There is a muslim girl in my school and nearly everybody hates her. They call her a terrorist and make fun of her and her religion.
She wears a scarf and she is really beautiful. She keeps herself to herself. When people say something to her she smirks and walks off. I dont think she has told anyone about it. Recently a girl pretended she was interested in her religion so she invited her over to her house. The girl got hold of her pic (without the scarf on) somehow and she and her friends got her head and stuck it on a naked womans body and publically humiliated her. Everyone was laughing at her and i could tell she was hurt. People call her ugly, dont know why because she is really pretty. I want to talk to her but i dont know what to say. What should i do? No rude comments please.
2006-12-28 04:22:43 · 16 answers · asked by Bored 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
She is quiet, i have never seen her give anyone a hard time.
2006-12-28 04:35:57 · update #1
That is definitely heart breaking. I can't imagine the countless kids who have to go through similar situations. Unfortunately, this kind of behavior, since it is or seems to be racially motivated, only feeds feelings of anger and hatred among people on the receiving end.
It is admirable that you wish to help or at least to befriend this girl. But it will be difficult. I can guess that she will not be ready to trust anyone because she may be well aware that the school's staff will not do much to help her.
Rule out visiting her outside school hours for now. Build trust during the school day. Start by just saying a friendly greeting and just try breaking the ice in the beginning. As the days go by show interest in her, as a person, and not necessarily her religion. That might make her suspicious. If you Can stand up for her when she is being bullied, then do so (you would be very brave indeed! it won't be easy). If you can't offer any help with that, then at least offer comfort.
Good luck. I hope she finds a true friend in you.
2006-12-28 08:04:29 · answer #1 · answered by druid_gtfx 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh gosh, this is harsh. How stupid and narrow-minded people can be! I don't know how far you are able to go with standing up for her, but if I was in such a situation I would wear a black scarf and go around with this all the time, for a start (well, forgive me, for this is not that responsible and I have finished school). I suppose that the girl cannot trust anyone now, can she?
Well, you should try to encourage her at first, saying to her that people have always made fun of what they do not know, covering their fear of the unknown/different and possibly their sense of inferiority*. This has happened and is still, unfortunately, happening with african-americans, homosexuals, the so-called "nerds" and "geeks", obese people etc. Since muslims are so much connected to terrorism in the usa (not only there, but..), she has to be twice as prepared and have confidence, believe in herself, because no one is going to do it better than her.
[About this incident with the picture, wow, the devil inside me would propose her lots of ways to retaliate, but] You could also tell her that this is a time when she could try to "grit her teeth" (is this the right idiom?) and show superiority of character, by walking in dignity and without the fear of being judged by people she should not really take into account**. Say to her that you are willing to be friends with her (if you aren't, say that you aren't interested, but you would not have a problem hanging out with her), perhaps that you are not interested in her religion, but that you respect her different culture as you would like your culture to be respected.
I can't think of anything better right now. I could even talk to her, if
she wanted to, I do not know. My e-mail address is available.
*also, since she has not done anything wrong, she should not doubt about herself and be confident
**in the end, it is too silly and indicative of the quality of those girls.
2006-12-28 13:02:46 · answer #2 · answered by supersonic332003 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you could set an example for everyone else by being friendly and kind to her - not that you aren't already. I agree that the matter should be taken to the principal or administration. No teachers should be allowing this to go on if they are witnessing it.
I listened to a public radio story about a 4th grade Muslim girl who was receiving similar treatment. Even her teacher allowed it to go on. They eventually had to transfer to another school.
This is where I wish people would really think about the anti-Muslim comments they make in their every day lives. It promotes an atmosphere of hatred and intolerance, and it is the innocent ones, like these children, who will pay the most. Children hear, observe, and absorb so much more than adults think they do.
My heart breaks for these kids.
2006-12-28 12:37:54 · answer #3 · answered by milomax 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
After the last girl pretended to be interested in this girl's religion, only to humiliate her, she is likely to have a hard time trusting anyone else. Perhaps you could buy her a nice card and write your sincere feelings about the incident and let her know that you are not like the others and would very much like to be her friend. It may take small steps at a time to gain her trust, but if you are sincere and persevere, you will be doing a very noble thing. Good luck.
2006-12-28 12:31:45 · answer #4 · answered by MyPreshus 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
First of all hatz off 2 ur kindness...
About what you have asked, Muslim girl who you are talking about is really lucky to have someone like you & you are the best person who can be her friend but yeah she wont easily trust anyone due to that bitter incident however as someone already mentioned here she must have taught 2 forgive & be patience therefore just be yourself & talk to her.
Well…About those students…Itz almost the same case in everywhere however more you(her) pay attention to this & greater their insults will be so just ignore this & move on…Letz hope they will reckon about diz one day...If thingz didnt improve then look for next better option with the advise of your school heads...
God bless u, her & everyone…
2006-12-29 13:33:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm with Jibba
Talk to her nicely, maybe give her a gift, to show you like her.
And slow talk to her about it. When I read what you told, my anger grew, I don't like when this happens, It really hurts me.
Defend her as much as you can, advise her, nicely and calmly. Tell her to be strong, if you can get hold of her email address. And as a Muslim, I would be more than happy to help.
As Jibba said, tell the headteacher/principal about it, if that fails, take it to court for racism and discrimination. I've been called a terrorist.... all I am is a normal Muslim boy, that practices his religion.... It's a really big insult. And about the picture part, that is totally not right. Someone needs to sort those people out. And the girl who pretended to be intrested in her religion, shes no good, shes just as bad as the rest. dispicable! Makes me sick, how can some one do that!!! URGH!!!
So try to keep a strong bond between her and you. As I said, get her gifts to show you like her, confort her when shes on her own, spend quality time with her.
I hoope things go well, I really do.
Feel free to contact me.
2006-12-28 12:36:50 · answer #6 · answered by Mr Stick 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That's unfair and unkind. Possibly be a different story if she was a "fundie" but she doesn't sound it.
You should maybe try and be an honest friend to her, of course you may get some wrath in return from the others.
Remember school is about cliques. Geeks, Nerds, Peppies, Jocks, Brains, etc.
2006-12-28 12:59:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
thts really bad! im so sorry 4 da way dat gal mus be feeling.
neways, sinz she alredy got tricked by one person, da girl wud def hesitate 2 talk 2 u or sumthin. cant u try 2 talk wid da gals who r doin dis? masha'allah she has some patience!!!!!!!!
jus talk 2 her casually n dont be xtra frndly i suppose! jus incase she doubts u 2 n jus as sum1 els mentioned talk abt general stuff.take it one day at a time. muslims are taught 2 4give n im sure she knws dat 2 also im happy dat u hve taken da initiative 2 help her! oh yes n DONOT care abt does bullies 4 standin up 4 her!
2006-12-28 12:30:37 · answer #8 · answered by NS 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
That's really awful. People are so mean. I can't believe people would be so sick.
Anyway, try a regular conversation starter: Hi, how are you? Introductions, comments about the weather, how are you doing, and go off from there.
2006-12-28 12:28:17 · answer #9 · answered by Lady of the Garden 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
They just had a case like this on Dr. Phil. A bunch of kids were facing prison time for it.
2006-12-28 13:03:07 · answer #10 · answered by luvwinz 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋