falling out of love?

Question

I would do just about anything realistic for my boyfriend, even if we werent together and he needed my help id be there for him. I care about him alot. but i just wake up somedays and i dont love him anymore. it happened twice now. the first time it happened i felt numb and no pain or feelings for him i stopped talking to him because i was thinking how good it was i could go without talking to him, he then called me and we talked and i felt feelings for him again, then the second time was this morning i woke up and i just felt sick about him and everything. but then he still came over and everything was fine. i know the feelings are there but they keep going away. and i dont want to give up on him. but how do i try staying in love with him. or is it just not worth it.

Answer 1

I am married and I have come to realize that after five years some days there are good days and some days are bad. We have to learn to accept both and kinda embrase them. Perhaps you just need to get out more with your friends or spend time away when you start to feel that way, give yourself a chance to miss him. When you are with him make sure he knows you love him, and when you are in doubt tell him you need some extra love. I will tell my husband don't talk to me I am mad at you for no good reason other than sometimes we need a break or he ignored me when I was trying to get his attention. Ususally he leaves me alone for while and then starts picking on me. With four kids, working, school, homework, and cleaning...who wouldn't need a break, hell I can't go to the bathroom without a child standing at the door hollering MOM! Somedays I'll spend my day trying to get his attention as if I were a child, I'll poke some fun and tell some stupid jokes, and play fight... only to get him rolling his eyes at me and probably wishing he could slap the crap out of me. I drive him nuts because I forget things all the time, I don't remember what I forget, but he says I do it all the time...lol. You can't just walk away from a kid and say well I didn't want to be a mom no more and in my experience men aren't much different than children. Many people get bored, need extra love, or a break. It is normal. Don't give up. Try to liven things up. Give it time, or is there something more to it? Could it be depression? The easy thing to do is give up. The hardest thing to do is keep at it. Don't stress over it too hard or you'll only wind up pushing yourself further away. I do think you need to sincerely talk to him though because you shouldn't have to go through it alone. Sometimes we loose the lust we once had, but it is replaced with love. You can go out and find someone else but I can guarantee you'll go through this all over again and again till you stick to it and see it through. Don't entertain the idea of spliting up even being a possiblity. Entertain more positive ideas... life is what you make of it. If you believe it to be happy you can make it so. If you believe yourself to falling out of love you can make that so as well. Good Luck

Answer 2

I'm pretty sure my boyfriend is going through the same thing you are going through. In all honesty, he just wants to walk away...after awhile, when that feeling keeps popping up, it gets to the person feeling it...and the results are usually never positive. My advice in your situation, would be to sit down and have a heart to heart talk with your man and figure out where you guys are -or aren't- heading.....figure out if you both want the same thing and if it's worth the headache to try and overcome all that has come between you. There is always a productive way to solve things, even if we don't necessarily look forward to the conflict. The only way to fix this is to figure out what YOU want...and if you are getting it with the person you are with.

Answer 3

Spend more time with him, then decide for yourself. Only you will know the true answer in your heart. We can only make suggestions. Maybe you need to be with him more often, learn even more about him. Don't worry, you'll see. Perhaps you were meant to be just friends? Or perhaps you just don't seem to be getting to know him any better, so you feel that things are getting a bit stale. Maybe he's just not giving you the attention you deserve. Or maybe not. Talk to a friend or someone you trust. They know you better than I do. Good luck!!!

Answer 4

First of all this is completely normal and happens in a great many relationships. But the hard answer is that he isn't the one for you. You know this already in your heart, but the reality of coming to terms with this is going to be hard. It sounds like the two of you would be great friends but nothing more.
It would be worth finding someone who you don't have mixed feelings for every now and then.

Answer 5

You JUST NEED SOME SPACE.Its not that you dont love him because obviously you do..if when he comes over or you talk to him..you fall in love all over again.Its not that you're falling out of love, but maybe he's smuthering you to the point that you just want and need some SPACE.Make sure you have a social life and friends.Keep your love life seperate.It could be that you REALLY like him but you just dont want to BE WITH HIM. You need to dig down deep inside of you and ask yourself WHAT IS IT THAT YOU REALLY WANT.Best Of Luck,Happy new Year Girl.

Answer 6

Relationships take work and there are a lot of ups and downs. Sometimes you will feel a lot more for the person than others. It's part of the growing pains in a relationship.

Answer 7

Love is a choice. You fall in lust. Love is choosing to love someone, no matter what. You make that decision every day - to love a person, or not to love them. Some days it's just easier to love a person than others. You can chose to love a person through the hard times, if you have the commitment and devotion to that person to carry through. That's why they say in marriage vows "through sickness and in health, through good times and bad, til death do you part".

Answer 8

Maybe you are spending too much time with him? Space out your visits because sometimes you can just get sick of seeing people. When you feel like you can't have someone all the time it becomes alot better when you do see them.

Answer 9

If you can fall out of love you don't know what true love it and it's more than a feeling or your convience or that happy feeling you get. Love is a committment when your at your worst staying with the person no matter what and being there when people are not at their best. Are we thinking about ourselves? True love is completely selfless.

Answer 10

I feel really sorry for your boyfriend. Love isn't a game, it's not a toy, it's a human being you're playing here. Love isn't fading, it's about sacrifice and devotion, it's not a condition. The romance may come and go but the love won't.