I think my guy is insecure bout me and my feelins?

Question

My boyfriend will joke about me breaking up with him over silly things. It bugs me and makes me feel bad like I'm not making him feel secure about my feelings for him. I've talked to him about it. Is there something I can do to help him not feel insecure about me? or is it something he needs to work on himself?

Answer 1

It's tough to help someone with whom you are connected very closely to improve their security or self-image. That stuff was learned a LONG time ago. You may need to get more serious and definite and let him know how seriously you think the matter to be. He's trying to manipulate you into not breaking up with him. Manipulation in any form is quite serious. You can't fix him but you can and should be a little slow to commit because there may be other manipulations he'll try too.

Answer 2

If you have been in this relationship for awhile, he may have deep seated insecurity issues. Another possibility is that he is picking up on your unspoken feelings that you may not even be aware of at this time.

If it is a relatively new relationship, however, he may just need reassurance that he is "doing ok".

Answer 3

You aren't responsible for "making" him feel secure. You cannot do it. He will choose to feel secure or insecure based on his past experiences, experience with you, and his ability to trust.

However, you should let him know that it troubles you when he makes comments like that. Communicate...he can't know it bothers you if you don't tell him.

Answer 4

Some people just need constant reassurance that they are loved. After a while, that need will fade and confidence will take it's place. Treat it as a compliment that he doesn't feel worthy of you.

Answer 5

feeling of insecurity for those who are weak.not for you.believe it.