I have an amazing boyfriend that I've been with for 7 months. We live together and are crazy in love. We've decided that we want to get married eventually and the thought terrifies me. I keep worrying that I might make a mistake and what if he's not the "one"... I love him with all my heart and he's the most amazing guy I've ever met, so what's wrong with me?
2006-12-29 11:07:46 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Nothing is wrong with you. You have the same issue i have, or so it seems, you have what you think is great in front of you but you think there is better, so you want to hold out. You have or probably have high standards, always waiting for the perfect man, he's not going to come, You can ditch the one you have and keep searching for one who will treat you better but they won't and you'll get bored and tired of the realatioship and always wonder why you kicked homeboy to the curb. Just go with your heart and what makes you happy and smile, and at the end of the day realize the man laying next to you at night is the only one who loves everything about you, no matter what.
2006-12-29 11:14:25 · answer #1 · answered by snowflake9540 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Girls instinctively get nervous and have second thoughts at the last minute. It's a natural defense mechanism (because you know there are consequences to committing to the wrong guy). It's the same defense mechanism that makes you hesitant right before you sleep with someone for the first time.
7 months is pretty fast, but I'm not one to say it Can't be real. So, take your time from here on out. Find out if this guy is capable of taking care of you and providing for you. And as you learn more about him over time, you'll begin to feel better about the situation. If things don't work out, don't be afraid to walk away.
2006-12-29 19:45:13 · answer #2 · answered by unprdctble_m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is absolutely nothing wrong with you.
you just got used to being free (not exactly single, but free to start or end a relarionship when needed), and so when you have that thought of committing into something, you get a little scared, and possibly having second thoughts. it's normal to be a little terrified. all you have to do is talk to him about it and go through this together. or at least give yourself some time to think things through, make sure if you really want to get married now or if you need more time.
2006-12-29 19:14:36 · answer #3 · answered by dancer17 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its just a natural reaction to the thought of being committed to someone for life. thinking you will have to give up your freedom and be responsible for someone else. Not to mention the anexity of possibly having kids and a family and losing all the freedom you enjoy at this point in time.
However you need to just chill and relax, because trust me a committed relationship is the best thing in the world. DO NOT go into a relationship or marriage what iffing or thinking it cant work. Because then you are dooming it from the beginning.
2006-12-29 21:06:41 · answer #4 · answered by Artemus959 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u love him as much as u said, then there is no way u would go make a mistake (cheating wise). in order for u to know if he is the one before marriage, u have to set goals. meaning u have to know what is ur type and what do u want in him and out of ur relationship. if u set those criteria from now and set them straight then u will be able to figure out if he is the one before u go marry him. the way to do things like that is to not get emotionally involved with the person, b/c people tent to use that as a feeling of love. i wish u luck.
2006-12-29 19:33:07 · answer #5 · answered by sweet143 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Research his past. Make sure he is in love with you. Some people fall in lust because they've never had sex frequently and casually, which happens in relationships. Check to see how his parents relationship turned out. Most importantly, have christian values. Those are usually the most important values that tie together a marriage. Two spirits coming together to become one.
2006-12-29 19:15:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Its called common sense. You can always ask questions and evaluate where you are and what you have. If you can stand the scrutiny, then you can rest assured that you made the right choices. You can talk to him about this too. he probably has the same issues. he may not wrestle with them as much as you..or maybe he does, you just don't notice he when he does. You realize the seriousness of your actions. Asking us is a start. you may want to ask someone whom you know that may best give you the answers that you seek.
2006-12-29 19:11:52 · answer #7 · answered by Neptune 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe your nervous because it seems you two are moving really fast. Try slowing down the pace. Stop talking about marriage for a few months and see how you feel.
2006-12-29 19:11:47 · answer #8 · answered by You Don't Know Me! 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's only been 7 months. That's your "alarm" going off. Just hit the sleep timer and relax..for now.
2006-12-29 19:11:04 · answer #9 · answered by INDRAG? 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If u don't think that there is something better out there what are u waiting for marry him and be happpy together
2006-12-29 19:11:58 · answer #10 · answered by The Hottest thing around 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋