come on...you have to be at least somewhat attracted to a person for a relationship to work out, yet so many people are immediately labelled shallow for not wanting to date a seriously ugly person. (i hope i have not offended anyone)
2006-12-29 15:05:28 · 18 answers · asked by innit_x 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
because you can be attracted to someone and not be attracted to their looks. You can love the way they act, talk, walk, their personality (as gay as it sounds, its all true) You dont have to love someones looks to truly love someone. Aside from the fact that even if you marry someone good looking, ppl change when they are happily married, and could become fat and ugly in life.
2006-12-29 15:10:18 · answer #1 · answered by countrygirl66032 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, I know exactly what you mean. There was this girl I went out with once, I estimate she weighed 80 lbs more than me. She was fairly ugly too and she had a terrible personality. I didn't turn her down because I didn't want to be shallow. What a mistake that was! I used to get sick thinking about her. So yeah, sometimes there just isn't any way to deal with it. I don't appreciate when people call me shallow for having some reasonable ideals. What got me was when someone called a guy who didn't want to date single mothers shallow. That's not shallowness, it's good sense!
Now I also see women taking their shallowness a bit too far. I mean, some will turn a guy down over ANYTHING. I saw one woman who said she didn't like a guy because his toenails looked funny. Seriously, they couldn't be that bad could they? Or people who don't like other people's eye color or hair color. Or women who will not date any man who isn't a foot taller than them (seriously! I could understand that they don't want guys shorter than them, but that's asking a bit much). Others will think twice about dating a man with a penis less than 7 or 8 inches long (which is way above average). I think those people are all very shallow. At best, they are unreasonably picky.
But sometimes, people try to apply the label to others when it just doesn't fit. I mean, everyone wants to date a decent person -- not a slob or a freak! Good night!
2006-12-29 23:19:56 · answer #2 · answered by anonymous 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It all depends on your character really, as a person. IF your the type of person who likes to get to know a person EVEN though there not the most attractive person before you make a judgment. Then that's more of logical aspect of knowing the person. But if you don't like the personality of that person AND you think there ugly then, physically That's more of a reason to not be interested in dating them. But if that person is nice, sweet but just plain ugly you might want to date them causally to get to know them but if the whole not judge a book by its cover thing doesn't work out and there physical appearance is just a BIG issue then don't date them at all. Because in a relationship there is also the intimate part and if your not attracted to that person then how are you supposed to be intimate with that person??? So its all up on your character as a person. IF your more of a heart and soul and personality go for it. IF your more of a intimate, looks(physical attractiveness)heart person then that will not go well. But if the person isn't THAT UGLY or like you can at least look at the person type of person then just go for it make it a casual date see how it turns out you might like there personality and then maybe find them attractive who knows...you know what they say "love is blind" ..........
2006-12-29 23:35:42 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The ugly person might be someone else to another. You could be shallow because you seriously rejected that dude. I mean if you said, "Sorry, but I can't date an ugly person." That is a shallow person.
2006-12-29 23:09:28 · answer #4 · answered by Person 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well.."ugly" is a very shallow word to use. In the future, please just use unnattractive? Since yes....i did take offense to this. But no..you do have to be attracted to someone but i also learned from experience that people grow on you once you get to know them and their inner beauty begins to show on the outside. You don't have to listen or agree, but just ponder the thought. Would you ever consider going on one date to someone who looked decent enough to see if you'd even have a good time? If you wouldn't consider it, just for fun or experience and because itll make you look bad (ppl looking at you)..then my dear..i bow down to the shallowness.
2006-12-29 23:13:21 · answer #5 · answered by * Kittles * 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seriously i have been labeled shallow for not wanting to go out w/ some dude who got on my nerves so bad that it was unreal and he was so desprate that he actually started telling people thet we were going out and he was a huge nerd who was seriuosly ugly,, but from what i have experienced its because they dont have anything better to gripe about and people always seem to find some inperfection in you , even if they would do the same thing they stilll call you a shallow b**ch or thats what i was labeled for a couple years, i do seriously wonder why poeple cant just realize that maybe you want to be atracted to your date not annoyed by him
2006-12-29 23:19:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ugh! I know what you mean... There MUST be some kind of physical attraction, no doubt. I mean, you can get to know someone even if they aren't very appealing, don't just block them out because they ain't eye candy, but you can't be called shallow for not wanting to be with them!
2006-12-29 23:13:48 · answer #7 · answered by Naters 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just b-cuz someone is ugly or not doesnt affect how a relationship will work out. you may start out thinking that a person is ugly, but as you get to kno them, you start to like them more, and find them more attractive. and in that, it just goes to show that everyone has an inner beauty. you just have to know the person to see it!
2006-12-29 23:08:29 · answer #8 · answered by frito 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's simple...a really nice person that you are not attracted to is called a friend. You are only shallow if you can't see past the exterior to see that person's good qualities...doesn't necessarily mean that you need to be physically attracted to him/her.
2006-12-29 23:15:29 · answer #9 · answered by AK 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're absolutely not "shallow" for not wanting to date someone you're not attracted to. Attraction is a science. We are attracted to eachother through biology, so we have desire to mate and procreate.
Not being attracted to someone is just natures way of telling you not to mate with that person.
2006-12-29 23:13:02 · answer #10 · answered by Ashley 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋