A man and his neighbor were heading out to their local golf course for a game on a sunny afternoon. The man arrived at the course, but he was waiting for quite a while, as his neighbor hadn’t turned up yet. Then he noticed a chap, a good acquaintance of his, carrying a golf bag walking there and waving “Hi”. The man called out to him,
MAN: "Would you like to join me for a game?"
CHAP: "Sure, I’ll be glad to join you."
So they started playing and enjoyed the game and the company of the chap. Part way around the course, the man asks the chap,
MAN: "What do you do for a living?"
CHAP: "I'm a hit man."
MAN: "You're joking!"
CHAP: "No, I'm not,"
The chap reaches out into his golf bag, and pulls out a beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight.
CHAP: "Here are my tools."
MAN: "That's a beautiful telescopic sight; can I take a look? I think I might be able to see my house from here."
(contd. below...)
2006-12-28 11:34:57 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
So he picked up the rifle and looked through the sight in the direction of his house.
MAN: "Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic. I can see right in the window. I can see my wife in the bedroom. Haha, I can see she's naked! But, wait a minute, I can see my neighbor as well, and what’s he doing in there…He’s naked as well! The b****!"
MAN: (turning to the chap) "How much do you charge for a hit?"
CHAP: "I do a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the trigger."
MAN: "Can you do two for me now?"
CHAP: "Sure, what do you want?"
MAN: "First, shoot my wife; she's always been mouthy, so shoot her in the mouth. Then my neighbor, just shoot his **** off to teach him a lesson."
The hitman took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a few minutes.
MAN: "Are you going to do it or not?”
CHAP: "Just wait a moment, be patient, I think I can save you a thousand dollars here..."
2006-12-28 11:35:38 · update #1
just answering to earn points.
2006-12-28 11:36:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
oh boy what away to earn a living 1 shot to get two targets great10/10
2006-12-29 01:31:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yuck
2006-12-28 20:34:23 · answer #3 · answered by ♫♪♫TAY-LUR♫♪♫ 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
An oldie but a goodie!
2006-12-28 19:38:06 · answer #4 · answered by mmcall 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
took me a little bit 2 get that one nasty but funny!
2006-12-28 20:10:15 · answer #5 · answered by Cayleen O 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Killing two birds with one stone? A mouthful?
2006-12-28 19:43:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
HAHA thats a good one.
2006-12-28 20:04:20 · answer #7 · answered by hello. it's me. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lmao i didn't expect that!! soo funny even tho it took me a second to get (im slow, huh?)
2006-12-28 19:43:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahahaha! thats a good one
2006-12-28 19:40:16 · answer #9 · answered by BrittanyxAriel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GREAT!!GREAT!!! Haven't heard this one, thought it was great!
2006-12-28 19:41:54 · answer #10 · answered by Navin Johnson 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋