There is a man out here on Yahoo Answers that is leaving his pregnant wife, and they have 3 kids already. He confesses to womanizing for 13 out of the 15 years of marriage, and has decided to leave her because she relied on family to help get her through all the B.S. he put her through, but now her family hates him because of it. I don't want to judge this man's situation, but it does prompt me to ask fellow Yahoo'ers out there that if you've left your spouse (kids involved), looking back, has it truly been worth it? What has been your experience and challenges in doing so?
2006-12-30 14:42:32 · 9 answers · asked by julesl68 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Please keep the answers coming. I know that some of this is difficult and painful to share, so I really appreciate it.
2006-12-30 14:56:41 · update #1
I kicked my spouse out of our home 3 years ago. We have two children ages 15 & 13 now. I am 35 now. It was a big mistake. I fell "out of love" and didn't really want to try. I was also partying with my neighbors and started dating one of the neighbors brother immediately. I realize now that I split up my family because of a so-called mid life crisis. We are both now remarried to other people and my children's lives will never be the same. Both kids blame me for everything. I have to live with this for the rest of my life - ruining my children's perfect family. IT IS NOT WORTH IT! To look into my kid's eyes and still see pain almost 3 years later is hard.
2006-12-30 14:54:14 · answer #1 · answered by mscpa1999 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes it was worth it. Children make it through divorce ok when there is much conflict in the home. Both of my children feel that Daddy and Mom are both better people not living with one another.
Challenges?? Wow, financial situation, raising children and trying to give them all the love for both partners as well as disciplining them and teaching them that we are all responsible for controlling our feelings and ourselves regardless of the situation around us.
Its very hard to hold down 2 jobs and still be available to your children in the way they need you to be. Divorce is not for lazy people who won't put out the energy to do the very best possible job of raising their children. It is not for self centered people who are only doing it to find someone more self gratifying.
If you leave you have to know up front that the needs of your children come first,, anything you want is secondary until they are grown.
2006-12-30 22:47:40 · answer #2 · answered by yeller 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My father was like this guy and worse. He is now in the final stages of cancer and he doesn't seem to regret a thing. He has not been there for his children and even though he has not seen 3 of them for the past 10 years, he is making no effort to reconnect with them.
Some men are too selfish to care.
2006-12-30 22:50:11 · answer #3 · answered by Jennifer D 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes he will,but the children will bounce back. They seem to have a way of doing that,it is better he is out of the house than for them to constantly listen to any arguing and such. I wish her good luck with the upcoming baby and hope she gets a good lawyer and makes him pay for everything,but I am a ex so I would be more likly to say that huh....anyway I wish her and the kids well and him to get his head out of his lower extremities and possibly fall into ED and have to live with that the rest of his days.
2006-12-30 23:14:07 · answer #4 · answered by grbarnaba 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i left my ex because of his cheating, and other things, i miss my home, i miss my old job, but made the right decision by leaving a cheater. since my divorce i have a better life now, and wouldn't trade it for what i had. however i still have some grief issues, hurt due to being used and treated unfairly.
2006-12-30 22:50:17 · answer #5 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's very lucky to have him leave and be able to salvage what is left of her life.
2006-12-30 23:10:19 · answer #6 · answered by mosaic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He'll regret it on his deathbed, but not before. He's too busy focussing on his own needs.
2006-12-30 22:47:25 · answer #7 · answered by S K 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
i think he probably be doing her a great favor.
2006-12-30 22:48:38 · answer #8 · answered by kim 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think so!
2006-12-30 23:19:35 · answer #9 · answered by tim b 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋