Why do some parents hit their kids?

Question

if their parents did it to the as kids and it hurt why do they want to hit their on kids and AFTER THEY HIT THEM THEY HUG THEM AND SAY " I LOVE YOU" wat?thats so weird and if they wanna disepline their kid why dont they take their video game or mp3 away for a week or ground them its just wrong r parents retarted or something? i just get it i hated getting beat as a kid so im not goann do it to my kids


my parents hit me wit a shoe or a belt mad hard and in school they hit me wit a wooden ruler

Do u enjoy spanking ur kids u sickos?

Answer 1

They do it because they haven't the patience to find a better way of parenting. Most of the answers here make me physically ill. Spanking IS hitting, and thus it is assault. The beatings you received were terrible and you should be so proud you are breaking the cycle of abuse. Those who defend hitting their children simply have no other way to explain their anger and violence away. Those who "only hit when they aren't angry" are fooling themselves and no one else. What in God's name could cause you to commit battery on a child in 'love'? For those of you who only hit once or twice on clothing, you are STILL assaulting your child.

I'm so sorry you've had to go through this. I hope more out there like you realize how detrimental it is to hit someone defenseless when you do not like what they are doing. Some friends of mine, well-educated, caring, etc. hit their children. They are no longer friends I can trust. I cannot stand it when people come up with a million different reasons why it is OK to be violent with their children. There is NO difference between 'spanking' and 'hitting'. Especially since children have a limited capacity to deal with their anger and frustration. So many say "Well, I was hit and I'm OK so I'm going to do it to my own kids." Hmmm. Just that you are continuing the cycle of violence proves you are not as "OK" as you thought!

DRZ, I hope you have a trusted adult you can talk to about this. Your parents do not have a right to hit you with an object. It's illegal. What makes me ill is that they have a right to hit you at all. If you'd like, e-mail me with the area in which you live and I will try to find some sources to help you. You do not ever deserve to be hit and live in fear. Please call this number to learn more: 1-800-4-A-CHILD. It will give you someone to talk to about what you are going through. It sounds as if you may be at an age now wherein you no longer live with your parents (18+) and if this is the case I think it is wonderful you have gotten out with such a good heart. I really wish you the best and would be happy to help any time.

And for those of you who do hit your children: I'm afraid I cannot be nice. No child deserves to be hit and you are encouraging violence in a public forum. Please stop and learn how to discipline without violence. Also, realize that you may be talking to an abused person - save the 'hitting philosophy' for those who never were. One person mentioned that children "should only have to be told once". Is the same true of adults? Or you, for that matter? Children are human beings, your only job is to love and care for them. There are many ways to parent without hitting (and then defending it to a child/teen who is being abused). I cannot stomach the thought.

Answer 2

Disclaimer: the question is concerning the reason for and not the morality of "hitting." This is my opinion and experience... thanks.

If "hitting" to you is other than "spanking," then I am afraid I don't have the answer to that one (my wife, the psychologist would be more qualified to give you an explanation). Spanking, on the other hand should be, in my opinion as a parent, reserved for extreme/heinous behavior. Any physical punishment done as a reaction or erupting from any heightened emotional state is WRONG! Unfortunately, I've been down that road as the punisher... scary to think I wanted to hurt my own child. A spanking, given without any "tools" (belts, paddles, etc), and after a calm non-emotional reason why it is being administered can have positive effects. Age is a big deal... pain is a visceral, tangible element that a young child can understand and associate with "bad things" (touching a candle flame, et al); a spanking would be archaic to an older child who has a grasp on cause-and-effect and other abstracts. As for the "I love you" part... that's just it! Parents who love their children don't let their kids "get away" with wrong-doing; they set boundaries and provide guidelines for their children. Regrettably, there are times when spanking is involved with punishing the wrong-doing, or preserving the guideline/boundary.

Answer 3

No its horrible
My sister wants to die and she stabs herself .shes always sad. Because our mum hits us.shes 14 im 11. Just because r dad tryed to kill her she blames us. Hope she dies

Answer 4

Parents hit their kids because they kid themselves into thinking it's not abuse. Yes, many of us were spanked and turned out fine. Many of our mothers smoked & drank while pregnant, too, but we now know better.

When parents are upset & tired, that spanking can so easily cross the line to hitting and worse. Any parent that doesn't think they have the capacity to do that is wrong - we are human beings and are imperfect.

There are some idiots who quote the bible and say things like "I'd rather be a parent than a friend". The bible doesn't condone spanking children nor does it say "spare the rod, spoil the child".

Yep, spanking works. It works because your child is afraid of you. That isn't something I can live with and it sound like you can't either.

Answer 5

Im gonna be honest with you
it worked on me. Yes my mum hit me hard and it hurt like ****. But my mum never said sorry i hit you. Nope she just left me to cry but i gotta say if she took my things away i would just get it back by staying up all night and acting like a ninja. Also i use law against her so she cant take the things i paid for. Yes i do pay for my phone and tablet and stuff. But i disagree with the parents who beat their children under ten years old like that is child abuse. Im a teenager so i know what is right and wrong so obvs you get hit but for a child to nit know what is right and wrong and beat them is what i think is wrong l. Instead you should teach them that its wrong to do that

Answer 6

My stepdad used a belt and when ever now that i am a stepparent i won't if i get so mad that i feel my temper getting the best of me i will tell her i need a timeout from her and i will leave the room. I don't want the cycle of abuse that was in my household to continue it is just wrong. The i am sorry but.... most of the time parents will raise kids how they were raised good or bad it is all they know.

Answer 7

Your child is going to know the difference between beating and loving discipline. Go ahead and not spank your kids--but don't come crying to us with a question called "I can't control my son!!!!" The sooner you realize that "hitting" and "spanking" are two different things, the better off you'll be. AND IT'S SUPPOSED TO HURT, THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT.

And no, we do not enjoy spanking our children. You obviously just don't get it. Good luck!

Answer 8

spanking your child and beating your child are different
every child needs discipline which includes the occassional spanking along with the grounding and taking the toys away. This is a very important part of teaching your child that there are consequences for unacceptable behavior. And to tell them you love them afterwards, in the right situations is needed so that your child understands you love them but wont except the bad behavior. Also they will be better people in the future as adults

Answer 9

Hitting a child is wrong, spanking is a good form of disciple but then the child becomes to old so you then do the grounding etc. but if when the child was young you were smart enough to lay the ground rules and the child behaves now that he is older and know not to push your buttons .

Answer 10

Let's face it children hunger for discipline they all need boundaries. Corporal Punishment was part and parcel of school life years ago a belt across the ears was a normal part of discipline for parents to administer to their children. Discipline builds character and respect given with the right attitude sure there needs to be a balance. As we are all different depriving a child of their stuff might not be enough. I know how defiant and naughty a child can be kids can push buttons and stir emotions. Until you have your own child it's easy to judge.