Does anyone ever feel trapped in their own home..??

Question

Im a girl and my parents are very over protective. They log everytime I go out and have only one friend, where I work.

Im 22 and am doing a part time MBA at University so cant afford to move out. Im planning on visiting my friend in London (100 miles away) next week for 2 days. I feel sooo guilty because of what my parents will think. Should I be feeling this way?

I am indian and parents are very cultural........

Answer 1

The best thing you can do is leave home and support yourself if you dont want them to interfere...lots of parents still interfere because they cant understand that their children are adults now..and some are control freaks.

Answer 2

Oh my God, that's terrible. I think in the US that is a form of human rights violation. I don't understand-you are 22? First of all, that is a bit old to be living at home still and secondly, you should be treated like a 12yr old. My first impression would be to say that they are crazy. They log your nights out? Why? That's insane.
When I was 22 I already lived overseas for 2 years by myself.
It sounds like your parents don't trust you. Did you do something bad in the past? If this is not the case, then they are exhibiting extreme control issues that borderline on psychotic. Person growth is more important than education at this point. Withdrawal from your MBA program (you can pick it up at a later semester), get a real job and move out and learn to support yourself.
Are you of an eastern decent? I notice nonwhite friends that I have have parents like this. I move to New York city with my girlfriend and have been looking for work the past month. I'm so sick of being at home all the time! Get out and walk or something. You have to to stay sane.

Answer 3

Of course you should not be feeling guilty. You are 22years old and are now in charge of your own life.

I bet by 22 your parents were already married and living together. I suspect that they are worried about you and log your every move because they feel that one day they will have to speak on crime watch or provide details to the police about your last movements but you have to tell them not to worry.

I get the impression that you are blaming the fact that you have 1 friend on your parents, if this is the case then that is not fair. You need to move out of home. Life is too short to feel trapped and lonely. Shared accommodation is cheap and living with others has it's benefits. Live within a budget and as a student and you will enjoy life more... go on... be a devil... get a life!!!

Answer 4

not at all, and they will get over it faster than you know. have a little more faith in your parents. it's time for you to go find yourself, and it's perfectly natural. it's also perfectly natural to feel this way. i felt the same before i got married and moved out. it was a little tough at first, but got better much faster than i expected. then i felt trapped within my own home when i was pregnant and stuck on bedrest. it went away a couple of months after i gave birth. it does get better... the only way to see is to take that first step and go visit your friend. keep communication lines with your parents open and that will help reassure you!

Answer 5

I've mixed feelings about your question because I do understand you point of view. From the point of having been in a similar situation, albeit many years ago. Whilst you are still living at home that will not change because whilst living under their roof it is not unreasonable to live by their rules but you have to start to make your mark and (effectively) stand up for yourself. You need to do this now or find some way of moving out. ...maybe a shared residence with other students?
The main problem with parents is..........you will always be their child (as my mother commented to me only this week.....and I'm 52!) They will always feel protective of you but it is up to you to loosen the bonds. But (speaking now as a parent) please try to do it kindly and not just move out and cut them off. When push comes to shove they are the only ones who will be there for you when life gets really tough. Friends have a way of disappearing at those times......again, from experience.

Answer 6

No way, what sort of parents are they? You're not a kid any more, so why are they holding you back? Take the break, & feel liberated. Try to extend the stay if you can. When I lived at home, I could come & go as I liked, just as long as they knew where I was. Tell them they're affecting your studies & maybe they'll back off.

Answer 7

Though your parents undoubtedly mean well, their overprotection is having a negative impact on your life. At the age of 22 you really ought to be going out socialising with people or you will start to feel very lonely.

Answer 8

Your parents will probably be very pleased that their daughter has finally found a life outside of the family home. Don't feel guilty feel excited - your parents will understand

Answer 9

This isn't right.. you're an adult, I can understand why your family are over protective - but why are they logging everytime you go out? You need to break free from this behaviour, before it effects any future relationships you may have.

I would dump the course - get a job and get out.

Answer 10

Yes, your parents probably ARE overprotective. However, you are choosing to live in their home. If you want to be treated like an adult, find a way to finance your own life and get out. As long as your live off the good graces and finances of your parents, you are still a child. You can't have it both ways. Either quit whining or move.