I recently posted a question about my boyfriend. Short version...his father has cancer and I selfishly ask for more attention. Now I've thought about it and I realize that I've been stupid. But now we're in this big fight and he won't answer my calls. The truth is I don't know how to help him. I don't know how to help him deal with his father's illness. I think sometimes I just make things worse for him. I think about just letting him go...so that he can deal with everything without me getting in the way. But I'm not sure if he wants that too. I don't know if it would really help the situation or just hurt him more. And I really don't know how to talk to him about anything because I don't know what to say. I mean what do you say to a person who knows they are about to lose their father? And if we stay together, how do we keep this realtionship strong when the both of us are so weak right now? How can I help him without being so selfish?
2006-12-30 15:50:24 · 7 answers · asked by heatherandbrian1826 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Give him some time to cool off. You know? You're not in the position to help him --the best way is to back off for a while and wait for him. Hope for the best, that everythin will turn out okay and well. Don't let him go yet! If you do, you'll feel worse about it and regret it after (because you'll feel like it was too soon).
After some time has passed...if I was you I'd go up to him in person and say hey. If you can't do that...then you have no choice but to e-mail/call him again. I don't suggest e-mailing if he doesn't read his e-mails.
2006-12-30 16:00:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
little things can mean a lot
if you notice that he hasn't been eating right bring him some dinner or take care of his laundry.
something like that will let him know you care without having to get in his way and this will maybe free up a little of his time so the two of you can talk.
2006-12-31 00:00:27 · answer #2 · answered by Aviator1013 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure that he needs you and what you have to offer him. He is just trying to keep moving no matter what direction he's heading in it lessens the pain. Stay, Be Available, Let him know you care,and Give him time to come you. Most importantly
PRAY
2006-12-31 00:16:07 · answer #3 · answered by Deezie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st of all u do sound selfish and u need to let him know u are here if he needs u and when he does be there. it is very hard to loose a father
2006-12-31 00:09:04 · answer #4 · answered by KIM B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everything that you have asked us, write it down in a letter and send it to him. If he needs his space, give it to him. It is hard to have a family member sick and have to try to balance your own life. Just let him know that you are there for him if he needs you.
Good Luck!
Q
2006-12-30 23:56:17 · answer #5 · answered by quinlangal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
all i can say is just be there for him. let him know that you are there for him. my sister went through that and it was hard. just be there for what ever he needs.
2006-12-30 23:57:46 · answer #6 · answered by Michele G 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can't. so just go with the flow. what happens happens, you nkow?
2006-12-30 23:54:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋