Christians only what makes your marraige so strong?

Question

I am married a long time.. What makes your marraige so strong and solid? How do you become really close friends. I had very bad cramps and snapped and yelled at my hsuband of course I said I was sorry. Does sex get more important in marraige as time goes on or less important? What in your opinion makes a godly strong marraige?

Answer 1

I love your question. It's a good one.

Before my husband and I got married we were best friends for over a year. A good marriage for us includes a lot of things. There have been times where we both truly wanted to divorce and 'just get on with our lives', but we learned to be a united front. We've learned that it's important to work together in pretty much every way. We aren't afraid to apologize. We're not perfect and don't pretend to be. Where one leaves off, the other one picks up the slack. We are both Christians and share a common love for our Savior, and do the best we can to treat each other with kindness and love. We talk our problems out. We find a solution and work towards it together. We make all major decisions together. We don't keep secrets. We each give without expecting something in return. Marriage (for us) is not 50/50. It's 100/100. For us, having common goals and working towards those goals together makes us even closer. It's been over 18 years since we got married. I didn't think it was possible to love him any more than I did the day I married him, but I was wrong. I love him more every day. I think I'm the happiest woman I know!

Answer 2

First I am not married, but in any relationship there has to be give and take. No one will agree on everything so there must be compromise. As for sex I think that would depend on the person, I myself have a very high sex drive but my girlfriend does not. We tend to cuddle more than anything and although it gets difficult, I am patient and know that thats just the way it is. It's a commitment thing. And more than anything I try to put God first, if we know and understand that then our own little problems don't seem so big anymore.

Answer 3

My husband and I pray together everyday. We also work on communication and forgiveness with one another. It also helps to be able to laugh at your own personal mistakes instead of getting defensive. For us we realize our marriage is a joint effort and we are in it together not against each other. Also being able to say sorry and accept your mates apology and forgive and forget, helps. Sex is important in a marriage because it allows the marriage mates an opportunity to be affectionate and express your love in a more intimate way for the other, and I feel it's an important benefit of being married regardless of how long you have been married.

Answer 4

My husband and I were friends first. In many ways we are still like teenagers, we laugh and play together. We talk about everything do stuff just to spend time together. Sex has its ups and downs, we want more than we get but we have young children, a very small house, and he often works nights. There are dry spells but when we have it, it's wonderful.

I think what makes our marriage strong though is that we appreciate each other. We know that God has blessed us. I am thankful for him and he is thankful for me. We balance each other. As we have grown in our faith our marriage has been strengthened as well.

Answer 5

Barring a physical impairment, sex is a barometer of a marriage. It is an expression of your "oneness." I don't believe it ever ceases to be important. Though the quantity may decline at times, the quality should improve with time.

I believe what makes a marriage strong is the commitment of both parties to become the husband/wife God wants them to be. Sometimes it's hard to be godly toward your spouse when he does something hurtful or insensitive. If my behavior reflects my service to God rather than what my husband deserves at that particular moment. That makes it easier to be gracious and to be the sort of person I want to be - to be proactive instead of reactive.

When we are reactive in relationships, responding in kind to what others do, then our relationships succumb to the lowest common denominator. Worse, even though I may be able to rationalize retaliating, I'll feel guilty because I will have done something that I don't want to characterize me (like yelling or losing my temper). The guilt becomes a vicious cycle. I'll feel guilty and lousy about my behavior, angry at my spouse for inciting it, and that will lead me to more reactive behavior.

The trick is to be gracious - not because I don't want to look bad or because my husband necessarily has earned it - but because gracious is what I am striving for. It is my service to God. Because I refuse to let anyone else's bad behavior keep me from being who I want to be.

It's not easy. And I'll be the first to admit that I don't do it perfectly, but that's what I'm striving for. And I believe God helps me do that when I put my trust in Him rather than trusting my own goodness.

Answer 6

I haven't been married very long, but I find making a date night with my husband helps and a prayer time where we both spend time with the Lord. We learned these pricinples at the Family Life Weekend to Remember. There are a lot of things that make a marriage, but there are hard times too. We loved the conference if you are interested and we both learned a lot about each other.

http://www.familylife.com/conferences/marriage.asp

Answer 7

I'm not Christian, and my partner died from cancer 6 years ago, but what kept our partnership/"marriage" strong was open communication and mutual respect. Sex became less important, but cuddling and caring remained ever crucial.\

God can get in the way in a marriage, because you can begin to be judgmental toward your husband or wife when they stray from what you consider a godly path. Without God, you can take a more objective look at what's going on.

As it turned out, we each had bouts of cancer in the 12 years we were together. I recovered, but sadly he didn't. The partnership remained strong to the end.

Answer 8

We been married 37 years, we fight argue and make up. Never go to bed anhty with each other. Sex is less important to us. We are two that are together physically, emotionally, and spiritually. God has done a work in our lives. a2J

Answer 9

in my opinion, sex grows less important as times goes on. whats important is having a strong friendship for the marriage to last.

Answer 10

Sorry honey, Secular regulation trumps any god's regulation. i'm not quite particular what something else of your ramble is about, yet we do have somewhat something referred to as equivalent rights right here in u . s . of america. If one crew of folk can marry, then the different crew of folk should manage to marry. Technically, marriage (in u . s . of america) is a criminal settlement between 2 human beings. perchance all "marriages" should be seen civil unions. and those who opt for non secular ceremonies may have them in accordance to their non secular perspectives. yet do not disallow one crew of folk a correct that's guaranteed through the structure. i'd like each and every man or woman to imagine for a minute, if yet another crew of folk, say those who've blond hair, are singled out and advised that they could't marry because they are blond. it really is a life like simile, when you consider that blond hair is genetic an same way sexual orientation is genetic.