How do I get over my friend's death?

Question

Last night, a girl I knew died of a blood clot in the brain. We we not close friends, or even friends at all.. but I knew her. She was the type of person who everyone loved. Kind, funny, talented, charismatic, and just an overall great person. Is it weird that I am so torn up about her death when I didn't even know her very well? Well, either way, I am torn up about it. How do I get over her death? I don't take deaths very well. I know that she is in a better place now, but every time I think of her, I think that it's not fair. She was only 18 when she died, and she didn't even get to graduate yet. Help?

This is in response to "S H."
Small stuff?!
She stopped breathing. Her heart stopped beating, and her brian stopped sending signals to make the rest of her body work. She died. She is never coming back. If this was your friend, this wouldn't be a "small stuff" type of deal.

Answer 1

There's no easy way to get over someone dying like this. The fact that you didn't know her very well just proves that your are a very caring and empathetic person.

Go ahead and be sad, mourn now, and as time goes on and you feel like it hasn't gotten any easier to deal with, look back and remember how hard it was when it just happened. You will heal.

My condolences to you, her family and friends.

Answer 2

I wonder how you'll feel when it's a loved one or someone you are close to.

The bottom line is simple, death is inevitable. Though, when death takes someone at an earlier age, it's more dramatic, but none the less, it's a part of life. Even though this person never graduated, think of all children who will never get that close to highschool or middle school due to terminal illnesses. You can dwell on the reasons why someone was taken so young, but you will never receive an answer as well as a waste of time and resolves nothing. Your best option is to accept the most logical answer based on your faith, then move on. This is why it's very important to live and enjoy life to the fullest extent without risking your own life. Worrying about the simple things solves nothing.

Remember...."don't sweat the small stuff. It's all small stuff"

Answer 3

My sister has the same reaction to death.She cries over people that she has only known for a day or two.
My theory is that she is uncomfortable with dying.
As someone else said,death is inevitable.Young,old,no one is immune.It is probably the only thing on earth that we can be sure of.The reason so many fear death is because it is an "unknown".
And because we arent sure of what we believe in.
Maybe you need to do a little studying about it.Read near death experiences,books or articles on dying.There is a wealth of information on it.
Try facing that fear.It will get less and less when you understand it more.

Answer 4

Maybe you're so upset because you wanted to get to know her, but never got chance?
To help get over it, try talking to some of her friends or family as they will know what you're going through. They won't think you're being stupid as you didn't know her too well, but if she has all the qualities you mentioned, they'll surely understand why you miss her so much. You don't have to know someone really well to miss them.
Hope this helps, and I;m sorry about your friend

Answer 5

im going to try to answer this, and it might be hypocritical at the moment because a friend of mine just killed himself and im definitely not over that yet. im just going to put that aside and answer how i would have answered a few days ago.

three years ago there was a shooting at my school, and i lost a good friend. the only way i got over it was finding closure. closure is different for everyone, and nobody can help you find it but yourself. my main closure was when the shooter was prosecuted in trial, but without asking a friend for help i never would have made it through. good luck.

Answer 6

i think you are taking this worng, no offence and my apologies if this does offend you in any way, but think of her family and very close friends how they must be feeling, they would be more shocked and depressed, you said you did not know her well, but people die anyway, and what bothers me is that people will some day eventually DIE, old age, diseases but you cant do anything about it, nor can anyone, so pay your respects and move on by diverting yourself from the pain. think of the future not the past :)

Answer 7

The best way is to find out who God really is and find the truth which is in the king james bible, many are going into eternity lost, this is a shame when one can know 100% where they are going

Answer 8

well you cant really. sometimes you never can. death is permanent and it's almost always sad. Everyone deals with death differntly. Just surround yourself with loved ones, talk about to get it out of your system, cherish your memories, and live life to the fullest. it's not fair - it never is. and the young ones make it esp hard to deal with - i know.

Answer 9

I am so sorry for your loss. The best thing you can do is to go on in your day-to-day life, even if you feel like you're faking it. Read your Bible as much as you can, especially the New Testament. Paul is great for encouragement. Pray, pray, pray and ask God to help you through this. Paul says in Phillippians, "I can do all things in Him who strengthens me." Talk to your parents about it, and don't be afraid to ask for help.

We'll be praying for you!

Answer 10

well i lost my best buddy july 20,2006 her her mom and two sisters and there neighbor heard them sreaming and kicking and trying to get out but he didnt do any thing thers no way you can get over her death and im sorry this happened to you my friend was 13 when she died she died of smoke inhaulation and i hate talking about it b/c i cry my eyes out well best wishes to you and sorry i hoped i helped you out