How do i fix my 5 year olds attitude?

Question

shes yelling and screaming when upset and is demanding it be her way

Answer 1

what you need to do when she does that is tell her to stop it right now. if she keeps it up count slow 1...............2.............. you better stop ok 3 and then beat her ***. that will get her into shape real quick be a parents and spare the rode spoil the child and sounds like your child is spoiled time to break out the old rod

Answer 2

No parent is an expert on your child, because he/she is a human being unlike any other.

Just as when dealing with a spouse or co-worker, THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO CHANGE ANOTHER HUMAN'S BEHAVIOR-- you can only adjust your own.

From time to time, your child will be upset and will either react with his normal instinct or from a learned behavior (for instance, the way you (or his kindergarten mates @ school) react to stress.

First, check yourself and be sure you aren't setting the example here (this is hard to diagnose because we don't know the whole scenario). If that's not it, use your reaction to his tantrums to steer or guide him back to a gentler place.

Behaviors are best absorbed with repetition, so one day when absolutely nothing's wrong, say to him "Ben," I've been meaning to talk to you. Explain to Ben how he COULD handle the sitch better and that you think he will feel much better if he handles it that way. Also tell him that reacting with the tantrums will not get him the result he wants. Then next time he has a fit, remind him with some key words you talked about.

In our house, we might hold our hand to our ear as if we are trying to hear our child better. This is a verbal cue that reminds him that we cannot hear and understand his whining. After some practice, he has learned to take breaths and calm himself enough to tell us that he is frustrated because he cannot put his skates on or that someone hurt his feelings.

Once we have him talking, we can ask him if he wants help or if he needs time alone. A lot of the time, just the question-asking will lead him to solve his own problems.

If he's just being 'spoiled' and uncooperative, has no immediate need but to air his bad energy (which we all have sometimes), take a sterner (is that a word?) approach. We will usually count slowly to five (these days by number three he straightens up in a hurry because he knows something unpleasant is coming up next) and then administer appropriate punishment swiftly. This is fair because it gives him time to correct his behavior (providing you have explained what is appropriate once upon a time) and possibly avoid retribution. If they ignore your grace period and you are sure they understand the consequences, give 'em the consequences--they are testing you to see if you mean it. Once they know you mean it, they might choose differently next time. Good luck!

Answer 3

I remember a tourist in our country was asked what he thought of our country (this was on the news) and what impressed him most and he paused and said "how well the parents obey their children". So that was a very big embarrassment to parents who allow their kids to rule the roost.

If you let this child decide to be boss in YOUR house, then more fool you.

This is the problem parents trying to negotiate with a child. Who the heck is in charge? you or the child? Why are parents so afraid of their kids????? I've never seenanything like it. My sister in law stands there and negotiates while her kid is being rude, obnoxious and demanding this and demanding that and all you hear is her negotiating. It's embarrassing to watch.

Half of them need a lot of firmness and less talk. But oh no, now it's the new age psychology of "don't hit your child, you will do it great damage". Kids for years were brought up firmly and the occassional firm belt on tehir rear end didn't do them ANY harm. Now, no smacking and no this and no that and all you see are obnoxious brats telling their parents what to do.

you're not alone. I don't mean you do this, but seriously, don't allow your little 5 year old to dictate to you what's what. If you can't give a firm slap on her rear end and sned her straight to her room and shut the door and leave her there until she comes out and apologises, then simply take her to her room FIRMLY, put her in there, shut the door and let her yell and scream till she's blue in the face and ignore her. Then after a time, ask her if she's ready to apologise and behave herself, if not, leave her in there again.

It does work.

Answer 4

When I was raising my step kids they got two warnings for whatever they were doing, and then sent to their room. They were not allowed to throw anything in the front room, but were allowed to destroy their bedroom, with the catch of cleaning it before they came out :) The oldest always had an attitude, so warning her "to watch her attitude" became a daily reminding, but usually after one warning did it. Some times though... wow.. the fits she would throw. The trick is to remember once she "gets in trouble" she is not allowed to have anything her way.

example- My daughter through a fit and threw some thing, yelling and screaming, a tantrum on maximum. Punishment was a 5 minute time out, so she had to go sit on the couch, she kept yelling and screaming, blah blah, her time out does not start until she is quiet. While I was doing the time out her father called for a ride home, so I got the other kids ready while she was still yelling at me, but was running out of steam at this point-
I told her to get up and put shoes and socks on, she put socks on but put her boots on.
I told her no, her shoes.
she fought it, but told her that she in trouble right now and does not get to make her own choices.
When we were leaving she wanted to be the last one out of the house, I told her no because I have to close the door. she argued.. a lot.. because she wanted to have control over at least one thing before we went to go see her dad. I did not give her an inch that day, and ever since, she was the most perfect little 6 yr old you could imagine, sure she still got into time outs and sent to her room, but *nothing* like that one day. She listened better too, knowing that I would not back down, and I love her, but there are times that no matter what, what I say, goes. period.

Answer 5

You are the parent. It is very important that you let her know who's the boss or else when she becomes a teenager you are going to have a big problem in your hands.

Of course, your daughter needs to be convinced that you love her. Make a list of rules for your daughter. Under each rule write down the punishment for the breaking of that rule.

I am not totally against spanking, but I would rather not do it. Never spank your daughter while you are angry.

A good form of punishment is temporarily taking away from her things that she enjoys such as watching television. Even during punishment let her know that you love her. If she knows that you love her she may develop a desire to please you. When you look at her, make sure there's love in your eyes.

Answer 6

My 3 year old is the same way. I just talk to her and ask her questions like "why are you crying" or "why are you so upset" while loving on her. I usually stroke the side of her face and wipe away the tears or fiddle with her hair, something to let her know that even though she is very upset, I am not angry with her or disappointed in her. When she sobs out her answers that are usually "because you make me mad" I just tell her that I didn't mean to make her mad and that mommy loves her. And if she calms down we will get a pop and talk about it. Honestly, the whole thing is just to show her that she is not going to make me lose my temper or change my mind but that I will still love her even when she is being so difficult. Her tantrums usually continue for a few minutes, but afterwards, when she still has those little hic sobs, she's saying "I'm sowwy mommy"

Answer 7

LOL... I knew I would see the incredibly useless "timeout" proferred in this lefty paradise. Just teaching a kid that when he gets out of control that the worst thing that will happen is 5 minutes in timeout.

Keep up the good work, now I need a timeout for questioning the trendy timeout.

Answer 8

what I do with my daughter is give her a timeout. yes she may scream and yell, and I ignore that for a while....but I do not let her get her way. It depends on the situation of course. but something like talking to me in a way I disapprove I'll tell her right there: hey, you don't talk to mommy like that I don't like it.

but afterwards I'll sit with her, caress her, talk it out gently and tell her how much I love her.

Answer 9

I have a five year old and when she catch her lil fits i let the belt do all the talking for me and see now its my way or she doesn't get anything she wants or if you dont spank your kids just show her the belt and treaten to woop her and she'll chill out

Answer 10

ooh, temper tantrums on a 5 year old oh boy what fun, time to take charge and show the brat who is the parent and what will and won't be tolerated, spanking does work if used right, consistence with children is what they expect, she is throwing the fits because you have let her do them.