Habitual Problem. Habits depressing Me.?

Question

I have some of the bad habit ?
I am 20, graphics designer, earning in well. I am alone, when I was 10, I have lost my parent. I have some of the bad habit, my personal life is going to be disturb by this habits. Please Help to remove them from my mind.


1 Bad habit of spending Money
2 Bad habit of smoking
3 Bad habit of spending on movies
4 Bad habit of Not doing work at time.

I don't know why but I don't care of money, I don't love money. But Now when I have no money, I realise my mistake. But don't know any thing about money management. Please Teach me money management. How to u all people manage in their less salary, and why I can't save it. Please Help

Answer 1

Try to tackle one habit at a time and give it your all. Start with the easiest, don't give up then move on to the next.

Answer 2

I can see what your saying. Self-discipline is what you want. The money situation. I messed it up too. My husband taught me the importance of "looking over the bills each and every day."

It trained my mind to be aware of it at all times. This really helped.

The other "habits" : force yourself to "think before you act." Use a kitchen timer when you can. Wait 5 minutes, and say the consequences out loud. This replaces the old habits, with new ones.

It takes 20 days to form and "new" habit. So, practice each day and it will become automatic.

Answer 3

LOL just because you have a few bad habits doesn't mean you need to seek help. The guy above me is a retard.. I know lots of people that have all those habits and they dont need any help at all.. If ur not happy with the way your living than make a change, if you cant than I guess you'll have to live with it...

SINKA IS Retarded!!!!!!(Based on his answer)

Answer 4

These are not habits, these are symptoms. They tell you that something is not right on a deeper level. Please seek help.

Answer 5

Bear in mind that I may not know what I'm talking about, but I'm going to offer my take on your situation based only on the information you gave (obviously):

First, the smoking thing is a separate issue. Don't lump that in with the money thing. When it comes to smoking I do know that people sometimes come to rely on it in order to have additional control over thoughts they'd prefer stay "tucked away". I imagine other substances can do the same thing, but I know smoking can give someone a "boost" when it comes to being in control of troubling thoughts.

First, you're only 20 years old. Did you know there's a chance your brain isn't even finished developing yet? The pre-frontal cortex can take into the early- to mid-twenties to finish maturing. Because you're young you are going to have some youthful behaviors, so don't be too hard on yourself.

If you lost a parent early you probably grew up feeling kind of short-changed. Since you're young and alone now there's a chance you have some emotional need(s) not met (either in your present situation or from the past). If you feel kind of "blah" (even depressed) you could be spending money in an attempt to feel a little uplifted just for the moment. In other words, if you're "blah" or even clinically depressed that could cause your behavior. It may not be that the behaviors are causing the depression.

Throw in that you have no money, and that, in itself, is depressing.

What I have learned about money is this: When a person is kind of "blah" or depressed (it doesn't have to be horrible depression; it can just be low-level/lack of joy kind of depression) for a long time he may know it isn't a "chemical imbalance". He may know its his life that is making him feel depressed. As a result, he may not want to go get anti-depressants or see a counselor.

What can happen, though, is as the person waits for his life to get better he still feels blah. Eventually, he can reach a "saturation point" where he just feels he can't care any more and has to take some action to make himself feel better. He may know, in his head, how to manage money. He can't care about it, though. He feels that "good money management rules" are for people who aren't at this emotional saturation point.

He can feel its his money, and he's going to use it for a good cause (which is to spend on something that will make him feel better; and he justifies it by saying, "Its a lot cheaper than spending on a psychologist and anti-depressants; and there are no physical side-effects."

No matter how happy someone's childhood has been, though, people of your age get to a point where they've spent most of their life being a kid and doing what adults say to do. At your age, people get to feel they have their own money and will, once and for all, get to do some things and buy some things that they want (and they don't have to answer to anybody). Its something so many college-aged kids and new-to-the-work-world people do.

Sometimes, too, because someone doesn't "love" money they just don't have enough emotion invested in it to give a hoot about it when it comes to spending.

Not doing work on time is a different thing again. Not being able to get yourself moving could be a sign of depression; or it could be a bad habit. You can decide - here and now - that you will make sure you get each step of work done as it shows up. You can decide you need to be kind of compulsive about it for now, and as you get used to your new habit it will become more natural for you.

When it comes to money you have to muster up enough self-discipline to put a certain amount into savings with every paycheck. When it comes to finances, things tend to either be spiralling in a good direction or spiralling in a bad direction. What you need to do is get some spiralling in good directions. With a few different "spirals" going you will gradually find your financial situation improving.

If you spend on a pack of cigarettes a day, try to cut down to five packs in a week. Try to limit the movies. Decide you will allow yourself x number of movies in a week and don't deviate. Find something else to do that doesn't cost money. If that means straightening out closets or vacuuming or cleaning your car, do those things. Not only will you not be spending money, but you'll be getting cleaning up to date as well.

You essentially have three separate issues to deal with: smoking, finances, and not getting the work done. You aren't alone in these behaviors.

Having financial trouble, though, can wear away at your mood and make getting work done on time harder to do. You may want to consult a counselor and get a reading on whether you have genuine depression or whether you're just miserable because your life isn't in control.

If you have a bunch of bills (credit card bills?) get them all together and write down each one on a sheet of paper, and include the amount owed and the monthly payment. Having it all in one place helps you see what you're dealing with. Figure out how much you can pay towards whatever bills you have and stick with that. Keeping a solid payment history (even if its minimum amounts) will help you keep your credit from getting worse ruined.
If you have way to much to deal with talk with a debt consolidation agency and see what kind of program they have.

If there's a way to get a loan and pay off all old bills and just have the one loan payment you could try doing that. The old bills would be paid, and you could keep the loan payments up-to-date. You could make sure there's no penalty for paying it early, and try to pay extra lumps over the course of the loan.

Maybe even forget about quitting smoking for the next six months until you get the rest of your life in order.

If you can get so you start to see a spiral in a positive financial direction you'll start to get some sense of pleasure from seeing that, and you could find it makes you feel better than spending does. Aside from vowing to set aside x amount for savings out of every check, always ask yourself this when you're about to do something with money: "Is this contributing to a positive spiral or a negative spiral?" Even if you can't resist temptation this time around, get in the habit of asking that question. After a while, it may "take effect" a little.

Money management in a nutshell is this: You can't spend more than you make, and you need to keep building a savings cushion.

Something else is this: If you have credit cards you want to aim to reduce the balance because this will "spiral" your available credit rather tha "spiral" your debt. You may not want to use the available credit, but just having more available credit and a savings cushion will place you in a better position than you are now.

People on less salary have to budget, and they usually look for bargains when they buy groceries or other things. They often do find the store with the lowest prices, and even then they may buy store brand items. Sometimes store brand isn't quite as good, but the savings are worth it to some people.

If you make it a point not to eat out too often and instead to keep food in (even if it isn't fancy food) you'll save money. Keep the basics - bread, produce, milk, cheese, juice, cereals. Frozen diners always cost more. Produce and canned and frozen vegetables are inexpensive. Pasta and sauce are inexpensive. If you like to have the occasional sweets buy one box per week.

You can also go on a temporary savings plan when it comes to buying things like soap and shampoo. Live with the .99 cent versions for a month. It won't kill you, and later you can go back to buying your preferred brand.

When it comes to money, every little thing you do can make a difference. Save, pay down credit balances, pay less for stuff you buy, cut back just some on whatever else you spend on.

If at all possible, try to jump start your savings with, say, $100. After that you could try to just put $20 away from each paycheck for a while. If you have credit cards, try to send one of them a bigger chunk each month. Alternate on who gets the bigger chunk. You'll see a difference fairly soon.

Are you aware that you can get some movies and CD's at public libraries?

Well, that's all I have..... Good luck. Don't be too hard on yourself. You are, by no means, alone - and, again, you're young.
So often newly grown people have reached that saturation point of not being able to do what they want, so when they work and are able to they have trouble resisting temptation..