2006-12-30 19:49:25 · 16 answers · asked by brabus600 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
i don't wanna do him. I just wanna be close and have a friend i can trust but guys seem to think that because ur gay u just wanna have sex with them. Why? i love my friends seeing as my how my family has failed me and look to friends for support. everyone i know is trsaight and there is only 1 guy i like, i respect him and keep my distance but it kills me when i think of him. please i need advice, email me if you mean good only!!!!!!!!silver_seraph99@yahoo.com.
2006-12-30 20:16:50 · update #1
You can't "get" someone to like you.He either will like you or he won't.If you have to be anything other then yourself you won't really be gaining any true friendship because in order for someone to like you they have to like you as you are.As far as taking it any further then friendship, if he is straight respect that and don't force yourself on him.If we expect the respect of the heterosexual community we must respect them as well.
2006-12-30 20:01:53 · answer #1 · answered by BuckFush 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Are you currently friends with this guy or is he just an acquaintance? If he's just an acquaintance, look at similar interests if you wanna be his friend.
On the other hand, it really sounds like you have a crush though. If you keep your distance, you'll protecting yourself emotionally and conveying respect to him, so it probably is best to stay distant if your feelings run deeper than friendship. A person's sexuality can't be changed. If the guy's a friend and you try anything that shows you want to be more than friends, you could lose an awesome friend. I have three straight guy friends that fit what you mean as far as being a good source of support. To me these men are like brothers. You'll find guys like that naturally. You can't force a friendship that isn't there and if you pursue a straight male friend, you'll most likely lose the friend.
2006-12-30 21:06:38 · answer #2 · answered by Paul 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, if you want to assure a lasting friendship this person needs to know that you are gay. If that's a problem, either to you or him, I think the friendship is likely doomed from the start.
That said, here is my advice. Pay close attention to what he is interested in. Show real interest in the same yourself. If it involves something you don't know much about spend some time learning about it. Maybe even ask your friend to teach you more about the subject/activity. Learn to be a really good listener. Be responsive. Don't just be wanting to express your own feelings and needs but respond to his as well. Learn to give sympathetic responses and be a good sounding board. Basically, try to resonate with him and get on the same frequency. Say he likes jazz and you prefer rock music. Stretch your horizons and try to meet him where HIS taste in music lies. Be generous with your expressions of approval and appreciation. Learn how to be a mirror for him at appropriate times, that is to say an instrument that faithfully reflects who he is. Give him frequent affirmative, positive optimistic feedback. Be accepting of his faults as well as his virtues while encouraging him to be the best and all he can be. Don't be critical, demanding or cloying. Don't be jealous or envious of him. Appreciate him fully and SHOW your appreciation of his friendship. Do all this and trust me you will be irresistible as a friend.
2006-12-31 03:47:15 · answer #3 · answered by Seeker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why is it so important to have a straight friend
What are in your mind the benefits?
Most of my friends are straight BTW.
Met them at birthday parties ,social events,art openings,a course of Turkish I took etc.
I am always friendly and open to people in general
And it is easy ,if you share for instance a hobby.
Try to be yourself.
And not overly friendly:it can be misinterpreted.
U may use my messenger:please not for rubbish.
I see enough of that here already.
Greetings:Rob.
A Happy New Year.
But first have to do some shopping.
2006-12-31 00:48:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say that long term you need to start looking for other gay men. You will not get the intimacy you crave from a straight bloke.
He could be a really good friend, but that's it - and you want more.
It really isn't that difficult to meet nice men. Try online dating.
2006-12-30 23:35:46 · answer #5 · answered by psychedelic_fighter 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey i can't help u though cuz exactly the same problem is mine,just the difference is that im a lesb n ur a gay,,,,i can simply wish u get ur love,n will pray for u ....please tell me when u really get him.i'll be happy.
i've put in all kinds of trials with her to seduce her towards me or make her love me or get attracted towards me.....but what i actually did is,i've lost my friend even in the attempt.though we r still best friends but u knw nowadays she has lottttttttttttttta attitude....which i hate but i love her...i also don't really care whether i get her physically or not,but want soembody to suport me each time,to love me to care about me,to be my streangth....but i can't even force her cuz idont like when hurt her n irritate her for things which she doesn't like...cuz i knw this way im simply goin got lose her....i know shes not so devoted towards me but for me this is only enough that she smiles at me or talk to me or i can feel her presence n be called as ehr best friend....though in reality we don't have anything as realtion of real friends even
2006-12-30 22:20:39 · answer #6 · answered by kawal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well for starters - you can not "get" someone to like you. You can however make it easier for someone to like you.
To this end - be yourself. Continue to do what it is a friend does.
If you want to have a friend (gay, straight, whatever) you must first BE a friend. It is amazing how well people respond to a person who is sincerely trying to be their friend.
Good luck
2006-12-31 05:52:09 · answer #7 · answered by Christian P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most men are afraid of their sexuality and would feel they
might be attracted to anyone who might be sweet to them.
Men also are afraid someone will think they are gay.
Approach his ego.
If you ask a guy if he is man enough to be your friend without any
sex or ask him if he will be your protector he will look at you
differently. Maybe even become proud to be your friend and
bodyguard.
2006-12-30 20:48:07 · answer #8 · answered by Dutch V 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only as a friend. Trying to seduce him could only ruin an already fine friendship.
2006-12-30 20:02:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he is straight thn u have a very low chance of turnin him to like u in the way u like im. just stay friends wive him
2006-12-30 23:08:07 · answer #10 · answered by dudett 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋