Do you think gay people are born that way or choose to be gay?

Question

I have had such a struggle and I can't help being gay. It is not a life choice we make, it's something we are born with and you can't choose who you'll be attracted to.

So I want to know your opinion and tell me what you have always thought.

Answer 1

Not only do I think that people are born gay, but many scientific studies have shown that being gay is biological and genetic in nature.

The only choice gay people make about being gay is either living a lie and pretending to be straight, living in the closet, or living an open and honest life.

Answer 2

When I was born I wasn't sexual at all. About the time puberty started kicking in without any outside influence, trauma, or any of the other BS supposed reasons those who say it's a choice purport, I found myself physically attracted to manly men. I do think it is innate. Those who say you choose are ignorant. To suggest such a thing would mean that they have the capability to turn on the gay or straight switch. Sorry, but I go forward, never straight. I know there are people who are bisexual, and those are the lucky ones. They get the best of both worlds but I'm content with my orientation and live a happy and productive life. Yes, I have a life, I don't have a lifestyle. Thank you for your time.

Answer 3

you are gay for the same reason the guy beside you is straight. Neithe rof you made a conscious choice. It was not a matter of waking up one day and saying "Yes, I will be straight (or gay)". It is just the way you are; a part of your inner self and there is really nothing you or anyone else can do about it. It is just as hard to try to make a straight guy be gay as it is to make an elephant into a sheep.

Thus never let anyone's bias bother you; by spouting iintolerence, bigotry and hatred they are merely displaying their total ignorance of life an living. They hav eno desire for anyone who does not fit their tight little mold and they will put down people for their religion, gender, sexual orientation, racial origin, disabilities and anything else that is outside their own narrow realm of knowledge and understanding. and those who use the bible to condemn others while they eat shellfish, wear garments of mixed fabrics and have sex with their gf's while their wife is at home with the kids, are the worst ones. Noit only are they prejudiced beyond belief but they are hypocritical and taking the bible and distorting it for their own purposes much like many people did to prove blacks were inferior and should be kept enslaved.

So, despiute the weirdness of others, know tha tyou are yourself, try to be the best person you can and darn well marry the person of yoru choice (assuming they want to marry you too tha tis - hehe).

Answer 4

I answered this somewhere else, but here it is again, my stance on things:

I actually don't believe that we are born with a predetermined sexual orientation. There are too many people who find their sexual preferences changing over time for this to be true, in my opinion.

I do believe, however, that you don't per se CHOOSE/LEARN to be gay. You don't wake up one day and say "Geez, I think I'll eschew women and go for men instead." But just because you didn't choose it doesn't mean it's biologically a part of you, you know? It's not something you can change, I feel. Take this example, for instance- you are a cat lover. You just love your pet kitties. Never been a dog person, thanks. You just know for sure that you wouldn't ever want to own a dog. So, someone says- you choose to love cats. Well, no, you reply, not really. I mean, I just like cats. I've always been that way. Does that mean, then, that there is a cat-loving gene in your body? Of course not. It means that this is a preference in your mind, one that you cannot consciously change, but is not innate, either.

I think that human sexuality is immensely more complex than the labels we have today like gay and straight. I also believe that love is gender blind and a straight man can find himself falling in love with another man, still completely attracted to women and utterly not attracted to men, but emotionally and sexually satisfied with that one man he loves. Our sexual desires come from our personalities, our past experiences, our childhoods, socialization, and more. It's a heady, deliciously messy mix of everything, and it gives us all that's wonderful about our sexuality today, so diverse.

That's my stance on things. I know that a lot of gay/bisexual people claim they are born that way, and I understand why they feel that way. For them, the claim feels true. In my opinion, a lot of straight people call it a choice so they don't have to ask hard questions about God (creating that which He supposedly hates?) and their source of intolerance (how can you hate something that someone never chose to be, like skin color, or, in this case, sexual orientation?). Like I said, I think it's neither, but I don't mind people claiming they were born gay. Just as long as they don't say that all gay people were born gay, or all straight people were born straight, etc., etc.- until they have scientific proof to back that up.

Answer 5

I think that gay people are born that way....they don't choose to be that way, if you look closely at children's behavior, you can usually tell from about the age of 4. I have a cousin, who I could see from around that age, a friend's son, who happened to be a bully, but was the most loving child to me anyway, he came out to me at 15 , and now I have my nephew's son, who I am not sure has noticed yet, but I have, will also be gay....love them all anyway....but, as far as someone choosing to be a homosexual, I think it would be masochistic to say the least, who would choose a life where you have to constantly hide or watch over your shoulder for the not so tolerating homophobics....It's not a choice it's the way God made you, be happy and proud of who you are....

Answer 6

I believe they most likely are born that way. Brad's logic is flawed in this way---genetics are much more complicated than that.
For example, nobody in my family but me has growth hormone deficiency(in my case, late onset at age 9.) It's caused by a minor change in one gene on the 17th chromosome. That happened out of the blue. Any genetic change can happen that way, and they're not all detrimental or "disordered." Yet GHD doesn't"go against the laws of breeding," nor is it deadly. If GH response and/or deficiency are genetic, then it would only follow that pheromone(look it up) response would be.

I see being LGBT as no different from my being of short stature. It is what it is, and I'm proud to be small. They are who they are, and should take pride in that. There is nothing disordered or wrong with either one of those two. Like the gal above me said, you're born with it, so love yourself!

Answer 7

I don't understand why everyone is always debating this issue!? Why should gay people have to defend their sexuality (esp. to others who only want to judge and condemn them). No one chooses to be straight...it just happens naturally; the same is true for being gay. People have different needs and desires (it has been that way since the world began). Society is what tells us that something is "abnormal" or taboo (but that doesn't change who we are inside). Live and let live...

Answer 8

You're born with it. Love yourself. It's not a disease or something unnatural.

In the womb, all people start out as females and then, if you're meant to be male, you develop male parts and the mind-set.

I think that it's at that stage where your sexual orientation, physical gender, and gender mind-set are determined by some higher being.

I don't know how much scientific evidence supports this, but from what I've learned, it seems to show it.

There are homosexual animals. Like those homosexual male penguins at some zoo who've adopted another penguin (no I didn't make that up, Google it). It's rather cute.

Answer 9

born that at the age of 9 i noticed that i loved hang around boys more than girls at 16 teen had my very first time with another boy he was 18[my ex babysitter brother] he was very hot any im 45 married to a wonderful man 24 years we have been together not the same guy as above adopted 3 girls one of them is getting married i the spring,,,,,,[and have never been with a woman i like them as friends but just do not find the attractive

Answer 10

Call me flippant, but I neither know nor do I care. I am Bi and that's an end to it.

Of course there is the whole genetic proposition, the biochemical (ante-natal hormonal) proposition - the number of older male siblings being a version of that, the nurture question (too strong a female role model, absentee father...)...

However, when all is said and done, I am me. No amount of Hypnosis or aversion therapy or counselling is going to change that. So I wouldn't even argue that it was a decision I took in my deep sub-conscious.