Lost my lover and soul-mate over four month's ago and each day seems like it was just yesteday it's not easy at all. Help me find way
to fill this void?
2006-12-30 02:00:12 · 14 answers · asked by Rich goldie 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Four months is not really a very long time to heal such a wound.
A good way to take your mind off your own problems is to go out and to help others. You could try volunteering, especially with less fortunate people. This won't take away your hurt, but it will distract you from obsessing over your wounds while they take time to heal properly.
2006-12-30 02:14:49 · answer #1 · answered by Kedar 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
You don't mention whether the loss was due to death or separation of another sort. That might make some difference in how best to approach healing. In any case, at four months you are barely past denial, guilt and anger, barely into the acceptance phase. Don't rush grieving. It is painful but serves a real and vital purpose. Go with the flow. Take very good care of yourself. Seek the counsel and support of friends. When ready begin looking for that new relationship if you desire one. Healing will come in time. Count on it. Meanwhile be kind to yourself and others. Here's wishing you all the best in the new year and throughout life.
2006-12-30 13:19:52 · answer #2 · answered by Seeker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear that. I am not gay, but I know what you are going through...I think. (I don't presume to know what goes on in the life of a gay man, but feelings are feelings)
I went through a divorce six years ago that crushed me. It hurt so bad that I turned to the bottle and drowned my sorrows for over a year. But then I met someone new and she turned my life around. She is now my wife.
The only thing I can tell you is to sit down with a piece of paper and write down what you felt went wrong in the relationship. Did you do something wrong? Did he? Or was it just that you two were not compatible? Try to write down what you would have done differently and why. It sounds silly, but its a way to put your feelings down in a tangible way. I can also tell you that rolling in sorrow does not work, it only makes you feel worse. Keep yourself occupied by reading all the books of a favorite author, take up painting, learn how to scuba dive, work on some projects around the house. Just keep working on extracurricular things and try to dwell on the past as little as possible. It will go away in time.
2006-12-30 10:10:42 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK i lost my relationship of 19 years, so let go of the past all the money in the world wont change it, don't expect miracles to happen if something bad happened in the relationship, You need to move on, keep yourself busy, visit with a lot of friends and go places where there are a lot of people so that you will have someone to talk to or visit with, keep busy find a hobby, maybe "Mr right" is right around the corner or the guy that sells you the newspaper. There is someone who loves you and you don't even know it.
2006-12-30 12:02:33 · answer #4 · answered by jumpinjackdw 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The void wiill always be there. It's just that given time it'll be less significant. Hang in there.
2006-12-30 10:05:41 · answer #5 · answered by unclefrunk 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps, you can try visiting the cocktail lounge and mingle with other people.
Smile, laugh and be merry, because, it will be a new year.
Good Luck.
2006-12-30 12:55:32 · answer #6 · answered by embassydiplomat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a life and move on
2006-12-31 01:00:36 · answer #7 · answered by markandharold1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know how ya feel, i lost mine 14 months ago and it still screws me up, just gotta battle on.
2006-12-30 10:04:14 · answer #8 · answered by poodle 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hey I know how you feel...except I kindof brought it on myself. anyway just stick in there, go out with friends, find a new hobby...you'll be ok hun
2006-12-30 10:02:44 · answer #9 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Mingle.
2006-12-30 10:02:25 · answer #10 · answered by spir_i_tual 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋