A Polish man moved 2 USA n married an American girl.They got along very well until 1 day he rushed in2 a lawyer's office n askd him if he cud arrange a divorce 4 him.
The lawyer said tht getting a divorce wud depend on the circumstances, n asked him the foll. questions:
Hav u ny grounds?
Yes,an acre n half n nice little home.
No,I mean wat is the foundation of this case?
It made of concrete.
I don't think you understand. Does either of u hav a real grudge?
No,we have carport,and not need one.
I mean. What are your relations like?
All my relations still in Poland.
Is there any infidelity in ur marriage?
We hav hi-fidelity stereo n good DVD player.
Does ur wife beat you up?
No, I always up be4 her.
Is ur wife a ******?
No, she white.
Y do u want this divorce?
She is going to kill me.
wat makes u think tht?
I got proof.
What kind of proof?
She going 2 poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore n put on shelf in bathroom. It say "Polish Remover."
2006-12-28 09:21:20 · 17 answers · asked by cartman 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Good punch line!...it really takes you up to the end. LoL...Did you made that up? I'll pay you back with...what else...an original piece of blond joke I made 3 days old...
In a Sky jumping school, all students were readying for their very first jump. Naturally, all were excited and nervous. With their plane aloft at 8,000 ft, the Jump Master made a final reminder:
So girls and boys, this is it!. Remember what I've been telling you all along...forget your 'Altimeter'...on your descent when you see People on the ground starts to look like Ants, that's the time you open your chute...OK? Everybody nodded.
A little while later, all 20 students were out of the plane. One by one, their chutes began to pop up like mushrooms over the sky...except for Blond jumper. To the horror of her jump mates and the crowds below, blond jumper chute didn't open and she went free falling to the ground. Thud!!!
>>>Fast Forward to Heaven's Gate, with St. Peter screening all new comers>>>
Blond's turn now:
ST. PETER: So, what are you IN for?
BLOND: We'll.. I fell from a plane
ST. PETER: I know, based on your files, you forgot to open your chute?
BLOND: No, I was all the while focused on the way down
ST. PETER: Then why did you not open your chute?
BLOND: I tried, but I guess it was too late
ST. PETER: Hmmm, that's strange. It also says in your record you're clean of drugs and the chute's not defective...
BLOND: (adding with conviction)...and I followed the jumpmaster's instruction to the letter
ST. PETER: (who's about to close the book and call it a day, puzzled, looked at blond)..so, what about the instruction?
BLOND: ...to open my chute when I see Ants on the ground starts to look like People....
lapuks2000@yahoo
2006-12-28 09:42:01 · answer #1 · answered by Mr. Kite 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Polish Remover .......funny
2006-12-28 17:50:41 · answer #2 · answered by MikeDot3s 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL too. But he needs to find out what 'polish remover' is before jumping to conclusions!
2006-12-28 17:30:46 · answer #3 · answered by Esmerelda 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes,you did tickle my funny bone.Thank-you I need that laugh
2006-12-28 18:10:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was a knee slapper! Not funny
2006-12-28 17:44:54 · answer #5 · answered by ljw49ers 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hahhahahaaa!! LOL!!!
2006-12-28 17:28:01 · answer #6 · answered by Zealotta 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol............ i loved your joke!
Great punch-line by the way!!.....i giv you 11/10 for this beauty :)
2006-12-28 18:01:55 · answer #7 · answered by tasha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it was okay. but it didn't make me laugh. nice job though.
2006-12-28 18:26:28 · answer #8 · answered by Marie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahaha very cute!
2006-12-28 17:30:43 · answer #9 · answered by *NuBCaKe* 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahaha, a little dumb, but funny.
2006-12-28 18:01:44 · answer #10 · answered by AleOmar 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋