A young priest was taking confession in a convent school for the first time.
"Bless me, Father, for I have sinned," says the first schoolgirl, "I had impure thoughts about my teacher."
"Impure thoughts - that's four Hail Mary's," says the priest.
"Bless me, Father," says the second schoolgirl. "I stole a pencil from the stationery cupboard."
"Stealing - that's six Hail Marys," says the priest.
But the third schoolgirl says, "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. I gave my boyfriend a bl*w job behind the bike sheds."
The priest is flummoxed - he's never heard this before, and he doesn't know what penance to impose. Slipping out of the confessional, he meets one of the nuns in the chapel. "Quick, Sister Lillian," he whispers. "What does Father Patrick usually give for a bl*w job?
"20 quid," she replies :)
2006-12-29 11:20:58 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
RUMUODANI - by the questions you are asking on Yahoo - you sure need to grow up!!! :) :) :)
2006-12-29 11:51:16 · update #1
Mr Kite.....If you drop a blonde and a brunette 100ftm which hits the ground first?
The Brunette - the blonde has to ask directions on the way down :)
2006-12-29 12:27:42 · update #2
good joke fidgetyfingers pity about the comedian why don't they post there jokes instead of spoiling other peoples 10/10
2006-12-30 04:58:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
LoL!!!!! I had a good laugh there. Let me repay your kindness with...what else...a blond joke...
In a Sky jumping school, all students were readying for their very first jump. Naturally, all were excited and nervous. With their plane aloft at 8,000 ft, the Jump Master made a final reminder:
So girls and boys, this is it!. Remember what I've been telling you all along...forget your 'Altimeter'...on your descent when you see People on the ground starts to look like Ants, that's the time you open your chute...OK? Everybody nodded.
A little while later, all 20 students were out of the plane. One by one, their chutes began to pop up like mushrooms over the sky...except for Blond jumper. To the horror of her jump mates and the crowds below, blond jumper chute didn't open and she went free falling to the ground. Thud!!!
>>>Fast Forward to Heaven's Gate, with St. Peter screening all new comers>>>
Blond's turn now:
ST. PETER: So, what are you IN for?
BLOND: We'll.. I fell from a plane
ST. PETER: I know, based on your files, you forgot to open your chute?
BLOND: No, I was all the while focused on the way down
ST. PETER: Then why did you not open your chute?
BLOND: I tried, but I guess it was too late
ST. PETER: Hmmm, that's strange. It also says in your record you're clean of drugs and the chute's not defective...
BLOND: (adding with conviction)...and I followed the jumpmaster's instruction to the letter
ST. PETER: (who's about to close the book and call it a day, puzzled, looked at blond)..so, what about the instruction?
BLOND: ...to open my chute when I see Ants on the ground starts to look like People....
lapuks2000@yahoo
2006-12-29 19:56:39 · answer #2 · answered by Mr. Kite 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Very funny! Hahaha. A good joke and original.
2006-12-29 19:23:01 · answer #3 · answered by Shotzie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Cheap at half the price ! haha
2006-12-29 20:22:51 · answer #4 · answered by Scotty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice one..lol
2006-12-30 05:27:14 · answer #5 · answered by Im outta here. 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Very good
2006-12-29 19:22:37 · answer #6 · answered by Georgie's Girl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good one!
--That Cheeky Lad
2006-12-30 00:59:40 · answer #7 · answered by Charles-CeeJay_UK_ USA/CheekyLad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol........naughty nun.....nice one.....totally hillarious. i giv u 10/10 for this beauty :)
2006-12-29 19:24:49 · answer #8 · answered by tasha 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol thats so freaking funny
2006-12-29 19:24:46 · answer #9 · answered by Live To Party Bust Your Move 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
haha ew
2006-12-29 19:22:29 · answer #10 · answered by BrittanyxAriel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋