OK ME AND MY FINACE HAVE BEEN GOING OUT FOR LIKE A YEAR AND ME AND HER ARE IN A LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE I AM IN THE MILITARY SO SHE IS IN FLORIDA AND I AM IN HAWAII. ME AND HER ARE CONSTANTLY FIGHTING BECAUSE SHE SAYS I DONT GIVE HER ENOUGH STUFF THAT SHE WOULD WANT TO HAVE..AND THAT I AM VERY CONTROLLING..WE ALSO HAVE A TRUST ISSUE..BECAUSE WHEN I WAS IN AFGHAN SHE WENT TO GEORGIA WITH SOME FRIEND AND SHE SLEPT WITH U GUYS WHILE SHE WAS DONE THERE FOR LIKE A MONTH. THEN I TOOK A PICTURE WITH A GIRL ON NEW YEARS..SO THATS WHY I DONT TRUST HER AND SHE DONT TRUST ME..WHEN WE ARE TOGETHER WE ARE SO HAPPY..BUT ONCE I COME BACK TO HAWAII ITS STARTS ALL OVER AGAIN. WE ALSO SAY THAT WE ARE GOING TO CHANGE SO THIS RELATIONSHIP CAN BE BETTER..BUT IT NEVER SEEMS TO WORK..SO WHA I WANT TO KNOW IS WHAT SHOULD I DO..PLEASE GIVE ME ADVICE..I DONT WANT TO LEAVE HER CUZ I LOVE HER WITH ALL MY HEART BUT STUFF IS NOT WORKING RIGHT WITH US..
2006-12-28 10:23:33 · 14 answers · asked by ORLANDOBOY1985 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Give up the Military and go back to Orlando.
2006-12-28 10:27:49 · answer #1 · answered by Agony Aunt 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its hard to be in a long distance relationship, my fiance is also in the military and i see him maybe three times a year, one at best, but we stay in touch via IMs, regular phone calls and emails, its especially hard because of the time difference. First u have to trust yourself, then u will learn to trust her, there are alot of temptations out there and its good to have self control.
Not because u love her with all your heart that means she loves u the same; evaluate your relationship, is it about having sex whenever u get together or is there a deeper connection, look for the things u have in common and build on those. She also has to respect what you do and understand that it will take you away from her for more time than you would want, but if your love is strong u should be able to survive your time apart and when you get together its that much sweeter. I didn't realize just how much i love my fiance until he was away and it constantly feels as if a part of me is missing. I hope this helps, good luck sweetie
2006-12-28 10:35:44 · answer #2 · answered by tweety 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave her! We learn from our past experiences and others. If she really loved you she would of never slept over some other guys house and she would not be asking for stuff. She obviously is having doubts her self and you can't be with her 100% of the time. Do you really want to worry about what she's doing when you're not around? Keep her as a friend if you want but I'm sure you can find a better partner for life. One that will be happy to hear your voice and only expect you to faithfully love her and trust her like she does you.
2006-12-28 10:34:31 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is hard with that distance, but seems like she cannot be trusted while you are away...I do not know why people cannot remain faithful to each other, if she loved you she would not want anyone else...She knew you were in the Military, I am not sure what the answer is for you guys...Trust is a big issue...without it a relationship cannot survive... I wish I could give you the answer, Is there anyway you could get her with you?? Good luck
2006-12-28 10:37:20 · answer #4 · answered by Brenda Soooooooooooooooooooooooo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
See you on Divorce Court...
Trust is more important than love in a good marriage...You can have trust and respect and still get along great or love, and fight over who wronged who more...
People cannot change who they are for very long...you can always be on your best behavior for awhile - like when the parents come over or your CO walks by but day after day, month after month, your true personality will return. Sounds like you dont like the personality that you have left now that you are engaged...if there was a slide from dating to engaged, just imagine what marriage will do!!!
Dump her, nicely.
2006-12-28 10:29:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You love her more than she loves you! A relationship is based on trust and you guys are failing!!! Plus, she sounds very materialistic...wanting more things! If you really want to work it out than go see a marriage councilor with your finance'. However, you can't make someone change if they do not want to! You improve on the controlling issue and she needs to work on her cheating and materilism! But, if this does not help than you need to take back the engagement! Better to find this out before you get married!
2006-12-28 10:31:42 · answer #6 · answered by September Sweetie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to stay with her then I think you will have to get help together as a couple and work on your list of problems.
I think there is a major trust problem along with problems talking and being open with each other. It will be a very ruff road but, it can be done. Good Luck
2006-12-28 10:27:42 · answer #7 · answered by zen522 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
number 1, if you guys loved each other so much, no one would be cheating in this relationship. that is not how a relationship works...also 2 wrongs don't make a right. my advice is to let it go. it will hurt...trust me, i know, but eventually you will find the right one for you. not what you wanted to hear, i know, but it's the truth. good luck.
2006-12-28 10:28:17 · answer #8 · answered by trisha_r_c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all....get rid of the anger and the caps....second...if you can't get it together while you are fighting a war for this country and she is home then what are you doing. Now you are in Hawaii and she is home and you still can't get it together....she cheated on you while you were putting your life on the line...is that ok???? I don't think so....she sounds selfish and greedy and I think you could do much better.....good luck
2006-12-28 10:27:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you dont want to leave here i would try to get some help. professionaly. obviously when you are able to be home. she sounds a little pathetic to me, im sorry. i hope you have told her so even. she needs to realize maybe that not everything can just be handed to her ...
anyway i hope you find the answer that really helps you. i wish i could do better.
have a great night!
2006-12-28 10:36:58 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋