31 08:39:15 · answer #7 · answered by Chris 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
its probably he sees power rangers and war shows and he probably get over it its just a stage
2006-12-31 01:41:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
he is a brat?
2006-12-31 10:11:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋