Well I thought it was a baby thing but no at 15 months old it is getting worse and I find myself actually crying. Today we went grocery shopping and my 4yrs old was in the car part of the carriage and she didn't want to sit with him and had a full blown tantrum so I sit her in the top part of the carriage and the tantrum was even worse until I let her Literally sit on my hip. How could I push a carriage and deal with her like that. I had to leave and not get my groceries. This is like this everyday. When she feels like it she might let her dad hold her or play with around the house but she mostly only wants me and doesn't know how to enterain herself. I'm at the point that I don't want to go anywhere with her and I feel depressed from it. In my house I just put her down and deal with the crying but out I feel I can't let it go on to long b/c I'm in puplic, Anyway anyone have a child like this I need help everyone says she will out grow it but I need help now before I am crying all day.
2006-12-28 15:08:43 · 8 answers · asked by samanthangerard 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
I don't have one right now, but I did have a child like this 13 years ago. The first thing I did was ask for help from friends and family. From friends I found playgroups. We had to start slowly. She cried if I moved my head to talk to another parent. But I found the more I did this she found someone who was looking at her. I was worried the parents at the playgroup didn't want us because my daughter was so fussy but the opposite happened. The people really opened up to me and reassured me I was doing all I could and to keep coming back to playgroup. I also started a playgroup with a few friends. I would invited them over, let the kids play while we watched and talked. This really helped me emotionally.
From family you can also find relief. Maybe they could sit for an hour while you go out!
You need to take care of yourself too or else who will be there for your little ones. Best of luck!
2006-12-28 15:23:00 · answer #1 · answered by 2steacher 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used to call my baby "the ball and chain". And they really are!
When my oldest was four years old, the pediatrician suggested I take her to a psychologist because she consistently misbehaved so badly during her little brother's checkup. I was investigating the different programs and trying to decide what to do when she just magically outgrew most of the public misbehavior. So I never took her. Today she is an extremely strong-willed 20-year-old and doing very well.
My youngest child misbehaved so badly in the grocery store I quit taking him there, or anywhere else. It was too embarrassing. I was a single mom of 3, and so I did my shopping on the weekends they were at their dad's house. It was not easy to do that. I was very lonely, but I did make it through. Today I'm very thankful that I did.
This child is 15 today and he still is super-sensitive to all types of things. Hunger. Loud noise. Lights. He was an attention sponge. He soaked it all up and wanted more.
Most parents just drag their kid along no matter how much the kid doesn't want to go. Then they try to "control" the child into doing what they want. This just sets your will up against your child's. Yes, you can win. You're bigger. But what do you lose in the process of bullying your child?
At least you have a husband at home who can take her off your hands for a few minutes. Try watching a movie with her. You know what, the house will be there waiting for you to clean it up later. There is nothing that is more important than your baby - and she is still a baby.
Have a real talk with yourself. You can handle this. Adjust your expectations.
2006-12-28 15:37:51 · answer #2 · answered by Same Song Different Verse 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had a couple like this too. They all grew out of it when they were ready. I learned to use a backpack or sling to save my arms even in the house when cooking and cleaning. The people that practice "attachment parenting" recommend waiting until the child initiates separation-the child does that when they feel safe enough to be adventurous. I carried mine a bit longer than most other parents I know, but all my kids were independent by age two. They took on the world happily on their own terms. Sooner or later they will ditch you for their own friends. That will be OK too.
2006-12-28 16:01:50 · answer #3 · answered by Elizabeth 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She needs to be taught to let go.
Usually, when a child is like that, she is scared. You have to make her make contact w/ other people, play w/ kids her age, etc. Then slowly, she'll let go. It takes time though, so don't expect an instant result.
If she grows older (as in 5, 6 y.o) and she's still like that, something's definitely wrong. Then you should take her to psychologist. Seek professional help if you feel that the situation is beyond your control.
2006-12-28 15:13:14 · answer #4 · answered by Diamond 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
join the club, mine is 4 n still sleeps with me, wont entertain her self n only mummy can make it better. I have 2 teenagers who dont want 2 know me now their grown up n all independent. I console my self by trying 2 enjoy her clinging now coz her big brother n sister got over it eventually big time. When shopping etc... offer her a reward thats inexpensive n will keep her buzy n u free 2 shop then verbaly reward her 4 being good n eating the reward. say her favorite fruit or cheese, chocolate or drink it might make it more fun 4 her.
2006-12-28 15:22:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It takes time. I suggest you allow her father watch her for an 1hour a day while you get some time to yourself, then slowely increase the time you are away from her. Even if you take her to your parent(s) home or a friend. You will be purely surprise how time away from her will help the both of you.
2006-12-28 15:24:27 · answer #6 · answered by yay29 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perfectly normal behavior for a 15-18 month old...Congrats he/she is bonded to you...read about it on www.babyzone.com and put in your child's age....sounds like you had a rough day my dear it'll get better! Being a mom is a hard job!
2006-12-28 16:41:54 · answer #7 · answered by desertblue62 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Start in the home.
Tell her NO and take control again.
It is a control issue and you are letting the 15 month old control you.
2006-12-28 15:19:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋