Lately, when I meet guys they always tell me they like that I'm smart and ambitious but when they find out that I make more money or know certain people they always get competitive and back away. Why are some guys not mature enough to handle being in a relationship with a female who happens to be doing her own thing and doing it well? I don't brag & I don't boast because the way I see it I have a long way to go but I refuse to stop or slow down to stroke someone's ego. I also do not discriminate, I date guys that still live at home and I date guys who have accomplished more than I have and they still get competitive. Actually I even dated an older guy to see if age was the problem and even he got antsy when he found out that my career goals would soon put me close if not above him as far as authority and we had been together 3 years. I even had a guy whine when he found out I had a license to carry and a BA, and he didn't. Do guys really want smart ambitious girls? If not, why lie
2006-12-29 01:52:33 · 11 answers · asked by h8ucrazee 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
competion is bred into men. also men act that way if their ego is hurt.
2006-12-29 01:56:24 · answer #1 · answered by Little Momma 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To be honest there is more guys out there that will be intimidated by a successful woman than infatuated with her. Relationships are hard and they take time to develop, and if someone is to skittish to explore things than its there loss not yours. As for why guys seemed frightened by you, well it has to do with society standards. Men are expected to be the major bread winner and dominate force in a relationship, take that away from some men and they panic. Losing ones self identified role is very scary and makes people unwilling to accept the unknown. THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT, so don't worry about it. In time you will find the right guy, just be patient (which may not be something you want to do but have to). As for guys claiming that it won't effect them, they may think that, but until they are faced with it they don't know. So its not always lying just lack of experience. I know you don't brag or boast, but do you let the guy pay for dinner or movie when on a date? Sometimes its the little things like that mean more to some men than the w-2 gross at the end of the year (not all but some). If that doesn't work for the guy then move on and find one that has enough confidence in himself to know that he doesn't have to take care of you, but be there for you. (one other thing, age does not equal maturity)
2006-12-29 02:14:24 · answer #2 · answered by Derek 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe they're afraid your career will take time away from the relationship and you won't get to spend time with them. A lot of guys want someone to be a mother for their kids someday and a "career" woman tends to put work first. My guess is that you're probably mid-20's and you come across as being a little full of yourself. You sound like the one who is competitive to me. Smart, ambitious, and goal oriented is hot. Big ego, too worried about money, and someone who thinks they're more mature than everyone else isn't hot. Try pretending you're a normal girl for a while and the guys will like you.
2006-12-29 02:05:07 · answer #3 · answered by Joe 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Pride is the culprit here. Guys get defensive whenever their manhood is challenged by the success of a woman. They feel threatened unless they are the man on top.
Personally, I think it is silly.
For me, that simply means I can now buy that big HDTV. Guys simply have their perspectives all screwy.
From birth and society we are bombarded with the message that we have to be the breadwinners. Well, we all have a role to play but seriously, who cares who all brings home bacon? That's just more bacon to eat!!!
But then again, I'm a weirdo so that's just me.
Yeah, pride sums it up lady. We want a woman to be certain things but not better than us. Its a wrong way to be.
Its hard to replace pride with humility. But man, life sure is easy when we do!
2006-12-29 02:02:04 · answer #4 · answered by Emperor Insania Says Bye! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're just not meeting anyone worth your time. Its hard to find a mature person in this day and age. Chances aer you're better off without someone if he can't handle your person success. I know this answer sucks, but its the truth.
2006-12-29 01:58:26 · answer #5 · answered by Joe P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys do want smart, ambitious girls...unfortunately, you've been dating men who are insecure with themselves. There are many guys that are secure with who they are and will encourage you to be the best you can be. Don't give up. There are men who will be able to manage your success along with his own!
2006-12-29 01:56:53 · answer #6 · answered by jeepguy_2x 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you just met a bunch of gies that are shallow or jealous.Hang in there.One will be different.Your due.
2006-12-29 02:03:14 · answer #7 · answered by Honest Injun 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they dont feel like are doing the man job like providing and what not plus they probably feel like it doesnt matter cause there pebble of money cant stack up to your mountain of cash.
2006-12-29 02:00:35 · answer #8 · answered by lonelyone000 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would Luv for a gal to make more than me!! Ambition is Hella Sexii!!!!
2006-12-29 01:55:04 · answer #9 · answered by ballman4425 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just do what you want & god would make you to meet you to a dreamboy of yours whom he would think is best for you
2006-12-29 01:59:22 · answer #10 · answered by ujjwal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋