Ok, I have this friend who has a crush on my boyfriend. They were talking and stuff about going out before me and my boyfriend started going out which was about a month and a half ago. My boyfriend gave me his password for msn and stuff and said that I could do What ever I wanted, so i went and looked at his e-mail. And i was reading one that was from my boyfriend and my friend and they were talking back and forth and stuff. We were going out when they were talking in this e-mail. He was saying that she was hott, and wondering when she could come online, and what time she does, and saying that is she really wanted she could get a good boyfriend. Is this cheating? What should I think of this? Please help I am so confused...
2006-12-28 03:55:47 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
its not cheating bc you just started to date him and you should not consider someone your bf after going out only a mount in a half. give it time don't rush things. and for the cheating that is not considered cheating. and if it does bother you i would just talk to him and tell him how you feel and if you want something to work the best thing is to have communication in any aspect in life
2006-12-28 03:59:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO it is not cheating unless they spoke of hooking up. Were you spoken of in the exchange? Are you positive it's when you two were alreay together? The e-mail was never intended for your eyes and I don't think your bf wanted you reading those exchanges. It is unfortunate that you read this as you now feel that he thinks something of here whether it be that she is hott or whatever. If he gave you his password then you can try just being honest and telling him you ran into this e-mail exchange and ask him "what gives?" Or you can let it go. I have found in my experience or actually I have learned that snooping leads me to drive myself crazy cause I will come up with my own perception of why someone acted the way they did or said what they said. Best thing is to ask him and give him his password back. You really don't need it. Look what your going through right now. Or if your afraid he might speak with her again then just watch the e-mail and see if he does. You have to ask yourself what you want to hear. Do you want to hear that he doesn't think she's hott? That he hates her? That he didn't write those e-mails? What will make you feel better? That's the hugest question here. You can also confront your friend who is a SLUT if this exchange did happen when you were already with him. They may try to pull out the "we're just friend's car" BS!!!!!! Kick him and her to the curb for hurting you like this if there is not good explanation. Good luck! '-)
2006-12-28 04:02:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you met him when he was dating her, so he was sorta cheat on her with you. You are or at least were the other woman. If you weren't threatend then, why would you be threatened now. You won the battle at least. Is the war still going on? Is this behavior still occuring now that your are bf & gf? maybe he was just trying to break the news to her that he was chosing you over her. This is why you need to learn to trust him. You cannot look at his personal correspondences or you will just find things to become upset over. If he is going to cheat, does it matter whether or not you know today or tomorrow?! If it does happen, everyone knows what will happen when the truth comes out. Don't worry about that which you cannot control only worry about that which you can. Beside, how can you enjoy a relationship, if you spend too much time worrying about how and when it will end. You're on the ride, stick your hands out and scream like a banshee. When the ride ends, please exit to the left and check for your personal belongings.
2006-12-28 04:05:59 · answer #3 · answered by Neptune 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think this is cheating, exactly, but if you don't put your foot down now, then it could lead to it....
You should talk to your boyfriend and tell him that it makes you uncomfortable that he talks that way to your friend.
Considering he gave you the password, he has nothing to hide.
But I think that you need to take a frim stand RIGHT NOW before it gets too out of hand.
And apprently, he has deeper feelings for you because he is with you and not with her.
Good luck!
2006-12-28 04:00:19 · answer #4 · answered by ananji@sbcglobal.net 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having your boyfriend talk to one of your friends isn't bad. But if they are constantly talking to each other over the phone, i would probably worry. If they talked before you started dating him, don't worry. If he gave you is msn password, that's a big plus. He's proving to you that he has nothing to hide. His past is just that, his past. However, i don't know how i would handle knowing that my boyfriend dated my best friend. good luck!
2006-12-28 04:04:20 · answer #5 · answered by Scorpio Chika 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say this is a gray area. Flirting is perfectly fine, and a healthy outlet. But, if they are taking that next step and acting on it, then it's wrong.
In this situation, if this was at the beginning of your relationship, then it should be fine. If they were e-mailing after your relationship after you two got a bit closer, then it is cheating.
2006-12-28 03:59:23 · answer #6 · answered by Average Joe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
♥ Girl it sucks to be you right now. I feel for ya. But If the emails were before you guys were going out then that it not cheating. You need to talk to you man and ask him If he still likes your friend. I think you should be worried.
2006-12-28 03:58:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If currently while you are his official girlfriend he is having these conversation with your friend, i would have nothing to do with either of them. If these things occurred before when you all were just going out forget about it look to the future, but keep an eye on them.
2006-12-28 04:05:10 · answer #8 · answered by Ans 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its not cheating allthough they may be but what i find strange is that he obviously wnated you to see it so either wants be open about so you can see he isn't cheating or he looking for an excuse to break up so he can pursue a new relationship. allso have you considered that he might be gay, cos us guys generally don't say things like if you 'really wanted she could get a good boyfriend' to girls it just strikes me as a bit off....
2006-12-28 04:02:42 · answer #9 · answered by phillipgdmn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I personally do think that is cheating....but ur bf was kind of dumb for letting you see that email you should tlk to him abt it and worst case scenario you need to get rid of both of them only because wht if she tries it again i don`t think u want tht 2 happen
Good Luck
2006-12-28 04:08:44 · answer #10 · answered by Ash 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋