My daughter is in an interacial relationships, please help me.?

Question

When my daughter first started dating an african-american man, I couldn't have been happier. All her life I taught her about the horrors of slavery and the greatness of the god-kings like Martin Luther King Jr and Rosa Parks. I'm a progressive liberal so I am more enlightened then your average american. I was so happy, I even didn't mind the age difference. She is 18 and he is 39. But my problem is that I think this man is taking advantage of her. He made her stop going to college so she could earn him money. She used to work as a waitress but that wasn't enough money for him so now she is a stripper. Worse, he lets his friends sleep with her but they have to pay him. I know this is societies fault so I don't blame them. Also, he had beaten her in the past, but I couldn't possible understand his rage. Sadly, she recently contracted HIV from one of the men and her boyfriend fliped out. He assualted me and said I owed him. I gave him some money but he said it wasn't enough. What can I do

Answer 1

I cannot believe how bigoted you have become. This man's ancestors were held in bondage by white devils such as you and he deserves more than just your daughter and a few measly dollars. I suggest you sell a kidney, mortgage your house and get a second job to help him out.

Answer 2

I'm not sure this is an actual question cause there seems to be no other answer then the complete obvious:

Contact you local law enforcement agency!!!

He has beaten your daughter, caused her to contract HIV, has beaten you, and demanded money from you, and it seems like the problem is that he is 39 and she's ONLY 18 not that your daughter is in an interracial relationship. That has nothing to do with it. Whatever you do don't give him more money that's only allowing him to know that he has control over you and then he will not stop. No matter how scared you may be you can not show it under any circumstances.

Answer 3

I think you need to reshape your silly progressive liberal brain. If you had taught your daughter right (that is NOT societys job by the way) she wouldn't be stripping or have HIV or put up with this pile of semi-manhood. I was raised never to depend on a man, gert your education and YES! be a conservative- and I'm a hippie christain,save the world conservative and a full time artist- not a typicalMarried to a South African immigrant who is my best friend. You are still hung up on race or it wouldn't be mentioned here- and you did. Wake up Mom! Get her out and sit down and both of you reassign yourselves to a cleaner, better and more MORAL lifestyle. I don't care if your purple (or a liberal) just don't be an asphalt- if you know what I mean. He's dangerous and is hurting her- time to MOVE!

Answer 4

First, quit assuming that the problem is the interracial relationship. Second, start realizing that educating your child about slavery before dating a black man is like educating your child about molestation before dating an in-law... irrelevant and naive, if you think that has any bearing on the relationship. Now, on to the real advice... Well, let's see: He's assaulted you, whored out your daughter, and god knows what else. So, just call the police, get him arrested, and you'll get your daughter back. Stop living in fear; just approach the problem from a sensible standpoint.

Answer 5

First of all the problem is not that your daughter is in an interacial relationship; the problem is that she is in an abusive, exploitive relationship. He is not simply taking advantage of her he is using her as a prostitute. It is interesting that the man in question is 20 years her senior since such as age difference with your daughter still being too young even to consume alcohol legally already places her at risk for being controlled and manipulated.

It is ironic that this man has assaulted you and that you gave him money. Your daughter is not doing anything really that different from what you did. She is putting up with behavior that is horrible and if I were her I would be very angry. Assault is illegal and you can press criminal charges. What has stopped you? Fear of retribution perhaps? While I am not in a position to tell you that your fears are unfounded I can tell you that when you give in to fear and intimidation you modeling for your daughter the very behavior you wish her to change in herself. I urge you not to give in to fear. It has been my experience in working with criminal, anti-social types such as the man you described that they are notorious cowards when consistently confronted with firm limits that can be back up by law enforcement. And make no doubt that the law is on your side. Your daughter is an adult so he cannot be arrested for child abuse and statetory rape. You can alert the police that he is a pimp, which is illegal. You can give them any and all information you know about him. I would urge your daughter to reports the abuse herself and support her by offering her a place to stay and whatever else she needs to focus on work, HIV treatment, an education, and the therapy she clearly needs to address the self-esteem problems that allow her to accept such abuse. Do not allow this man in your home for any reason. Do not give him money and do not accept any excuses or apologies. He is a thug and a criminal. If he has keys to your home change the locks. If her harrasses you in anyway call the police and tell them you are afraid this man is going to do you bodily harm. If he threatens you or assaults you further call the police. Do not allow people to tell you the police won't or can't help. In my experience the police can and will to the extent they have the cooperation of the people who need their help. If you are uncertain of how to engage the police call a women's or domestic violence shelter in your area and ask to talk to someone about your situation. If you don't know where to look try Planned Parenthood, which is an excellent resource for all women's health and safety issues.

Finally, please get some help for yourself. The fact that you don't know what to do when your daughter and you have been targeted by a criminal is clear evidence that your daughter cannot possibly do what you are unable to do for yourself. Good luck.

Answer 6

I cant wait to see all of the "geniuses" that answer this as if it were a true question....


EDIT after 43 posted answers...
I cannot say that I am too shocked at the number of how do I say this...good Samaritans...(read as not to quick in the brain...)...who actually believe this question and do not see it for the tongue in cheek posting that it is....Now I know why so many of those emails that ask for peoples bank account number and pin number work...there are a lot of weak minded people out there.....

Answer 7

oh dear..she's your daughter..first of all..shouldn't you have responsibility to protect her in the first place? how can you let her work as a stripper and do nothing about it? but first things first..didn't you object about it when she stopped going to college and earn money for the man to spend?you should have prevented her from seeing this man immediately if you know that's the case!and seeing that your daughter is being manipulated by a man..doesn't it hurt u a least bit?and besides..that man is abusive..and from the start..u suspected the man is taking advantage of your daughter..why didn't you stop her from seeing this man? i really don't understand..she's your flesh and blood and yet, you have the heart to see her undergo all these torment physically and mentally...!

Answer 8

What a big mess! You don't owe him a dime. Sounds like he was prostituting her. I am so sorry to hear that you daughter has gotten HIV. That is so sad. I would report him to authorities. Who in the hell does he think he is? I don't think you sound racist at all, you just want what's best for your daughter. I wish you and your daughter the best of luck. May God bless both of you.

Answer 9

Contact Jerry Springer.

Answer 10

First of all, it seems like your story already ended in a tragedy. My question is, why didn't you do anything to stop this? It's too late to be asking people for advice now. Even if your daughter is of legal age, obviously she was not mature enough to make decisions for herself. You should've stepped in a long time ago, before her "boyfriend", if you can call him that, turned her into a prostitute. This story doesn't seem true, though.