he is getting remairred in a couple years and said that she is the love of his life. I dont want him but why do i feel bad?
2006-12-30 16:37:05 · 25 answers · asked by vicki V 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Men are fickle...don't believe anything they say.
2006-12-30 16:39:24 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He told you something VERY IMPORTANT, which you believed, and now it is not true. No one likes being lied to...and the thing is, he wasn't lying at the time. I'm sure he had every intention at that time of staying together forever and being the love of YOUR life. However, when a man says something like this to you, it gives you power....it makes you feel special. Then, even when things are over, you may not want him, but it may be hard to deal with the fact that all the things that were so special to you are now being said to someone else. It would bother me, too. But if it makes you feel any better, you can do the same thing. not necessarily get remarried, but all the things you said to him that you sincerely meant...you can mean them to someone else!
2006-12-30 21:39:10 · answer #2 · answered by grayhare 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cause it is an ending to a certain type of relationship, and that is always sad. The fact that you feel sad probably means that on some level you never really got over him, or never stopped measuring yourself by him. But you know what? You can use this as a way to finally break free of him altogether. You should start your life now, really, without him - as a romantic aspect or as a point to measure how you are doing. You can do it!
2006-12-30 16:40:57 · answer #3 · answered by starlet_8 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At that point in his life maybe you were. Once you were divorced that obviously changed. I think it bothers you because it made you feel special and now it has been taken away from you and that sentiment given to his soon to be wife. She is the love of his life now. This is not meant as a slam to you. Since we are human and have egos they tend to get bruised from time to time. You will be okay. Wish the best for him and move on.
P.S. He didn't lie to you. People change and things change. You didn't say why you divorced. Which also may have played a role.
2006-12-31 01:19:21 · answer #4 · answered by AngelWings 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure he wasn't lying to you. He likely felt at the time that you really were the love of his life, as I'm sure you felt the same if you both loved each other enough to get married. Going through a divorce is hard and there will be little things like that, that will get to you becuase you're so accustomed to being "his". Keep yourself occupied and concentrate on your life and the things you have that are important. I'm sure the feeling will pass in time.
2006-12-30 16:40:07 · answer #5 · answered by sarahjaniepoo 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it is because you are still attached, it's hard not to once you have been married to a person, believe me I have been thru the ringer with mine, and still I keep coming back for more, some things you never get over completely, GOOD LUCK i hope you realize the love of your life, then you will never feel that feeling again !!!!!!!
2006-12-30 16:59:35 · answer #6 · answered by hmwh_mwc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because once you've had that marital bond it seems like a smack in the face for him to tell another woman what he once told you because you felt as if he would never say it to another woman but as time moves on then feelings change he's bound to say some of the same things to her. Because even though you move on if you were married to him once then it's almost like a part of you is gone even though you don't want him. I've experienced that.
2006-12-30 16:44:43 · answer #7 · answered by 2sweet4u 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Seems like your ex-husband needs to grow up and determine if contestant number 1, 2, or 3 is the love of his life.
It's s a good thing he is your ex-husband. Forget about him, keep your head high and go find yourself a good man!!
2006-12-30 16:40:30 · answer #8 · answered by nowhere 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
because u know how fragile his love for you was , u mourn what it could have been, u see if this new person can also be the love of his life, than u feel what he felt for u wasn't real. u still love him, and seeing him feel the same for her as he once felt for u hurts alot. u have to stop reliving your past, u have to let go of the past before u can rebuild your future, u are upset that he can move on so easily and just forget u so easily.
2006-12-31 02:19:42 · answer #9 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You feel bad because YOU really loved HIM.
And have not come to grips that he 'never' really loved you in return.
IF you were 'really' the love of his life there would 'never' have
been a devorce between you.
The only other possibility that you feel so bad is, were you unfaithful to him, and now sorry for what you did.
And if not unfaithful, were you the one to instigate the devorce
and was he the one who 'really' loved you instead?
Only 'YOU' can answer this question really.
2006-12-30 19:10:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe it's the feeling of being 'second best'. Since you WERE the love of his life (previously), and you both have since moved on, well...I think it's that feeling that you are no longer 'the one'. You can still have feelings for this guy, even though you've moved on, but I think deep down, when you guys were close, (and together) you cherished that feeling of being the love of HIS life, and it made you feel good, at the time.
I think that feeling will pass, if you've moved on and have found someone you love, deeply.
2006-12-30 16:41:27 · answer #11 · answered by argamedius 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋