I've noticed recently that, out of my friends, I have the most trouble with relationships. I'm as polite as physically possible, and I'm a football/basketball player. Yet somehow, I seem to get into the "I only like you as a friend" scenario. I've heard the same line "Some one will eventually come along who will be perfect for you." Sadly, this line doesn't help me at all. I would like to find a way to stop waiting, and find some one, WITHOUT becoming the weird guy who asks everyone out. Any help?
2006-12-29 06:08:19 · 22 answers · asked by BJ 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
attract them to you first, then make sure they like you, then ask them out, and you'll never get that answer.
Being polite is great, but what is more important is attracting a woman. If you attract a woman (by being a man), it will all fall into place.
What's being a man? Many things.
It's not just being polite, but also standing up for something you believe in, being strong in the face of danger, making clear and quick decisions, speaking clearly, concisely, and with authority, among other things. Have purpose, direction, and drive. Be a leader. A real man will take charge and follow his own decision even when his girlfriend tries to steer him on another path, but at the same time will take her suggestion into consideration.
A woman needs to be able to trust you and she will be only be able to do that if you are sure of yourself and your abilities.
Pay attention to personal grooming and clothing choices. Be neat and clean in all areas. Make it a part of who you are and not just something you are doing. Women will assume that if you have a neat and clean appearance, you probably clean up after yourself at home, are responsible, have a great relationship with your mom, etc.
It's your job to take care of a woman when you get her in a relationship. Ooze confidence and women will flock to you.
Think about why women love certain hollywood men like George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, and Mel Gibson. Yeah, they might be handsome or what not, but they are all MEN and not boys. They make their own decisions. They're ultra-confident. They're themselves. They're not afraid to speak their mind even if no one else agrees with them. Watch a movie with any of these guys in it. Look at the way they dress, the way they move, the way they talk to women, the way they act around other people. They are always in control of themselves. Always!
Hope this helps.
2006-12-29 06:10:23 · answer #1 · answered by ftz 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL, that is hilarious the weird guy that asks people out all the time!! That is so true. Everyone knows that weirdo. Yeah a great piece of advice is act a little bit like your not available and throw is some bad boy at the same time. Girls eat it up! If you are unavailable and a little bad at the same time it makes the curious to know what it is your hiding or what it is you have to offer that the other freaks dont have.
2006-12-29 06:18:23 · answer #2 · answered by renew69 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you? Because maybe everyone is right when they tell you that someone will come along. Don't change who you are just so someone that doesn't really care will possibly think of you as more than a friend. What's wrong with friends? And why would you want to be with someone who could only accept an altered version?
2006-12-29 06:11:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might be coming off as needy and desperate and women are definitely turned off by that. They are attracted to men with confidence who act like they can take them or leave them, not like they will be destroyed if the girl rejects them. Women like to feel that a man has specially chosen her and not like he is desperate and will take anyone. I'm sure guys are the same. So...work on acting confident and like you don't care that much and at the same time keep your eyes open and watch for a girl to show you a sign she is interested first. Women usually do this when they are attracted to a guy. They tend to be subtle though so you have to watch closely! Like she might let you catch her looking at you, then she'll turn away really quick. Or she'll hold eye contact with you for a couple seconds, or smile if she's more bold. Then that's your signal to talk to her and I bet 9 times out of 10 you won't get rejected. This works a lot better than approaching a woman who hasn't sent you signals, because women rarely respond favorably to a man who approaches them out of the blue. But if he catches our eye first, it's a done deal. So just keep your eyes open, watch out for those subtle clues. You might ask you friends to let you know too if they see a girl checking you out. Good luck.
2006-12-29 06:19:35 · answer #4 · answered by bellyyo62 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say this, but maybe you're Too Nice and polite? Yes girls like guys to be nice but some of them are just too nice and it's a turn off. They know if they can "walk all over you" and girls don't dig that. Did you ever watch that movie Bedazzled? Rent it, watch it...it's pretty funny. The nice guy part is funny...a little over the top but you'll get what I mean by being too polite and nice...and emotional.
Some girls like the bad guys...guys who give them the "I don't care about you" act. And when they do show they care, it's so much more special to them. Don't ask me why...it's just how it is. Sometime you just can't explain things. I admit, I dated a guy who was just too darn nice. I dumped him. Now I probably would give anything for someone like him...but that's life. Us crazy gals - we never know what we want.
Good luck out there.
2006-12-29 06:15:44 · answer #5 · answered by Michele K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And I'll repeat the same line. "WAIT FOR THE RIGHT PERSON TO COME ALONG." Are you really in a hurry to get into a relationship? Don't go round asking everyone out. That's just plain dorky. Increase your cool factor, get a few tips from experienced guys, then wait for the ONE. No point getting into sumething with someone who wasn't made for you, is there?
2006-12-29 06:14:29 · answer #6 · answered by Mad Scientist 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hear this all the time. And I do this all the time. there are guys out there I just want to be friends with, either I am not attracted, or I am in Love with someone else. I know this advice is gonna suck, but honestly, your time will come. don't settle for any girl who doesn't want to show you all kinds of attention and love you. Be happy these girls aren't playing you along. That would be worse.
2006-12-29 06:11:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont make yourself so available. Stay being Mr. Nice Guy, but dont over do it. Girls like to be teased a little bit all in good fun though, so dont go too far. Also, display confidence & self esteem without looking like an ***. I think in the end if you stay yourself, even if the nice guy finishes last, he'll get a great gal !!
2006-12-29 06:16:52 · answer #8 · answered by California Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Act as if you are the hottest thing but keep it low key. Maybe you could change a few minor details about you the way you act around females make it seem as if you have someone and then girls will get curious. Makw yourself seem like a great catch by your actions.
2006-12-29 06:13:01 · answer #9 · answered by FASHION*DIVA 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand, I am a pretty hot, intelligent and very nice girl. I love volunteering, reading, and I am also funny (pretty cocky ha) yet I have always had bad relationships. I have learned from things and realized that I am always attracting the same kind of guys because of who I am. Start analyzing what the girls you have dated had in common (ex, dysfunctional family history, arrogant, etc). Then learn from it.
Best of luck
2006-12-29 06:13:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋