WE broke up on xmas eve.. he broke up with me. he says hes not ready for a sersiouse relationship, except we've been together off and on the last year and ahalf.
We'v had our share of problems but then we both got saved and things were going reallly good. i mean this is the guy i want to spend the rest of my life with.. we made plans to be together forever. and then he tells me that. and i dont know what to think
so xmas rolls around and he watns to hang out that night so i say yeah and we hang out and we fool around. i mean REALLY fool around (not sex tho) and he keeps telling me he loves me and calling me baby. but he wont be wiht me. and then when we get off the phone he tells me he loves me (somtimes) and he tells my gfs that he still loves me. what is up with this?!?!?! ahh im soo confused.
Ps. im 19 and hes 17. that MIGHT be the problem.
Help. what do you think. and dont tell me to move on. cuz i loove him way to much to do
2006-12-28 16:53:59 · 19 answers · asked by FairChild 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
umm not that I care about the age difference because I'm 24 and have been attracted to guys that are 16-18 at my work. Still I wouldn't advertize anything on here that you almost or have already had sex with a minor.
and the guy problem you have. Just tell him you want to be with him with no expectations out of him. Tell him you have strong feelings for him but you just want to enjoy your time together having fun,laughing and feeling good and doing whatever. Tell him you want to live in the moment so this will take pressure off of him about marriage or anything like that. he cares for you but you have to ask yourself does he show that he appericates you.
if you "fool" around with him it'll make it easier for him to do that with you and not be your man.
tell him how you feel and just ask him what he wants and then if what he wants is something that'll make you happy too then do it. ya know if he's like I think things got too serious and we got ahead of ourselves say that you can take a step back or two and go back to being happy with each other but not focusing on the furture but rather on just being happy to be together and having fun. and that he you won't give him rules or obligations. (like I have to be with you every Friday nght or call me every night around this time or know where you are or anything like that cuz most guys don't like that).
I hoped I've helped you.
you can e-mail me at DaBluSchmosPrincess@yahoo.com
Tricia, 24 with experience and much insight and read people well:-)
2006-12-28 17:02:41 · answer #1 · answered by dabluschmosprincess 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The age thing might be a little bit of the problem. He just cant see himself in that kind of a relationship, altho u are ready for it. If he really does love u like he says he does then he needs to step up to the plate and let u know that for sure. And if u love him enough then do whatever it takes to get through to him. And since u are saved u could let god handle it, he knows what is best. It just akes time for it all to workout. Best of luck again. And God bless.
2006-12-29 01:02:07 · answer #2 · answered by Smoke Eater 512 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you really care for him it might be time to give him some space so he can think about what he wants. You know the saying of let it go and if it is meant to be then it will return.
Men take longer to Mature and with maturity come knowledge of what is really important. Love and commitments.
I wish you the best and I would also say to pray on this matter. Talk to him about your feelings and let him know that you are praying for answers. I would not give up but I would not push the issues.
2006-12-29 01:01:40 · answer #3 · answered by Cheryl D 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You might just need to take a step back from the whole situation. NOT saying move on, but just evaluate where you are going in your life, and where he is going. Him being younger doesnt really help your cause, but if you really love him, just let it breathe for a minute. Only when you have looked at it from all sides clearly will you be able to see what needs to happen
2006-12-29 00:58:20 · answer #4 · answered by OPTIMUS DIME 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well - since you were saved (congratulations by the way!!!), maybe he feels guilt or troubled by the temptation you guys have when you are together. Temptation is a very real and difficult issue for all people, and as followers of Christ, it's important to fight that temptation. So yeah - perhaps he loves you and does want to be with you, but feels guilt to God when you guys mess around and figures it'd be easier apart.
2006-12-29 00:57:52 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most guys arent ready for a real relationship at that age. They just want to have fun and explore choice and descover what they want in a girl. Just be patient. If he really loves you, than he'll make up his mind soon enough. But untill then just enjoy his company.
2006-12-29 00:58:26 · answer #6 · answered by dark_angel_360 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that your b/f is in love with you. On christmass night he must have kissed you (if not sex). You must have gone with him so far as to enjoy drink, sex and also kisses. You must know that kiss means every thing which means he and you must have embraced and did sex. Enjoy your way and tell me weather or not you will like to be loved by your b/f without sex? You can send me email.
2006-12-29 01:07:37 · answer #7 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i'm sorry i'm not a mind reader so i can't tell you if he really loves you. but to what i know, if a guy really loves a girl, he can't bring himself to say "i love you" every now and then so easily. instead, his actions will speak louder than his words. maybe you would like to take this as a little sign.
2006-12-29 01:15:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was in a similar situation my ex said he needed sometime to experience things. I gave him his space and he ended up getting another girl pregnant. If you love him and you don't want to move on then give him his space if it meant to be then it will be
2006-12-29 01:00:34 · answer #9 · answered by b4a0d9 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He doesn't want to close himself off to the possibility of someone better. You're not Mrs. Right, you're Mrs. Right Now. If you get back together know that it'll be on his terms.
2006-12-29 00:59:27 · answer #10 · answered by N/A 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋